Fix You
by xx.royaldisaster.xx
Summary: After spending the summer doing nothing but partying, Harry returns to Hogwarts for his sixth year. Distanced from all those close to him, he turns to the one person he has grown close to. A certain Potions master. Will Severus be the one to save him?
1. Chapter 1

"UP! GET UP YOU IDIOT BOY! I'M SICK OF YOU SLEEPING ALL DAY!"

Harry Potter woke with a start, pressing his hands over his ears in order to drown out his Aunt's shrieking. He had a terrible hangover and she was just making it worse. His head felt as if it could explode at any moment and he felt bile slowly rising in his throat, but he managed to swallow it back down. How much had he drunk last night? He didn't even remember coming home and there was no telling what time that had been.

He rolled over and looked at the clock. It read quarter to twelve, much too early for any human being to be awake. Especially one with a hangover. He was going back to bed for a few more hours and sleeping this horrible feeling off. Screw the woman screaming at him through the door. He was not getting up for anybody.

Over the summer, he had stopped listening to a word his aunt and uncle said. He went out when he wanted and came home when he wanted. He carried his magical possessions around the house. He watched the television, used the computer, and ate out of the fridge. He refused to do all of their chores and cook their food any longer. He had spent fifteen years obeying their every command, cooking their breakfast, and wiping their asses. He was done.

At first, they appeared to be shocked at his new found streak of rebellion, but they quickly saw the perks of it. Now they had a real excuse to punish him. A real excuse to beat him. They didn't lock him in his room or starve him anymore, but that didn't stop his uncle from hitting him every chance he got. That was why Harry had spent more time out of the house this summer than he had in his entire life. That and the fact that for the first time in his entire life, he had made friends in the Muggle world.

Friends who liked him for who he was, not because he was famous. Friends who did not pity him for the things that had happened in his life. Friends who were happy to just hang out with him, no stupid adventures included.

He must have dozed off once again because it was half past three when he rolled over and looked at the clock. He was shocked that his aunt had not tried to get him up again. Usually, she made a point of screeching at him until he finally couldn't stand it anymore. He rolled out of bed and crept down the stairs, going to sit in front of the television. Dudley was watching some stupid movie about cars that could talk, never taking his beady little eyes off of the screen.

Rolling his eyes, he went to sit at the kitchen table. It was no better in there either, where his aunt was cooking some kind of meat. He felt his insides churning as he put his head down on the table and began muttering to himself. "Don't puke. Don't puke. Don't puke." He had already puked all over the hallway last week. His aunt had been pissed, shrieking about her house and about how the freak had been drinking.

After what had felt like hours, he was finally able to convince her that he had just acquired a bad case of the stomach flu and she had seemed to believe him, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to fool her for a second time.

He shot up as a plate was slammed down in front of him again. On it were two pieces of toast. Harry looked up at her, raising his eyebrow. "It will take away the nausea." She informed him, turning back to the stove. He had to pinch himself to make sure he was not dreaming. His aunt was actually doing something nice for him?

"Since when do you care about my well-being?" Harry asked.

Aunt Petunia snorted as she began pulling seasoning out of the cabinet. "As if. I just don't want you vomiting all over my hallway again." She said, stirring the pan on the stove.

He took a tiny bite of toast, hoping he would be able to keep it down. "I already told you, I just had the stomach flu. It's not going to happen again."

"Keep lying all you want boy. I'm just waiting for the day that the cops drag you up on our doorstep. Don't you dare think for a second that we would bail you out of jail. It would do you some good to sit in a cell until those freaks decided to come get you out."

Harry finished his toast before flinging his chair backward and mumbling "fuck off" under his breath. "Just wait until your uncle gets home, boy!" She shrieked after him.

Yeah, that's what she thought. He was going to be long gone by that time. He hurried up the stairs and took a hot shower before retiring to his room. Hedwig was waiting for him on the edge of the window sill, a roll of parchment tied to her foot. He slowly untied it and gave her an owl treat before opening his letter.

_Harry,_

_So I've got some great news! We're rescuing you from the Muggles early this year. Mum and Dad worked it out with the Ministry and everything. You get to spend the rest of the summer with us! Thank Merlin, I don't know how much more of Phelm that I can take. Honestly, I don't know what I ever saw in her. Mione is also coming early this year. This summer's gonna be wicked! Oh, I almost forgot to tell you that Charlie has a new boyfriend. You'll never guess who it is...CHO CHANG'S BROTHER! It's a small world. Anyways, can't wait to see you mate. Somebody should be around to get you in a few days! _

_-Ron_

Harry tucked the note away in his night stand, sighing as he did so. He should have been more excited that he was leaving early to spend the summer with the Weasley's, but he wasn't. It was the same thing every year. He hated not being allowed to wander off of the property and while Ron was his best friend, he hated never having any privacy. He did not want to go to the Weasley's at all this summer, but he also didn't want to hurt Molly's feelings. What the hell was he going to do?

Deciding he would worry about it later, he changed his clothes and ran down the stairs before his aunt could notice he was gone.

He walked the thirteen blocks to Andy's house quickly, keeping his wand up his sleeve the entire time. Just because he was in the Muggle world didn't mean that the Death Eaters wouldn't be able to find him here and attack him. Or the Dementors, for that matter. He shuddered as he recalled last summer when Umbitch had sent the Dementors to attack him.

He pushed the door open and walked through the house quietly, knowing that the others were probably still sleeping. While he had made many new friends over the summer, Andy was by far his closest friend. They had met at the park one night when Harry had gone there to escape his uncle. It was after a particularly bad beating and his back was all cut up from being thrown into a glass mirror.

He had removed his shirt and began to pick the glass out of his wounds, thinking that he was alone. Andy had come up to him and he had lied about what had happened, allowing him to help him just the same. After his wounds were treated, Andy had produced a bottle of vodka and some cocaine. It was the first time that he had ever gotten high or drunk. The feeling he got was indescribable. He was able to forget about his pain and just be.

Later that night, he had told him the real reason for his injuries. Andy had been very understanding, telling him that he hadn't had the best life growing up either. They had ended up walking back to his apartment and he went home in the early morning hours. He had been coming back nearly every night since.

Andy had introduced him to an entirely different world. One where drugs and alcohol played one of the biggest parts in his life. One where he could be his complete self, without having to keep up an appearance. One where he wasn't treated like a child, despite the fact that he was only fifteen and everybody else was at least nineteen or twenty.

He was also the first person that Harry had ever come out to. He was high out of his mind on acid one night and had just randomly blurted out that he thought some guy on the television was hot. He had immediately expected rejection. Disgust. Anger. He was not completely ignorant of the world and he knew that most guys hated gay guys, but for some reason they loved lesbians. It made no sense to him, but that's the way it was.

What he had not been expecting was for Andy to immediately accept him and inform him that he was bisexual, but preferred men over women. He quickly found out that some of the people he had become friends with were homosexuals as well, but they didn't talk about it in front of him because they didn't know how he would react.

Finally, no more hiding. No more pretending to like girls. No more feeling like he was alone in his preferences. No more hating who he was. Andy had helped him learn to completely accept himself and not care what others thought. The world would never be rid from homophobia, but he could learn not to let it bother him.

Something Andy had said to him once would always stick with him. "The people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind." As soon as he got back to the magical world, he was planning on coming out to the people closest to him. If they could not accept it, he didn't need them in his life.

He walked into Andy's room to find him dead asleep, just as he had expected. "WAKE UP!" He screamed, dive bombing on top of Andy. He ignored him and wrapped the blankets around his face, trying to go back to sleep. "UP UP UP!" He yelled, continuing to jump. After a few minutes of this, Andy finally sat up and squinted at him.

"What time is it?" He asked groggily

"Almost seven." Said Harry. They usually went to the bar around eight or nine.

Andy immediately got up and began walking around the messy bedroom, picking up clothes to wear as he went. "Are the others up yet?" He asked. Andy also had two room-mates, Megan and Chad. They were pretty cool and Harry had grown close with the both of them. He shrugged and walked out of the room, leaving his question unanswered.

He heard the bathroom door shut and the shower start. Knowing they were all going to take forever to get ready, he lay back on the bed and pulled a tiny baggy from his pocket. "Hey guys!" He called. He got no response, but he heard somebody shuffling down the hallway.

"Yeah?" Megan appeared in the doorway, running a brush through her long brown hair. She was always playing with her hair, doing things to it in order to make it longer. Megan wanted to be like this girl Sami from a show they sometimes watched called Jersey Shore. She spent hours brushing her hair and taking vitamins that were supposed to make it longer. He always giggled to himself when he saw her doing so, immediately thinking about how simple it was in the magical world.

He held up the bag of cocaine and she sat down on the bed without another word. He reached under the bed and felt around until he came up with a magazine. He smirked to himself as he saw that it was a men's addition of Playboy.

He dug around in his pockets for something to snort out of, finally producing a rolled up dollar bill. He reached his hand in the bag and spread a decent amount of coke out on the magazine. Quickly, he used his Muggle id card to spread out two perfect looking lines.

Leaning down, he put one hand over his other nostril and snorted the substance up his nose, ignoring the burning feeling. Once he had snorted the entire line, he passed the dollar bill over to Megan who did the same.

He leaned back and closed his eyes, waiting until the others finished getting ready. He completely lost track of time as the high began to kick in. Before he knew it, they were piling into the car and driving to the club, blaring Ke$ha the entire way.

They had no trouble getting into the club as the bouncer recognized them immediately. The group began to split up and Harry made a beeline for the bar, eager to get his night started. He pulled his fake id out as he walked, ready to present it. Once he saw that it was Lance working, he slipped it back in his pocket, though.

"Hey Harry, what can I get for you?" Lance asked him.

He pondered his answer for a moment, trying to figure out what he was in the mood for. If he was sober, he usually just stuck with a Cosmo or something of the sort. When he was high as he was now, he preferred something stronger. He also had to take into account whether he wanted to be hung-over in the morning or not. "I'll have a vodka and gin tonic." He finally said. So much for not having a hangover.

A few hours later, Harry found himself lost in the sea of bodies occupying the dance floor. He was currently at the end of a grind train, grinding on some girl. A body pressed up against him and he grinded back against it, knocking back the rest of his drink as he did so.

The train dispersed and he turned around to see who he had been grinding on. Harry was surprised to find out that it was a guy, considering this was not a gay club. He was even more surprised to find out that the guy was hot.

His hair was short and black and it had the same tousled look to it as his own, only it didn't look ridiculous on him. His eyes were a deep blue color. He had his lip pierced, a small silver hoop sticking through it. He was wearing a pair of ripped up jeans and a button down shirt. A trucker hat was perched on his head, facing forward. No, hot didn't even begin to describe him. He was absolutely gorgeous.

To his surprise, the guy started grinding on him again as Get Low came on. He went along with it, closing his eyes as he allowed his body to move against the other mans. A pair of warm lips suddenly connected with his and for a moment he forgot to breathe. When he finally came to his senses, he began moving his mouth against his. He slipped his tongue in the guy's mouth, hoping he was not about to get shoved away. He'd kissed plenty of guys while clubbing, but they often came to their senses and pulled away at this point.

A moan issued from the other man's throat and Harry pulled away, grabbing his hand and leading him into the bathroom instead. He locked the bathroom door behind them and hopped onto the sink. For the second time that night, he produced the little baggie of cocaine. He offered some to him and they poured a small amount in their hands, not even bothering to snort it through a dollar bill or something of the sort.

He made sure the baggie was safely in his pocket before grabbing him by his shirt collar and pulling him forward. "What's your name?" He asked.

"Evan."

Without bothering to answer, he pulled him even closer and crashed their lips together. Evan moaned into his mouth and he wrapped his legs around his waist. Evan lifted him off of the sink and slammed him into the wall, using his muscles to hold him up. He moaned as lips found their way to his neck and began sucking just below his left ear. His erection began throbbing in his pants and he could feel the other man's pressing against his thigh. He reached down and unbuttoned his pants, fumbling with the zipper for a moment. Pulling the man's hard length out, he began pumping it up and down in his hand. After a few minutes of this action, Evan finally hit his peak, crying out as his fluids shot out in thick bursts.

Harry felt himself sliding down to the ground as he was let go. Disappointed that the favor was not going to be returned, he turned to go, but was immediately slammed back against the wall again. Hands undid his pants in a past motion. He watched as Evan slowly lowered himself down. He wasn't going to do what he thought he was, was he?

His question was answered a moment later when he took him in his mouth. He cried out and thrust upward, never having experienced such a wonderful sensation in his life. Evan bobbed his head up and down in response, taking all of him in his mouth. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." Was the only thought he managed to get out. This was nothing compared to jerking off. This was fucking heaven.

Evan swirled his tongue around the head of his cock before taking him in his mouth once again. The pleasure was overwhelming and his mind went completely blank as his orgasm overtook him. He allowed himself to cum in Evan's mouth, only slightly embarrassed as the other man swallowed every drop of it.

"That was…wow." He said as they began fixing their pants and shirts. Evan only smirked at him before turning and exiting through the door. He took a moment to catch his breath and followed, looking around the room for his friends. He finally located Hanna and Megan sitting at a table by the door.

He made his way over and took a seat at the table, lighting a cigarette in the process.

"Who was THAT?" Hanna asked.

"Who was who?" He asked, feeling his words beginning to slur. Weighing only ninety five pounds, he was definitely a light weight. Three drinks plus the coke was a lot for him.

Megan slapped his arm as he picked up her drink and took a huge gulp. Uv Blue and Mountain Dew, one of his favorites. "Don't play stupid. I saw you two come out of the bathroom."

"That" He smirked "Was Evan."

"Um details. Now." Hanna demanded. He lit another cigarette and launched into the story.

After another three hours of dancing and drinking his ass off, the club was finally beginning to close. It was getting light out as Andy, Megan, Chad, Hanna, Matt, Amber, and himself all squeezed into the car and began driving back. He usually went home around this time, but he told them he'd just go back with them for a little while. He definitely needed to sober up.

They all entered the house and spread out across the living room except for Amber and Chad. They were both extremely drunk and had mysteriously disappeared into his room. Matt and Megan were busy arguing over what movie to watch and Hanna had ran into the bathroom looking as if she were going to puke. Meanwhile, Andy was sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table. He pulled out a tray and began rolling a few blunts. Harry lay across one of the couches, trying to keep his head from spinning.

"Valium or Xanex?" Andy asked, holding up a pill in each hand.

"Valium." Harry said. He hoped the pill would help him calm down so he could look presentable when he showed up at the Dursley's. Andy crushed the pill up and added it to the blunt before sealing it and taking a hit. It went around the room until it finally reached him. He sat up and sucked on it hard, holding the smoke in as he passed it over.

They smoked two more blunts and watched a Harold and Kumar movie. By this time, everybody was beginning to pass out with the exception of Amber and Chad, who were loudly having sex in the next room. He checked his watch and was shocked to see that it was almost nine in the morning. "I better get home." He said, standing up and only swaying a little bit.

"Want me to take you?" Andy offered. He nodded and put his shoes on.

"BYE AMBER! BYE CHAD! HAVE A NICE MORNING!" He screamed as he headed out the door. The loud noises stopped coming from the room immediately and everybody cracked up laughing.

As they drove to his house, Harry filled him in on what had happened in the bathroom earlier that night.

"That was the first time you did anything with a guy, right?" He asked, sounding weird.

"Yeah, why?" He asked.

Andy pulled the car to a stop at the end of the road. "Nothing." He said a little too quickly. Harry frowned. What was going on? He thought that he would be happy for him.

"See you tonight." He said, leaning in to give him a hug as usual. Andy hugged him back, quickly letting him go. He got out of the car and began walking toward number four, wondering what the hell that had been about. Andy hadn't seemed jealous or anything, just extremely disapproving. Oh well. He'd ask him about it later on if he remembered.

Harry walked into the house and quietly crept up the stairs, trying to go un-noticed. "Not so fast, boy!" His aunt's voice rang out from the living room.

"What?" He grumbled, not moving from his spot on the stairs.

"Somebody is here to see you." She spat out. He could tell by the tone of her voice that she meant a witch or wizard had entered the home. Shit. He had known they would be coming from him at some point, but he hadn't thought it would be this soon. Nor while he was in this state.

"Be there in a minute." He called back down the stairs. He knew that probably pissed her off even more, but he did not care. He sped into his room and grabbed a can of air freshener off of the ground, spraying himself to cover up the smell of cigarettes and weed. He quickly shuffled into the bathroom and brushed his teeth. His pupils were extremely dilated, but there was nothing he could do about that.

Praying they would not notice, he thundered back down the stairs and into the living room. "Sorry I took so long I-" He stopped talking abruptly as he looked straight into the eyes of his hated Potions professor, Snape. He had always had a way with luck.


	2. Chapter 2

Authors Note: Chapter one has been revised! I had two versions saved on my computer and I posted the wrong one. Sorry guyss!

"What the hell are you doing here?" He blurted out without thinking. He had assumed Dumbledore would be the one to come for him, or an Auror even. Anybody but Snape.

"Language, Potter!" Snape growled, shooting daggers at him. Harry stared back at him with an equal amount of disgust, not even bothering to apologize. He wasn't just done allowing the Dursley's to treat him like dirt. He was never going to let anybody walk all over him again, especially this man who had never said a nice thing to him in six years.

Snape stood and began moving toward the door. "Lead the way to your bedroom, Potter. I don't have all day, you know." Harry just continued to stare at him in extreme dislike for a long moment before leading the man up the stairs to his room.

He swung open the door and walked across the room to sit on his bed, which was actually just a mattress on the floor. He used to have a frame, but his uncle had broken it throwing him down onto the bed one night. "What in Salazar's name are you doing Potter? Get your trunk packed you insolent boy!"

Harry took a deep breath. "Professor, I need to talk to you about something." He looked up at Snape and was surprised to see a flicker of surprise pass over the other man's face before it was replaced with the same emotionless expression he always wore.

"Very well, Potter." He said, knocking the junk out of his rickety desk chair and sitting down. He looked around the room with a mixture of curiosity and disgust showing on his face. Never before had he been self- conscience about the way his bedroom looked, but he sure as hell was now.

The only pieces of furniture were the mattress on the floor, the desk chair, a wobbly old desk, and a small closet. He could hardly use the closet, as it was full of Dudley's broken possessions that he refused to part with. His clothes instead littered the floor, clean and dirty mixed together in large piles across the room. Magazines, newspapers, parchment, quills, and candy wrappers were thrown into the mix as well.

His desk was completely bare except for the i-pod and i-dock that Chad had stolen for him, a notebook and some pens, the picture of his parents, and a few lighters. On the wall above his desk, he had made a sort of collage of memories from this summer.

There was a picture of him and Andy, the ticket stubs to a rock concert the group had gone to one night, a ridiculous cartoon drawing of what was supposed to be Amber having an orgy with a group of guys, a picture of the night they had all temporarily dyed their hair pink, ticket stubs for two or three different movies they had seen, a sex coupon with his and Megan's names on it, a picture of himself and Hanna both passed out with permanent marker all over their bodies, a piece of notebook paper with a crazy song they had all made up during one of their drunken escapades, and his favorite, a giant group picture from a party at Andy's house.

These were all memories he wanted to hold onto forever. This was a life that he did not want to give up. These people were family to him. The Weasley's, Hermione, Sirius, Remus, Neville, and Luna were as well, but they got to see him eight months out of the year. He loved hanging out with them, but they were boring compared to his new friends.

He blushed as he realized that Snape was carefully studying the collage in front of him, his mouth moving as he read the words to the song they had made up.

"We are not a group of whores. We are not a group of whores. We are not a group of whores. BUT WE LIKE TO DO IT! We are not a group of whores. We are not a group of whores. We are not a group of whores. BUT WE LIKE TO DO IT! (Especially Amber!) Go and call your bitches, cause there's gonna be a party and we gonna get laid. We are not your whore's. BUT WE LIKE TO DO IT!"

It was a pretty lame song by any standard, but they had thought that they had managed to write a number one hit that night. He recalled how they had danced around the house singing it for hours. Now Snape was reading it and he might just die from embarrassment.

"Um, sir?" He cleared his throat, watching as Snape stopped reading and turned to face him. "I was wondering if I could just stay here for the rest of the summer?"

He waited for Snape to begin lecturing him about how ungrateful he was, about how he had taken time out of his day to come collect his ass, blah blah blah. What he was not expecting was what came out of his mouth next. "Why would you want to stay here, Potter?" Well, it looked as if Snape had finally realized the kind of life he had here. After years of accusing him of being nothing but a spoiled brat.

"Finally figured it out, have you?" He said coolly. "I'm not the pampered little prince who gets his every heart's desire. What a surprise."

Snape's eyes flashed angrily. "Speak to me like that again and I will make sure your life here becomes much worse." Harry said nothing, just glared at the man in front of him. He had never loathed another human being so much in his entire life, except maybe his uncle.

After what felt like an eternity, he finally stood. "I shall go speak to the headmaster about your request, Potter."

"I want to come." He said, standing as well. No way was he letting Snape go alone. He probably wouldn't even really go talk to the man.

"Very well, Potter. Take my arm."

Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise, but gripped the man's arm. Snape turned on his heel and they apparated, landing in front of a tiny house in the middle of nowhere. It was smaller than any home he had ever seen, aside from Hagrid's. The paint was peeling off of the sides of the house, the shutters were boarded up and rickety, and the grass had not been mowed in an extremely long time.

"This is where Dumbledore lives?" He asked in awe. Not because of the state of the house, but because he was surprised that Dumbledore was not staying at Hogwarts.

"Professor Dumbledore, Potter. And yes, teachers have a life outside of teaching you brainless idiots." Harry glared at him, but blushed a tiny bit just the same. He had assumed that the teachers stayed at the school year around.

They came to the door and Snape knocked. Not a moment later, the door swung open to reveal a house elf. "Professor Snape and Harry Potter are here master Dumbledore sirs!" The house elf called out as she led them into a sitting room.

As predicted, it was as shaggy as the outside of the house. The walls were lined with hundreds of books and the furniture was purple, of course. Harry admired how cozy the tiny sitting room looked, though. Dumbledore himself was sitting in a great armchair, reading the Daily Prophet and popping lemon drops into his mouth every few seconds.

"Thank you very much, Etha." Dumbledore said. The elf bowed deeply before disappearing through a door on the right without another word. House elves were so weird.

"Well, this is indeed a surprise Severus! I was under the impression that you were escorting Harry to the Weasley's."

"I had intended to, until Potter delivered a very surprising request. Very surprising indeed." He drawled

The two men turned to look at him and Harry knew that he was going to have to repeat his request to the headmaster. He assumed that Dumbledore would be happy with his request, as it would further strengthen the blood wards.

"Err..Sir. I was wondering if I could stay with the Dursley's for the rest of the summer. I love staying at the Weasley's, but I don't want to be a burden. The Dursley's have treated me a lot better this summer and I've been able to focus on my studies more." He was totally lying his ass of, but he couldn't very well admit the real reason why he didn't want to leave.

As was expected, the headmaster's eyes twinkled as he finished his story. "That's excellent news, my boy!" He said as he continued to excitedly pop lemon drops into his mouth. "It will be excellent for the wards as well as your academic performance. There is only one problem. Severus, have you told him anything yet?"

Harry turned his gaze to Snape, who he was surprised to see looked extremely uncomfortable. "No, headmaster. I was going to once we arrived at the Weasley's." Oh hell, what was it now? He had a feeling he wasn't going to like whatever news they were about to deliver to him.

"Ah, well you see Harry, I think this is a great idea, but the only problem is that it will interfere with your training schedule."

"Training schedule?" He asked. Why couldn't the old man just get to the point?

"A few times a week, Professor Snape was going to come to the Burrow to give you hourly lessons. He can't very well come to Private Drive and do the same….Hmm…I will allow you to spend the remainder of your summer at the Dursley's if you will agree to spend the last two weeks of the summer at Professor Snape's house, where he can then tutor you."

"WHAT!" Surprisingly, this outburst did not come from himself, but from Snape instead. "You are out of your mind, Albus. We will kill each other before the week is over!"

"We hate each other, Professor." He chimed in. There was no way in hell something like this could ever work out. Now that he knew Snape was on their side, he didn't loathe him as much as previous years, but he still didn't like the man. They were still constantly at one another's throats. Dumbledore would have to come scrape them both off of the floor at the end of the two weeks.

The crazy old man only chuckled in response. "It is settled then, you two will spend the last two weeks of the summer together in order to train. Severus, I trust that you will be there to collect him on the appropriate day?"

"Yes." He said through gritted teeth. The anger was even showing in his normally expressionless face. Harry had a feeling that he would love nothing more than to curse the man at that moment.

"It's all set in place then! I hope you have a good summer, Harry." He said, patting him on the shoulder.

Snape grabbed his arm and they apparated for the second time, landing back in his tiny bedroom.

"Are you sure you should not have been in Slytherin, Potter? Tell many more lies like that with a straight face and people will begin to wonder"

Harry stared up at Snape as if he had just lost his head. That was by far the largest sentence he had ever spoken to him and it wasn't even something rude! Was the man actually giving him a compliment or was he secretly making fun of him?

"I didn't lie-" He began.

"Nice try, Potter. If I am not mistaken, I would say your reason for staying has less to do with your studies and more on that." He said, pointing to the group picture.

As he studied it, Harry hoped that he would suddenly become blind and ignore the way everybody was holding a bottle of alcohol with their arm raised in the air, him included.

"They're my friends." He said simply.

"What of Granger and Weasley?" He asked. Harry was beginning to get annoyed. Since when did this man give a damn about his personal life? He was obviously attempting to make fun of him.

"I can have more than two friends, you know." He snapped.

Snape was suddenly inches away from him, giving him his signature glare. He opened his mouth to say something, no doubt a nasty remark. Before he could get whatever it was out, his expression suddenly changed into something unrecognizable. "What's wrong with your eyes Potter?" He asked, staring into his dilated pupils.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck! Of course Snape would notice! He had to think of a believable excuse quickly. "I'm just tired." He mumbled. He pulled himself away from the man's gaze and looked down at the ground, wishing he would just leave it alone already. He couldn't afford to have anybody find out about his drug usage. There was no way he'd be allowed to stay here then.

"Staying out all night does that to you."

"I wasn't out all night. I had just gone for a walk a little bit before you decided to show up." He argued. Truth was, he was perfectly fine with allowing Snape to think his eyes looked like that from no sleep. It was certainly better than the real reason.

Snape gave him a look that said "How stupid do you think I am?". "Show me to the door, Potter. I cannot tolerate to be in your presence for another second. My wand might accidently decide to curse you."

"My pleasure." He flung open the door and the two walked down the stairs, Harry pretty much running. As he reached the bottom, Aunt Petunia came flying out of the kitchen to see what was going on.

"What are you still doing here?" She asked nastily. Harry opened his mouth to reply, but closed it as she finished her sentence. "You were supposed to take the boy and leave." He stood there in shock, staring at his aunt. Never before had he heard her actually address a fellow Witch or Wizard before, she always pretended that they were not in the house.

"The boy is staying, Petunia." He spat out her name. Harry assumed he knew her first name from checking with Dumbledore before he had entered the house.

"I don't want him here, Snape. He is rude, disrespectful, and thinks he can do whatever he wants. He's also turned into a drunk, but you would know all about that, with your father being what he was and all. I can see right now that you've managed to turn out just like him. A pathetic loser who has nobody except for himself. A coward. " She spat right back at him.

His eyes widened in shock. Nobody had ever dared to speak to Snape that way for fear of being turned into a pile of watering mush on the ground. His aunt didn't even seem to care as she continued to mumble obscenities underneath her breath.

He turned to face Snape and was not surprised to see him on the verge of exploding. He knew very little about the man, but he would never forget what he had seen in the pensive last year. Snape had been bullied his entire life, changing him into the man he was today. He didn't tolerate shit from anybody, no matter who they were. That was the one and only thing that Harry respected about him.

His aunt's comment seemed to have affected him deeply. He had no idea what that had been about. It made it seem like she had known Snape when he was younger. That would be impossible, as his aunt wasn't a Witch. He was pretty sure she wasn't a Squib or anything either.

He recalled his Occlumency lessons from last year and the one time he had managed to invade Snape's mind. There was one image in particular that managed to stand out to him. A little boy sat crying in the corner as a man screamed at a crying woman. It all made sense now. Snape's father really had been a drunk.

He hated Snape, but even he could sympathize with him now. He even kind of understood his loathing for everything around him. It seemed like he had been through a lot in his life. Harry only knew a few things such as the fact that his father was a drunk, he had been bullied in school, he used to be a Death eater, and he was now a spy. Nobody should have to go through those things and he was pretty sure that wasn't even the half of it.

Snape was shaking with anger, his lips were pale white and thin. He could tell that he was only seconds away from whipping his wand out and murdering her on the spot. He turned back to his aunt and stared at her in disgust.

"I suggest you shut the fuck up right now. I don't know him that well, but I know him better than you do. He is brave and you are nothing but a coward who has no fucking life outside of pleasing your fat ass husband and your spoiled child. I have no idea how you possibly know anything about his past, but you have no right to bring it up if you do. Oh and he does have people other than himself. A hell of a lot more people than you do."

He was met with a hard slap across the face as he finished his little speech. He didn't even react as he stumbled backward and felt someone catch him. He was too shocked to speak or hit back. His aunt had not touched him in years.

He suddenly became aware of the fact that it was Snape who had caught him as he almost fell. That it was Snape who had just witnessed the altercation with his aunt. That it was Snape who he had just defended. That was all it took for him to shove past his aunt and bolt up the stairs.

He was embarrassed beyond words that his aunt had hit him in front of his asshole of a Potions teacher. He would probably get made fun of for the rest of his life now.

He closed the door behind him and started throwing things at the wall. When that didn't do the trick, he sent his fist flying at the nearest wall. It made a loud crack and his hand began throbbing in pain. Despite the pain, he felt great. This was the best way to relieve his built up anger without resorting to measures that would award him a lifelong stay in Azkaban. He continued to pound the wall, no longer caring what was going on around him.

He was suddenly grabbed from behind and pulled away from the wall. He looked up and of course it was Snape who had pulled him away. He was suddenly angry at the man for stopping him. He raised his fist to begin pounding at the wall again, but it was seized rather harshly this time. In a fast motion, Snape had managed to toss him down on his bed. This made him snap back into his senses completely.

He looked to see that he had made a huge hole in the wall and his knuckles were bleeding a little. "Fuck." He exclaimed, burying his head in his hands. He didn't want this man to see him weak like this. He didn't want anybody to see him like this, but Snape was much worse. This story would probably circulate around the school at the beginning of the year. As if he didn't already have enough on his plate.

"That was foolish, Potter." Snape said quietly. He said nothing, unable to keep his emotions under control at the moment. A long moment passed without a single sound being uttered. "Give me your hand."

He looked up and slowly held out his hand, trusting the man not to further injure him. He heard a loud crack and a second later his hand was mended. Snape mumbled another spell to take care of the dried blood on his hand. His knuckles were still busted up and a bruise was forming, but he didn't care about that.

"I will return on the fourteenth of August. Be ready so I do not dramatically injure your aunt. If you wish to leave early, just send a message along to somebody in the Order. Somebody will come collect you."

With that, he strode from the room without another word. Harry stared after him, in complete shock over the day's events. He badly wanted to know how his aunt knew Snape, but he didn't want to face her ever again after what had just happened.

He sighed and lay back on his bed to catch up on some much needed sleep. Before he drifted off, he turned to look at where he had just made the hole in the wall. It was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

The next month passed by in a complete blur. His uncle continued to beat him every chance he got and his aunt had grown so used to his behavior that she didn't even bother to scream at him anymore. Even stranger than that, Dudley and him had come to a sort of truce over the past few weeks.

Harry had been standing behind the Dursley's tool shed smoking a joint when Dudley had stumbled upon him. He had been prepared to pull out his wand and threaten the life out of him until he had noticed the lit cigarette in the other boy's hand.

They would now stand behind the shed and smoke together during the day. They never really discussed the magical world or what went on inside their home. Don't ask questions. It was a sort of unspoken rule in the household. That's why Harry had been surprised one day when Dudley had begun questioning him.

"So why haven't the frea-your people come to get you yet?" He'd asked uncomfortably. He raised an eyebrow at his cousin's question. He had caught onto the fact that Dudley had almost called them freaks, but he had also caught onto the fact that he had stopped himself from doing so.

"Because I told them I wanted to stay here." He shrugged, sucking on the end of the blunt they had rolled together.

Harry passed the blunt over to Dudley. "Why the hell would you do that?" He looked at him as if he had two heads. Smoke escaped his lips as he began to talk again. "I mean damn. I would want to get as far away from here as possible if I were you. They've always treated you like shit and I admit that I was a part of that, but it's different now. You really aren't that bad, you know?"

He just shrugged, completely uncomfortable with the conversation by now. He had never talked about the abuse with anyone. He wasn't about to start now. It just brought back painful memories. Dudley must have sensed this because he quickly changed the subject. "Sooo…is that guy who drives that shitty red car your boyfriend?"

Harry had chosen that moment to take a huge hit. His eyes widened and he promptly began coughing all over the place. What did he know? Who had told him, if anyone? He had no idea how the other boy could have even found out that he was gay. Also, when had he seen Andy drop him off?

"I-what- how do you know-that's-what the fuck-I mean-" He sputtered, unable to lace together a coherent sentence.

To his irritation, Dudley just began laughing. "It was just a guess. And an accurate one at that." He said.

Harry lit a cigarette before beginning to speak again "He's not my boyfriend, but I am gay." He said. He took a drag from his cigarette, averting his eyes from his cousin. This was the first person aside from his new friends that he had told he was gay. It probably wasn't going to end well.

"Well no shit."

He was taken aback at his cousin's answer. Not only did he seem okay with the idea, he seemed to have already known somehow. "How did you...?"

"It's really obvious, just look at yourself."

He had demanded to know how he looked gay, but Dudley had refused to say anymore. He hated to admit it, but he might just miss his cousin a little bit when he left. He was skeptical to go back to the Wizarding World anyways. He had a feeling he had pissed everybody off by staying here for the summer. He hadn't received a single letter in three weeks.

Ron hadn't been stupid enough to believe his lame excuse about focusing on his studies for a second. He had told him he was a liar and that he hardly knew him anymore. He had also accused him of "having a girl". Harry had laughed his ass off at that one. Some of it had to do with the pot he had smoked earlier that day, but it was the irony of the statement that had killed him.

He had received one letter from Hermione since it had been announced that he wasn't going to the Burrow for the summer. It was a howler, actually. She had shrieked at him that there was no way he was focusing on his studies because he was Harry Potter and had demanded to know whatever the hell he was doing at the Dursley's. He hadn't heard from her or anyone else since.

He was still partying nearly every night and sleeping all day. When he wasn't sleeping or partying, he spent the majority of his time in a drugged out daze. The rare occasions when the group went to the cinema or to a concert were the only exceptions of this.

He was becoming more sexually confident as time passed by and he'd had oral sex with three other guys since the night with that Evan guy. One of them had wanted more, but he wasn't ready to go there. He still had his sense of morals and he wanted his first time to be something special, not a drunken fuck in a public bathroom.

Before he knew it, it was July 30th, the day before his sixteenth birthday. The whole group was throwing a huge party that night, followed by a night out at the club on his actual birthday. He had already packed his overnight bag and he didn't give a damn about the punishment he would receive when he returned home. It would be totally worth it.

Not only was this a birthday party, it was also his going away party. Dumbledore had sent him a letter last week to tell him that Sirius wanted him to spend the first two weeks of August with him before he had to go stay with Snape. He was reluctant to leave his friends, but he hadn't seen Sirius since January and he missed his Godfather dearly. Somebody would be by to collect him on the first of August. He had been partying his ass off ever since the news had been delivered.

At half past seven that night, he headed down the stairs with his bag slung over his shoulder. He wondered what his aunt and uncle were going to say. Over the past month, he had not bothered to come home many times, but he had never actually informed them that he was going to spend the night somewhere.

He walked into the kitchen to find his aunt cooking as usual. "I'm leaving. I'll be back the day after tomorrow. That's when someone is coming to get me." His aunt didn't even acknowledge that she'd heard him as she stirred the chili cooking on the stove.

"Going there to celebrate your birthday, I assume."

He dropped his jaw a little at her words. He hadn't even known that she knew when his birthday was. They never acknowledged his birthday and he had known completely used to this fact. "You know when my birthday is?" He asked.

She turned away from the stove to stare down at him, a strange expression on her face. "Yes. Why wouldn't I?"

"Because you hate me." He blurted out. It had just slipped out of his mouth without thinking, but he didn't regret it. She had hated him for fifteen years. They all had. If it were up to them, he wouldn't even be alive right now. He wasn't stupid.

He suddenly found himself slammed against the counter and pinned down. "Is that what you think?" She hissed. "That's why I took you in, gave you clothes to wear, and fed you. That's why I tried to keep you away from that nonsense for ten years. So you didn't end up like your parents. I hated my sister. I hated her for what she was. I hated her for marrying that awful boy. I hated her for these things, but most of all I hated her for leaving and going to that school. I loved your mother you insolent boy. We grew up together, the best of friends. I feel the same about you as I did her. I hate the lifestyle you both chose, but family is family. You will learn that one day."

With that, she turned and stormed out of the room without another word. Harry stood very still, processing everything she had just said to him. She loved him, but she still treated him like this. She still allowed her husband to beat him every chance he got. She had starved him and locked him in his room for years. He wished she hated him.

He grabbed his bag and bolted out the front door, ignoring his uncles yelling. He ran until he was out of sight from the house. He stopped and pulled the tiny bit of cocaine he had left out of his pocket, snorting it all in his open palm. He tossed the empty bag to the ground and lit a cigarette.

Walking the thirteen blocks to Andy's house, he was able to calm down completely by the time he arrived. He actually had a pretty good high going and it wasn't even party time yet.

When he walked in, he only spotted Andy standing in the living room. He was glad for this as he couldn't stand to be around anybody else just yet. "Hey" He said lamely, flopping down on the couch. Andy frowned and came over to sit next to him.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

He sighed deeply, not really sure if he wanted to talk about it. "My family." He mumbled before launching into the story about what had happened. He left out some of the details, as Andy didn't know he was a Wizard. It made the story pretty hard to follow when he did so. He was considering just telling his best friend who he was and where he came from.

"I don't really understand-" Andy began, but he cut him off by holding up his hand.

"There is...there's something I need to tell you. When I do...you can't freak out...you can't tell anybody...and you can't accuse me of lying." He said. Andy was looking at him curiously, but nodded his head in response. "I'm not going back to boarding school early. Actually, I'm not going back to boarding school at all. I'm going back to Hogwarts which is...a school of magic. You see, I'm a wizard." He finished and looked up.

As expected, Andy was staring at him as if he were crazy. "Prove it." He challenged. Harry sighed and stood up. He knew that the other man was going to ask that and he was going to seem like a liar if he couldn't do so.

"I can't." He said. Andy raised an eyebrow and smirked, thinking the whole thing was a joke. "I'm not allowed to use magic outside of school until I turn seventeen. Only in the case of an emergency is it permitted. I have something that might prove it, though." He dug around in his pockets and pulled out his invisibility cloak.

Andy looked as if he might laugh at him any moment. He pulled it over his entire body, leaving only his head visible. He laughed out loud as Andy's expression turned into shock and he dropped the cigarette he had been holding onto the couch cushions. He had a lot of explaining to do.

An hour later, he had finished telling Andy all about the magical world and people were staring to arrive for the party. Most of them brought gifts with them, even though he had told them not to. Despite this fact, he was itching to open them and he did so as soon as the last people arrived.

Matt had gotten him a huge bag of weed along with an unbreakable glass bong of his own.

Hanna got him two pairs of tight, ripped up, skinny jeans and a Jersey Shore shirt,

Amber got him a few pairs of underwear with dirty sayings on them, a stack of gay porn magazines, and a purple V-neck shirt that said "Nice Guys Finish First".

Megan got him a huge framed picture of the entire group, a pair of leather boots, and a lip ring as they were planning on piercing his lip that night.

Chad had presented him with a duffel bag full of his favorite kinds of alcohol. He had spotted Nikolai, Uv Blue, and Bacardi 151 just on the top layer.

Britney gave him a carton of cigarettes and a really cool lighter.

Faith got him Buddhist prayer beads and an oil burner with different scents of oil.

James got him a shot glass and a cup that said "I'm so gay I can't even drink straight" and a zebra print V-neck.

Heather got him a Bob Marley poster that had a huge pot leaf on it

Brian got him a huge bag of cocaine, which he slipped to him in secret.

All that was left was Andy's present, which he promised would come later. He grumbled in response to this. Harry then went around and thanked everybody for their gifts. He packed them into a huge bag and set the bag in Andy's room, out of the way of the party.

It was fifteen minutes to midnight and the party was in full swing. Harry had been drunk for hours at this point and was currently locked in the bathroom with Megan, Hanna, and Faith.

They were seconds away from piercing his lip, which probably wasn't a good idea considering how trashed they all were. "Okay, ready?" Faith asked. She was a professional piercer and had volunteered to do it. He nodded and she began counting. "One, two, three." On three, she shoved the needle through the inside of his lip. He winced in pain as he felt it come out through the other side. She took the needle out and quickly slipped the hoop into his lip. He felt her twisting the ends on and wiping the blood from his face.

Scared of what he would see, he didn't bother to look in the mirror as they returned to the party. He headed over to the beer pong table where Andy currently was. "Look at my lip." He slurred as Andy turned to look at it. He examined it for a moment before smirking.

"Don't go having oral for a while unless you want that thing to fall off." He said.

Harry smiled and made a waving gesture with his hand. He was about to join the game of beer pong when everybody began counting down. "10, 9, 8," He realized that they were counting down until his birthday. "7, 6" Everybody began to gather around him. "5, 4, 3." A shot glass was shoved in his hand. "2, 1" He downed the shot as everybody began to drunkenly sing happy birthday to him.

When it was over, Andy grabbed his hand and led him into his bedroom. He saw two wrapped presents sitting on the bed and wondered if they were for him. Andy shut the door behind them and gestured at him to open his presents.

The first one he picked up was extremely heavy and he almost dropped it in his drunken state. It took a minute, but he finally unwrapped it, gasping at what was inside. It was a silver laptop, a really expensive looking one at that. He looked back up at the other man. "So we can still talk while you're off in your own little world." He said. Harry smiled broadly and began thanking him repeatedly.

Andy dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "Open your other one now." He said. Harry excitedly ripped the paper off of the second tiny package. Something fell out and hit the floor with a clank. He looked down and was surprised to find that it was a medium sized gold key. It was attached to a key chain with a peace sign on it.

"What's this for?" He asked. He picked the key up and began examining it closely. Nobody had ever given him a key to anything before.

"Megan, Chad, and I felt as if you should have it. It's a key to the house. We want you to know that you're always welcome here, no matter what happens in your life." Andy said.

Harry felt tears stinging the corners of his eyes as he continued to stare at the little key. It meant more to him than words could say. Nobody had ever given him a key to their home before. Nobody had ever accepted him into their life like this. Nobody had ever cared enough. These people had become his family over the past few months. They were there for him when no one else was. They accepted him for who he was. They had never judged him, nor attempted to change him. He couldn't go to anybody else for his problems and nobody else understood him.

He suddenly hated being a Wizard. He had always been different and for the first time in his entire life he was normal. That was all about to go away in less than forty eight hours. In less than forty eight hours he would be back in the Wizarding World. Where he was a hero and everybody knew everything about him. Where people felt sorry for him because of his parents and everybody expected him to save the world. This was the one place where he got away from that and it was about to be taken away from him.

He pulled Andy into a huge hug, promising himself he would not cry. Andy hugged him back with much force. "We'll always be best friends, promise." He said in an attempt to comfort him. He pulled away and got control of himself. "Come on." He said, pulling Andy up from the bed. "Let's go party."


	4. Chapter 4

Harry had a terrible hangover the next morning. No, terrible didn't even begin to describe it. It was as if he had been hit by a truck full of bricks. It was as if he had been pushed off of a mountaintop and rolled down a hill. Every muscle in his body ached. It took all he had not to vomit all over the floor as he rolled out from between Andy and Hanna.

His head was pounding as he stumbled throughout the house in search of a drink. He walked into the kitchen, keeping his eyes shut tight like a blind man. He felt around in the cabinet, finally locating a clean glass. He filled it with tap water and drained its contents.

Eyes still closed to shut out the horrid light; he stumbled as he turned to go back to bed. He honestly had no idea how he was going to go to the club later when he was this hung-over.

"Graceful as ever, Potter." He jumped about a mile as a voice sounded from behind him. He turned to see none other than Snape sitting at the kitchen table with an amused expression on his face. What the hell was he doing here? Nobody was supposed to come for him until tomorrow. Maybe his high still hadn't worn off from the acid he had done last night. He shut his eyes tight and re-opened them again. The man wasn't going away.

"What the hell! What are you doing here?" He exclaimed.

Snape leaned back in his chair and smirked up at him. "I was instructed to come get you one day early. I presume that your dog father wanted to see you on your birthday. When I arrived at your house you were not there. Your cousin kindly gave me directions to this wonderful place." He sneered, looking around the house in disgust.

He didn't even want to know how Dudley knew this was where he was staying. He was pissed that Snape had come to get him a day early. He had plans for tonight. Plans that didn't involve being completely sober and sitting inside Grimmauld place with Sirius.

He suddenly became completely aware of his surroundings. Not only was he not at home "focusing on his studies", but he was standing inside Andy's house talking to Snape. Andy's house where they had just thrown a massive party last night. Andy's house where there were people currently passed out on every piece of furniture in sight. Andy's house where liquor bottles were practically coating the floors.

He had also just realized that he was standing there wearing nothing except a pair of boxers with cartoon characters on them. Even worse, his shirtless torso was completely covered in marker. He vaguely remembered playing a game last night. Everybody had been forced to do nasty dares. If you refused, somebody got to draw whatever they wanted on the person's chest. He was obviously more of a prude than he had realized.

"I'll just…Uh…go get dressed now." He mumbled.

"What a fantastic idea. I applaud you, Mr. Potter," Snape mocked.

Harry moved too quickly and ended up dry heaving over the sink. He was grateful that nothing was coming up, but he didn't know how he was supposed to go see Sirius looking like this. Or apparate. The thought of apparation nearly made him run to the sink again.

He made to push his way past Snape into the living room, but an arm stopped him. A small phial was thrust in his face. He stared at the dark green substance suspiciously. "Just drink it, Potter. You'll need it once we arrive." He still didn't take the phial.

"What do you mean I'll need it once we arrive?" He repeated.

"You did not hear this from me, but they are all throwing you a surprise birthday party of some sort. We can't have the Golden Boy vomiting at his own birthday party, now can we? " He grabbed the phial and downed it in one gulp. Almost instantly, his hangover was gone. He didn't even have time to be shocked over the fact that Snape had just helped him or that he hadn't scolded him for drinking.

He hurried out of the kitchen and back into Andy's room. The others were still sleeping as he began to get ready. Ten minutes later, he was fully dressed and ready. He had chosen to wear a pair of the skinny jeans Hanna got gotten him. They were extremely tight and light colored with rips in every place imaginable. He slipped on his leather boots from Megan and the LMFAO V-neck shirt he had bought at a concert last month.

Finally, he added a thick layer of eyeliner to his bottom lids, applied foundation, and blow dried his hair. He slipped his glasses on, eyeing them in disgust. He was planning on getting somebody to fix his eyesight as soon as he got back. He picked his bags up and slowly began his walk to the kitchen, taking in as much of his surroundings as he could before he left. He wouldn't see this place until Christmas at the very least.

He set his bags in front of Snape's feet with a thud. Looking up, he caught Snape checking out his new appearance. He braced himself for a rude comment of some sort, but it never came.

The other man merely raised an eyebrow and shrank his bags. Harry put them in his pocket and they left through the front door. They had barely made it down the front walk when the door opened behind them.

"Harry!" Andy called out to him.

He stopped walking abruptly, causing Snape to nearly run into him. "Inconsiderate brat." He heard him mumble under his breath. Harry paid the other man no attention as Andy began walking over to them.

"Hey. I have to leave a day early. They have some kind of birthday surprise party planned for me. I'm sorry I didn't wake you, I didn't want to bother you."

He watched as Andy's face fell. "Oh…well…I guess this is goodbye."

He felt his eyes filling with tears as the other boy pulled him into a tight embrace. "I'll contact you as soon as I can and I promise I'll be back to see you during one of our breaks." Andy nodded and kissed his cheek.

A few moments later, the door closed behind him. He felt Snape grab his arm and he that familiar tug as they apparated. After what felt like hours of getting squeezed through a giant tube, they finally reappeared in London. They were standing in what appeared to be a deserted alleyway in the middle of town. He had assumed they would appear directly outside of Grimmauld place, but he was grateful for the walk so he didn't complain.

"You really should take that hideous thing out of your lip, Potter." Snape said, breaking the silence that had taken over the moment they had begun walking to Sirius's.

"Why?"

"Have you so much as looked in the mirror today? It' is badly infected." Harry merely just shrugged at this bit of information. He had assumed it would be infected after coming into contact with alcohol, cigarettes, and god knows what else last night.

"If you want to succumb to an early death, then be my guest. Maybe I will finally get some peace and quiet in my life." He didn't even respond to Snape's ridiculous comment, rolling his eyes deep in the back of his head instead. He highly doubted that he was going to die from a tiny infection. He had some Muggle antibiotics in his trunk. He would put them on his lip later on.

After continuing to walk for what felt like hours, they finally came to a stop in between numbers eleven and thirteen. He closed his eyes, concentrating hard. It was annoying to go through this process every single time one came over, but Grimmauld place was the most well hidden building in London. The door finally appeared. He was halfway up the steps when he managed to trip. He fell back down on his ass, hard.

He heard a snicker from in front of him and he looked up to see Snape looking highly amused at his pain. "Shall we just place a bubble around you?"

"Git." Harry glared up at him. He picked himself up from the ground and they walked into the house together. He accidently let the door slam shut behind him. The wretched portrait of Sirius's mother began screaming as if on cue.

"HOW DARE YOU! BRINGING THAT FILTH INTO MY HOME! MY ONLY LIVING SON BESMIRCHING THE BLACK NAME! DO YOU HEAR ME YOU LITTLE-"

They hurried away from the hallway and into the kitchen. Just as he had been told, they all jumped out at him and yelled. " Surprise!" He felt himself smiling despite all that had went down between them this summer. These people would always be family to him.

Mrs. Weasley was there in a second, smothering him in her overbearing arms and asking him how his summer had been. She seemed to have forgiven him for not coming sooner at least. He hugged her back, ignoring her usual comments about how skinny he was.

She had just released him when Hermione and Ron appeared. They eyed each other for a long moment before Hermione came forward and hugged him. "How was your summer?" She asked, pulling away from him and scanning his appearance. He caught sight of her eyeing his completely new appearance. When he actually took a second to scan the room, he found a lot of people doing the same.

"It was good." He replied. She seemed to accept this answer and they chatted for a few more moments before she excused herself to go talk to somebody else. It was just Ron and himself now. They were awkwardly standing in front of each other. He was waiting for Ron to break the silence and he had a strong feeling that Ron was waiting for him to do the same.

"Alright, mate?" Ron finally asked as he moved forward to hug him as well. Nothing else was said between the two, but he knew by his best friend's words that he was forgiven. Harry made up a few lies about his summer while Ron complained about how boring his had been. Their conversation was somewhat strained and Harry realized why as he watched Ron walk off to join Hermione at the table. They didn't really have anything in common anymore.

The twins sought him out a moment later. "Don't worry about our dear brother over there." Fred said.

"Yeah, he's just mad because he was stuck inside all summer while you were out having a good time." George observed.

"I wasn't-" He began to defend himself, but was shushed by George.

"You do realize who it is that you are talking to, right?" Fred asked. "We pick up on everything. So tell us, what exactly were you doing all summer?"

He was about to cave and tell them all about his new friends when he spotted Remus walking toward the group. "Later." He mouthed as the man got closer. The twins nodded and walked off in the opposite direction.

"Harry!" He smiled as he was pulled into a hug by the man he considered to be his second godfather. "Did you have a good summer? The Muggles treat you okay?" Harry nodded at his questions, making up a few new lies about what he had done with his summer.

Their conversation was interrupted by Snape coming over to the group. He pulled a still steaming phial out of his pocket. "Here." He said, thrusting the potion into Remus's hand. Harry watched as Remus downed the whole thing in one gulp, blanching at the horrid taste. He recognized it to be the Wolfsbane potion he took in the week leading up to the full moon.

Remus walked away after that, leaving him completely alone with his Potions professor. Harry paid him no attention, though. He had begun looking around the room for the one man he wanted to see the most. He hadn't been in the kitchen when he arrived, which was odd considering it was his house they were all celebrating in.

"The dog is behind you, Potter." Snape's voice suddenly mumbled from his left. He turned around to see Sirius just entering the room.

"Sirius!" He yelled, barely aware of the way he sprinted across the kitchen to catch his godfather in a bone shattering hug. People turned to smile at the pair as they embraced for several long moments. They broke apart and he caught Sirius's eyes sweeping over his new appearance, finally settling on his new piercing.

He really hoped that Sirius wouldn't choose this moment to start acting as the parental figure he was supposed to be. He wasn't taking his new piercing out no matter what anybody said, but he still didn't want to argue with anybody on his birthday.

"A lip ring, eh?"

Harry smiled and the two began chatting away.

The next two hours were devoted to his telling of fake accounts of his summer to everybody that bothered to ask. It was starting to get extremely irritating and he needed some sort of toxin in his system. He was finally able to pull away, muttering an excuse about going upstairs to unpack his belongings.

He headed to the room he usually shared with Ron, but would now be his own for the next two weeks. He took his bags out of his pocket. Pulling out his wand, he tapped it against his bags until they returned to their normal size. Technically, he wasn't allowed to do magic, but they wouldn't be able to detect it so he really didn't care.

He pulled out a bottle of vodka and took three huge gulps from the bottle, blanching as his throat began to burn. He slipped it back in the duffel bag that was carrying his alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, lighters, and bong. He then shrank it down to the size of a matchbox car and slipped it back in his pocket. No way was he letting it out of his sight.

He fumbled in his pockets for the joint he had stashed there a few hours ago. He pulled it out and lit it, inhaling hard on the end. The smoke filled his lungs in an instant. He held it in for a decent amount of time before breathing it out through his nose. He was beginning to feel that familiar light headedness as he finished his joint and slipped the tiny butt back in his pocket.

He sprayed himself with a can of air freshener sitting on the night table and thundered back down the stairs to rejoin the party.


	5. Chapter 5

The party was finally beginning to wind down an hour and a half later. Nearly everybody had left and he was now sitting at the kitchen table with Tonks, Remus, Sirius, Fred, George, and Snape, looking at all of his presents.

He had received a few interesting looking defense books from Hermione, the usual tin of rock cakes from Hagrid, a case that went over his wand to protect it from breaking from Moody, a bag of stink bombs from Dung, an enchanted Quiddich board game from Ginny, a huge bag of puking pastilles and such from Fred and George, a bag of lemon drops from an unknown sender(he could not help rolling his eyes and smiling at this), a handful of quills that did neat things from Dean, an enchanted comb from Bill and Fleur, a box full of foreign sweets from Charlie, a pair of weird goggle things from Luna, a Chudley Canyons t-shirt from Ron, a knife that would unlock any lock from Remus, a Weird Sisters t-shirt from Tonks, and a Remembrall from Neville.

Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had gotten him a set of expensive looking cologne and a large collage to put pictures in. The collage had the word family at the top of it in huge black letters. About twenty pictures total could fit into it. He couldn't wait to begin putting pictures in it, but he had wondered how he was going to do that without a Wizards camera.

His problem had been solved when he had opened his gift from Sirius to discover that it was a Wizards camera. The sneaky prat must have corresponded with the Weasley's on the gift.

Snape had not given him a gift, but that had been completely expected.

He tuned back into the conversation to hear Tonks and Fred loudly arguing over Quiddich. Remus and Sirius had disappeared into the other room a few minutes ago and he was surprised to find Snape chuckling along with George at Dungs vulgar jokes.

They all jumped as a door slammed loudly. Sirius came striding back into the kitchen, looking extremely pissed off. It was pretty obvious that he had been fighting with Remus over something, but nobody dared to ask at the look on his face

He headed over to the cabinet and pulled out an un-opened bottle of Firewhiskey. He watched as he pulled out enough shot glasses for each of them and passed them out. He didn't even bother to slam the last one down in front of Snape, which was extremely odd considering how pissed off he already was.

He had learned earlier that day that the two men still didn't like each other very much, but they tolerated each other's presence and could have the occasional civil conversation. Also, Snape was apparently staying here for the time being. Something about his new house not being safe enough for anybody to stay at. Protection wards had been placed around the building, but it would take a bit longer for them to go into effect.

Sirius passed the bottle around and everybody poured their own shots. He caught Snape looking as he filled his up to the brim, but he glared right back at him, daring him to say a word. They all raised their glasses and clinked together, not really sure what they were toasting.

They went through one more round of shots before Harry could not stand the way Snape kept watching him anymore. He noticed that Fred had left the table as well and was heading up the stairs, probably to use the bathroom. He rushed up the stairs and caught up with him. "Come with me." He mumbled. Fred shot him a questioning look, but followed him nonetheless.

Once they were both safely inside, he pulled out his wand and cast a locking charm on the door in case somebody was rude enough to burst in without knocking first. He un-shrank the bag he was currently carrying in his pocket and sat down on the bed with it. "Can you keep a secret?" He asked.

"Absolutely" Fred nodded and came to sit next to him.

Harry believed him so he unzipped the bag and pulled out a few bottles, holding them up for Fred to see. "Holy shit! Where'd you get all that?" He gasped

Harry smirked up at him. "This summer." He unscrewed the lid of a bottle of Uv Blue and gulped some down.

"Hmm…I think it's about time you tell me the real story." He said, motioning for Harry to pass the bottle over.

It took a little over an hour for Harry to give him all the details of his summer. When Harry had gotten to the part about being gay, he had stopped talking for a moment to glance over at Fred. He had just given him a confused look and motioned at him to carry on with it. He had found another person to accept him.

He had also found out a lot of things about Hogwarts that he never known about before. He didn't know why, but he had assumed that he was the only one there who drank or did drugs. Fred had disproved this assumption by telling him stories of what he had done over the years. Apparently there was a hidden room close to the kitchens where parties would take place nearly every single weekend. House loyalties did not matter there as they were all there to do one thing: Get fucked up.

It was a completely secret process, as they would all be in a shit load of trouble if they were ever discovered. Fred had explained that the room would only appear to you if your name was added to a secret list. It was some complicated spell that a smart Ravenclaw had worked out a few years back. Anybody who attended these parties swore to absolute secrecy. It sounded fantastic.

They were extremely tipsy as they headed back downstairs to see what had happened in their absence. He entered the kitchen to find George, Snape, and Sirius alone at the table. The bottle of Firewhiskey was nearly gone by now and none of them looked too sober.

"Harry!" Sirius called the moment he spotted him. "Come sit by me!" He patted the empty chair next to him. "Wanna shot?"

"Black." Snape growled in warning.

Sirius turned to him and pointed his finger near his face. "Shut it, Snape." He slurred out. "He is my godson and if I say he can drink, then he can drink."

"Yeah, Snape." He agreed in his extremely buzzed state. He completely missed the death glare Snape gave him at his words.

Fred and George must have seen a fight of some sort coming on because they quickly stood to go. Sirius stumbled from his chair to escort them to the door, leaving him alone with Snape who was glaring at him after his comment.

"You do not need any more alcohol, Potter."

"You don't need any more either." He said, picking up the bottle to pour a shot.

"I am a grown man." Snape shot back, taking the bottle from his hands before he could pour.

"So?" He questioned, not really getting the point. He plucked the bottle back out of his Potion Masters hands and took a swig from the bottle. There were only two sips left so he finished it and stood.

"You got your fair share of drinking this summer, I would say." Snape's voice called out as he rummaged around in the pantry for more alcohol. He found a small bottle of mead and stared at it curiously. He had never tried anything like it before. He shrugged and shut the pantry light out, coming back to the table with the bottle.

He had just downed a huge shot when Sirius came stumbling back into the room. "What do you think you're doing?"

Harry looked up from pouring another shot. Sirius was not staring at Snape as he had expected, but himself instead. "You said you didn't care if I drank." He said, completely confused now. It was as if he'd had a complete personality change in the ten minutes he had been out of the room.

"I don't give a flying fuck what you do. You can go get drunk and sleep in the street for all the fucks I give, but you are not going to drink MY liquor." He jerked the bottle from his hand and began chugging from the bottle.

He sat there in complete shock, staring at Sirius as if he had never seen him in his life. Sirius had never treated him like this before. He was being a downright asshole. He knew it was because of the alcohol. Hanging out with Alex and the rest of his friends had been a blast all summer, but there had been a few times when fights had broken out due to the alcohol. People got scary when they were drunk and angry.

"I..I didn't…What…" He stuttered, not even knowing what to say. He cast a glance over at Snape to see him staring back in forth between the two. He had dropped his mask of coldness and was watching the exchange in complete shock.

"I…I didn't…What?" Sirius mocked him. "Are you mentally fucking retarded, Harry? I know the Muggles don't treat you right, but have they made you incapable of stringing two sentences together? Or should I take care of that?" He said, slamming the bottle down on the table and moving toward him, his hand raised in the air.

Harry wasn't even shocked or annoyed anymore. He was downright fucking scared. Sirius was acting like he was going to hit him any second. The Wizarding world was the one place he could escape from physical abuse. Sure, he had a madman who wanted to murder him, but he never had to worry about being physically harmed.

"Stop. I'm sorry." He said in a feeble voice. If it were anybody else, he would be picking a fight, but this was Sirius. His godfather. His only remaining family member. He was supposed to love him and care for him, not beat the fuck out of him like his uncle.

"Black!" A sharp voice halted Sirius's advances.

For the first time in his entire life, Harry was glad that Snape was around. He had stood from the table and was pointing his wand right at Sirius, as if daring him to touch him. Harry had seen Snape mad plenty of times, but he had only seen him furious on one other occasion. It had been right after he had been caught looking inside his Penseive. He recalled the way Snapes lips had formed into a thin line, his skin turned pale, and his body trembling. Snape looked like that right now. As if he was barely controlling himself from snapping Sirius's neck in half.

"Fuck off, Snivellus." In an extremely fast motion, Sirius picked up the bottle and flung it in Harry's direction. He ducked as the bottle went exploding over his head. He ran out of the room as another bottle exploded close to him. He went out the front door without looking back behind him. He didn't know or care where he was going to go. Anywhere would be better than this place.


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: This chapter is in Snape's POV. I've only written in Harrys POV so far, but I will probably start writing in Snape's every few chapters when I feel that it's important to the story. Severus is going to be a little OOC in this chapter, but remember that he's been drinking. Oh & I want to think all the people who have left reviews for this story! You guys are amazing3

Disclaimer: Anything you recognize does not belong to me.

Severus stared around the room in shock at what had just occurred. He knew he should probably go chase after Potter, but the boy needed time to calm down and he needed time to sober up before attempting to walk the streets of London.

He also needed time to have a word or two with Black. What Black had done and said was completely uncalled for. He was upset, drunk, and pissed off. He had taken it out on Potter in his drunken state. If the two would have been alone, things probably would have escalated even further. He couldn't remember a recent time when he was as pissed off as he was now.

Not that he would ever in a million years admit it, but his view of Potter had changed drastically over the summer. He had always seen him as a carbon copy of his father. He had thought him an arrogant and spoiled little child. This was clearly not the case. He was abused by those Muggles, no doubt about it.

He had spoken to Albus about this after seeing his aunt slap him in the face, but he had denied that the boy was in any real danger from being there. When he had actually had time to think about it, he had recalled how skinny the boy was at the start of term every year. He also realized that the boy never removed his shirt as he recalled seeing him swimming in the black lake fully clothed.

The thought of anybody abusing a child made him sick. His father had done it to him and he wouldn't wish that on even his worst enemy. He imagined what Lily would say if she could see the way her son had been treated by her own sister and her husband.

Severus also recalled how Potter had stood up for him that day. How he had stood up for his snarky Potions professor who had done nothing but treat him like shit for six years straight. Right then was how he knew that he was nothing like James Potter. Actually, that was a lie. He had realized that he was nothing like his father after he had kept his mouth shut about what he had seen in the Penseive last year, but had refused to believe it until now.

He watched as Black strode from the room, but he followed right after him. No way was he leaving him unsupervised or allowing him to get away from what was about to come at him. Just as predicted, Black made to shut himself in his bedroom, unaware that Severus had been following closely behind. He caught the door in his hand. Black flung himself face down on the bed and he was surprised to hear sobbing coming from the man.

He didn't like Black one bit, but he had always respected how he kept his emotions in control.

"Have you completely lost your mind?" He asked, wincing at the way his words slurred.

The sobs ceased almost immediately and he heard a mumbled "Sod off, Snape."

He closed the door behind him and sat down on the edge of the bed, looking around the tiny room. He had been living here for the past month, but he had never stepped foot inside Black's bedroom before. It was one of the tiniest bedrooms he had seen in the house and he wondered why he didn't relocate to one of the larger, unused rooms in the house.

There was a tiny wardrobe in the right corner of the room. The doors were un-opened and most of the clothing was thrown in the bottom of the closet instead of hung up on the hangers. Old textbooks, a cauldron, and other miscellaneous items littered the top shelf.

There was a small writing desk that looked like it had scarcely been used. Newspapers and parchment completely covered the surface. A single photo frame sat on the desk, but it appeared to be empty. At a closer glace, he realized it was not empty. A spell had been placed on it to conceal the real photograph from everybody except the caster. He could easily break through the spell if he wanted to, but he figured now was not the best time to do so.

His eyes landed on a spot directly over his headboard. Hanging there was a photograph of the four Marauders during their Hogwarts days. Pettigrew and Lupin were smiling at the camera while Black and Potter were making vulgar gestures at it. The other photograph was of Black and Potter on his wedding day. He looked away as a red haired woman entered the frame. He had spent too many years grieving over her and he was not about to start again.

Severus instead allowed his attention to return to Black. He had sat up in the bed and was studying him curiously. He felt his face heat up a tiny bit at being caught looking at the photos. "I miss him every fucking day." He mumbled and he was annoyed to see that the tears had started up again.

"You need to pull yourself together, Black. What you just did to your godson was inexcusable. Just because you are extremely intoxicated due to the fact that you are fighting with your little friend Lupin does not mean you can behave in this way. I have lost any amount of respect that I have managed to build up for you during the past month."

He finished his lecture and waited for Black to say something back. He was pleased to discover that Black was having trouble choosing his words. He would start to say something, but change his mind at the last moment.

"Remus is not my friend." Severus gave a sarcastic snort at these words. Was Black really that angry over their little spat that he was claiming they were not friends anymore after nearly twenty five years of friendship?

"Feeling a bit childish today, are we?"

Black sat up straighter and shook his head. "No, Remus has not been my friend for six months." Severus got the feeling that he was missing something crucial. Black pulled his wand out of his robes and pointed it at the photo frame on the desk, muttering a spell underneath his breath. Severus glanced over at the photo and almost passed out at what he saw.

Black was sitting in an armchair with Lupin in his lap. Even worse, Blacks arms were wrapped around Lupins waist. They were both laughing at the camera and at the last second, Lupin leaned up to kiss the other man on the lips. They were gay? He would have NEVER suspected.

At least now he understood why their fight had upset Black so much.

"We were supposed to tell a few people today, but at the last moment he freaked out. Tonks is the only one that even knows we're together. We got in a huge fight and I told him not to talk to me anymore. I'm sick of hiding things. I've been in love with him for years and now that he finally returns the feelings, he wants to keep it a secret. I don-"

Black had paused midsentence and was now staring at Severus in complete horror. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I don't know why I just told you…now everybody is going to find out the wrong way and you will have something else to throw back in my face. Fuck."

Severus rolled his eyes at Blacks annoying rambling. The imbecile really did not need to consume alcohol. He couldn't really talk because he was slightly drunk as well, but he knew how to control himself. He also wanted to hit Black for thinking he would make fun of him for his sexual orientation. He could be a complete hypocrite for doing so, as he was gay himself.

For the longest time he had convinced himself that he was straight, but after a while it became apparent that he was attracted to men. Sure, he enjoyed sex with women, but that didn't count. Sex was sex. Gender plays no part in that. What matters is the sex that you are emotionally attracted to. The sex you could imagine yourself falling in love with.

He had tried relationships with both sexes and the only thing the women had done were satisfy his physical desires. Lily had been the only exception of this and he figured it mostly had to do with the fact that she was there for him when nobody else was.

He felt himself growing emotional as he thought of her and began cursing himself for consuming so much alcohol. He glanced over to see Black still completely freaking out. He thought about allowing him to think that he was going to ruin his life with this new bit of information, but even he was not that cruel.

"Bla-Sirius." He forced the man's first name out of his mouth in hopes it would attract his attention. Sure enough, Black ceased his ramblings at once and whipped his head around to stare up at him in complete shock. "I do not like you. I doubt I ever will. I tolerate you for The Orders sake. With that being said, I would never make fun of you for your sexual orientation. You see, I am gay myself. Hardly anybody knows this so if you keep your mouth shut, so will I."

Black stared at him in shock for a long moment before nodding. "Harry probably hates me." He mumbled into his hands.

"He doesn't hate you, but I won't try to stop him from hexing you when he comes back. What the hell were you thinking? Potter has been abused by those horrible Muggles and then you threaten to beat him as well? You don't need to be drinking in front of him like this, either. I have no proof, but I strongly believe that the boy has turned into an alcoholic over the summer."

Potter thought he had everybody fooled, but he saw right through everything. He was trying to get past all of the hurt in his life by resorting to substance abuse. Potter was well aware that Severus knew of his drinking, but he had no idea of his other suspicions that he was using illegal drugs to get high with.

He had no proof, but he intended to get it in some way. If it turned out to just be Marijuana, then Severus would not do anything because he was a casual pot smoker himself. Truthfully, he didn't consider weed to be a drug because it was a natural substance that grew in the ground. If he got wind of Potter doing any other drug, well he would not have a life for a very long time if Severus could help it.

"Alcoholic?" Black repeated

Severus sighed deeply. "We will further discuss this tomorrow when I am sure that you will be able to remember everything I'm saying. You need to sober up and I need to go find Potter. I'm not going to attempt to order you around because I know it will have no effect on you, but I strongly suggest you stay out of sight when we come back in."

Severus stood and left the room, stumbling a little as he did so. He transfigured his clothing into a pair of khaki shorts, a pair of sandals, and a simple black t-shirt before opening the front door and setting out to find the boy. He hoped Potter had not strayed too far away. He wasn't in the mood to chase a sixteen year old all over London.

He didn't have to search too hard. As he turned the corner at the end of the block, he spotted the boy sitting on the steps of an abandoned building. He had what looked like a portable Muggle computer perched on his knees and appeared to be talking to himself. As Severus got nearer, he realized that a voice was talking back to him.

"-need to stop drinking, Harry. I don't know about Wizards, but us regular people can get alcohol poisoning from drinking too much. I'm sure your godfather didn't mean what he said. Please stop."

Potter looked up at him as he reached the top step. He didn't even acknowledge his presence, just went back to his computer. Severus took a seat next to him and glanced over at the screen. There was an image of the boy that had come out of the house to hug him on the screen. He assumed a picture of Potter was showing up to the boy as well.

He watched as Potter picked up something from between his legs and swigged it. "Harry, seriously!" The voice from the computer exclaimed. Severus looked closer and recognized it to be a half pint of vodka. He had drunk half of the bottle in addition to the Firewhiskey and whatever he had consumed upstairs with Weasley. He decided to take matters into his own hands.

He grabbed the computer thing from the boy, despite his feeble attempts to snatch it back. The boy on the screen looked at him curiously. "I am a friend of Mr. Potters. I assure you he IS going to stop drinking in the next two seconds and he's going to be fine."

"Alright…thanks. Have him contact me tomorrow so I know he's alright" The boy said.

Severus nodded and not a moment later his picture disappeared. He took the computer and set it on the step next to him, not knowing how to shut it off. He turned to Potter and grabbed the bottle from in between his legs before he had a chance to protest. It took a moment, but Potter finally realized what he had just done.

"Give it back!" He yelled.

"No." Severus said simply. He was not scared or intimidated by the boy. He could throw as big of a fit as he wanted. He wasn't giving it back. "You will get alcohol poisoning if you keep drinking."

"Good! I don't care!" Potter yelled back, fumbling around in his pockets for something.

Severus let out a sigh of frustration. "You could die, do you not-"

"DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND, SNAPE! I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF I LIVE ANYMORE. EVERY FUCKING MEMBER OF MY FAMILY HATES ME AND WANTS TO HURT ME. I CAUSE EVERYBODY SO MANY PROBLEMS WITH BEING THE BOY WHO FUCKING LIVED OR WHATEVER! DON'T YOU DARE PRETEND FOR A SECOND THAT YOU DON'T HATE HAVING TO LOOK OUT FOR ME ALL THE TIME! I DON'T DESRVE TO LIVE! I AM THE REASON THIS WAR HAS STARTED AGAIN! I AM THE REASON CEDRIC DIGGORY IS FUCKING DEAD! RON AND HERMIONE ARE HARDLY MY FRIENDS ANYMORE AND I DON'T BLAME THEM! I AM NOTHING COMPARED TO EVERYBODY ELSE!"

The boy had tears streaming down his face as he finished his screaming fit. Severus had not said a word through all of this, just let the boy voice his frustrations. He was appalled to learn the way he viewed himself. He blamed himself for the war and all of the deaths that came along with it. He had never been so wrong in his entire life.

"I don't wish you were dead." He said quietly.

Potter snorted through his tears and produced a tiny box from the inside of his pocket. He put it up to his lips and Severus realized that it was a cigarette. He was not going to scold him for smoking considering the breakdown he was currently having. Hell, he could even go for a cigarette at this point.

He jerked the pack out of his hands, ignoring the noise of protest that came from him. He pulled one of the cigarettes out before tossing the pack back onto his lap. He motioned for a lighter, noting the way Potter was gaping at him in shock as he handed it over. He lit his cigarette and took a long drag before speaking again.

"I am serious, Potter. There are very few people who I wish to be dead and you are not one of them. It has indeed upset my life to have to look after you all of the time, but that is none of your concern. I could very easily say no, but I do not. While I cannot speak for your Muggle relatives, Black does not hate you. He loves you very much and he knows his actions tonight were inexcusable. You are not the reason for this war. It would have happened anyway when the Dark Lord made himself known again. All you did was speed up the starting of the war, which is not entirely a bad thing. You cannot blame yourself for every bad thing that has happened." Severus finished speaking and took a sip from the bottle he had just taken from Potter.

Potter nodded and finished the last of his cigarette. Severus took another swallow from the bottle before pocketing it and taking a drag of his still lit cigarette. He stood and handed the computer contraption to Potter. "Can you shrink it for me?" He slurred out. He shrank it and put it in his own pocket for safe keeping.

"Are you ready to go back now?" He asked.

Potter nodded and stood up, but lost his balance immediately. Severus grabbed ahold of him and began to escort him back to Grimmauld place, head spinning with the nights events.


	7. Chapter 7

Authors Note: Omg guys! I am sooo sorry that it has taken me forever to get a new chapter out! I've been extremely busy lately and when I haven't been, I've had a severe case of writers block. Thanks to a free day and a bowl or two, I was able to write this chapter last night. I know there is not a lot going on in this chapter, but it was needed in the story, so bare with me. Next chapter will be way better. There just may be some Snarry action finally.

Disclaimer: Anything you recognize does not belong to me.

Harry groaned as he felt someone attempting to shake him awake. He had a pounding headache and did not want to face either of the two men in the house after what had gone down last night. He vaguely remembered allowing Snape to escort him back inside of the house and put him to bed after his little breakdown.

"Mmmm" He grumbled, attempting to bury his face back down into the pillows.

The blankets were ripped away from him and he yelped loudly as a voice shouted "Up, Potter! We have things to do today." Groaning, he sat up and looked around rather groggily.

Snape was hovering at the end of his bed, already fully dressed in a pair of black trousers and a dark green sweater. He actually looked kind of good when he wasn't hiding behind all of those massive black robe-wait. What in the hell did he just think? This was Snape he was talking about. His mean, old, bitter, greasy haired Potions professor who hated him. He shook his head from side to side, attempting to clear away the thought completely.

Snape cleared his throat rather loudly and gave him a pointed look. Rolling his eyes, he swung his legs over the bed, standing up fully and squeezing his eyes shut tight. His head felt like it was going to explode. It was pure fucking agony. He wondered if Snape was going to offer him some hangover potion, but after a few moments of them standing in complete silence, it became apparent that he wasn't.

"Can I have some hangover potion?" Normally, his pride would not have allowed him to ask for assistance from his snarky professor, but his head hurt so bad that he no longer cared.

"Can I have some hangover potion what, Potter?"

"Can I have some hangover potion, please." Harry said through gritted teeth, wishing nothing more than to hex the man into obliviation.

Snape smirked at him in satisfaction as he plunged his hand inside of his robes and pulled out the small vial. He handed it over and Harry downed the entire thing in one gulp. The pounding inside of his head ceased within seconds and he felt good as new again.

He handed the vial back to Snape and looked down, blushing as he realized that he was in only his boxers with his embarrassing torso showing again. He blushed even further as he caught Snape examining it.

After a long, hot shower, Harry padded back into his bedroom, keeping a towel tied around his waist. He emptied his bag out onto his bed. The clothes all tumbled out at once, leaving a huge heap on the bed. He sorted through the piles slowly, attempting to find something decent to wear. He wanted to look good when they went into Muggle London. There was no telling when he would run into a cute boy.

He had smoked nearly an entire joint before he finally had a decent outfit put together. His pants were simple, dark colored, skinny jeans. He was wearing a pair of black Toms with them as well. He slipped on a plain white v-neck and a tight, black vest that he had picked up at a vintage thrift store in Surrey.

Digging through his pile of gifts from last night, he located his magical comb. He messed with it for a few minutes, trying out various hairstyles on himself. When he was finally done, his hair was completely straightened down flat and grown out to the middle of his ears. The back was slightly longer, coming down to the middle of his neck.

His bangs remained straight, while the back spiked up. To finish his transformation, he added three stripes of lime green to his bangs. He put the tiny roach his joint had turned into back into his bag, shrank it, and slipped it back into his pocket. He then pulled his glasses off of his face, pointed his wand at his eyes, and muttered "Occulus Reparo". He blinked and his vision was better than it had been even with glasses. He wondered how many years he had missed out on all of the little details he was now noticing in the room for the very first time.

Harry dabbed some anti-biotic cream onto his extremely infected lip before glancing over at the clock. It had been close to an hour and a half since Snape had woken him up and told him to get ready. He was surprised that the man had yet to come scream at him for wasting his precious time. Harry thundered down the stairs and into the kitchen. As predicted, Snape was standing at the end of the long table. His hands were on his hips and he was glaring at him.

He had to try with all of his might to fight back the gigantic bubble of laughter inside of his throat as he realized that Snape reminded him exactly of Molly Weasley at that moment.

As hard as he tried, he was unable to contain his laughter the more Snape glowered down at him. It was just too fucking funny.

Snape didn't speak again until he managed to calm himself down. "Now that your ridiculous laughing fit is over, sit down and eat your breakfast. Quickly, if I may add. You took so long in the shower that I assumed you had managed to drown yourself, but unfortunately, my wishes have not been fufilled."

Harry rolled his eyes at his professor's ridiculous antics before turning to sit down at the table. For the very first time since he had entered the room, he noticed Sirius sitting at the kitchen table, looking completely miserable.

"I'm not hungry." He said automatically turning to leave. He was prevented from doing so when a hand went to his chest. It was strong, yet comforting. Gentle, but firm.

"Sit down, Potter. You WILL eat something if I have to force feed it down your throat."

He jerked away as his brain processed that Snape was the one touching him. He attempted a half-hearted glare, but he was actually just trying to hide his feelings about last night. Sure, he was angry, but he was also hurt beyond belief.

Sirius was the only family he had left and his actions spoke loud and clear. He didn't give a damn about him either. The only difference was that he didn't beat him or starve him to death. He would not have put it past the man to do both of those things last night in his drunken stupor.

"Accio." He mumbled, pointing his wand at the plate of toast sitting on the table. He could have easily walked around the table to get it, but he didn't want to have to walk past Sirius if he didn't have to. Maybe he was being stupid and childish, but he didn't give a damn.

The toast flew into his hand and he took a tiny bite for Snape's sake. He wasn't even hungry, but he knew he would never hear the end of it if he didn't at least eat something. Snape looked at him with an expression that almost looked sympathetic for a moment before nodding at him to come on.

"Harry, wait!" Sirius scraped back his chair and stood. Harry ignored the man, walked throughout the house, put his shoes on, and made to follow Snape out of the open front door. He whipped around when a strong hand grasped his left shoulder. "Don't fucking touch me!" He spat. Seconds before he fled the scene, he saw how pained Sirius looked, but whatever. He brought it upon himself.

Harry stopped running once he got around the corner. Fumbling in his pockets for a moment, he pulled out his cigarettes and a green lighter. The nicotine instantly calmed his nerves and he leaned back against the building, breathing deeply. Snape appeared not a moment later and looked surprised to find him standing there as if nothing had ever happened. Well, what had he been expecting? For him to run off and sob on a street corner? Harry blushed at his own thoughts as he reclalled the previous night and how he had done exactly that.

The two men began walking throughout Muggle London in cmoplete silence. Harry took puffs of his cigarette every few seconds, taking in his surroundings. Snape, on the otheer hand, was trying to hurry him along and kept looking around wildly. He rolled his eyes at the mans behavior too many times to count. It wasn't as if Death Eaters were just going to be parading down the middle of the street in broad daylight. Even they had more brains than that.

A girl walking down the road caught his attention. She had bright pink hair and was wearing a Sex Pistols tank top. She looked oddly familiar. He turned around to stare at her retreating back before realizing that he didn't know her at all. She just looked a lot like a girl that had partied with them at the club all summer long.

"Not very descrete, are we?" He didn't even have to look up. He could feel Snape smirking down at him.

Harry couldn't help but snort as he realized that Snape assumed he had been checking the girl out. "There was absolutely nothing to be descrete about." He said truthfully.

"Whatever you say, Potter."

"I'm serious." He said, beginning to get extremely annoyed at the mans incorrect assumptions.

"Okay, you win." Snape said, holding up his hands in mock defense. They walked thr rest of the way in silence, finally entering the Leaky Cauldron.

"Professor Snape, Harry!" Tom the barman exclaimed as they walked through the door. "Can I get you a drink, Professor? And you Harry? Promise I won't tell anyone." He said with a wink.

He opened his mouth to accept the invitation, but was cut off by Snape.

"No thank you, we're just passing through."

Tom's face fell and Harry offered him an apologetic smile as he followed Snape out of the Leaky Cauldron and into Diagon Alley.

They walked throughout the familiar alley until they reached Gringotts. Harry made to open the door, but Snape gestured at him to sit down on the steps instead. Frowning in complete confusion, he did as he was told without questioning it for once.

A thick envelope was thrust into his hands and he recognized to be his Hogwarts letter. It was extremely thick, which was unusual. His eyes widened as he realized the reason for its thickness. This would contain his O.W.L results. Fucking hell.

He ripped the envelope open before he lost his nerve. He closed his eyes for a moment before shakily opening the first piece of paper that had fallen out.

"ORDINARY WIZARDING LEVEL RESULTS"

Astronomy: O

Care of Magical Creatures: E

Charms: E

Defense Against The Dark Arts: O

Divination: T

Herbology: E

History of Magic: A

Potions: O

Transfiguration: O

He stared at the piece of partchment in shock for a full minute. Not only had he gotten eight O.W.L's, but he had gotten four outstandings! Even in Potions! He had done better than he had thought he would.

Harry looked up to find Snape studying him curiously. He knew that the man wished to know his results, but that his pride would never allow him to ask. He silently handed the paper over, carefully watching Snape's face as he took in the words on the parchment. Snape's eyes grew wide, but he quickly masked into his usual expression.

The paper was handed back to him and he stuffed it inside of his robes.

"How the hell did you get an O in Potions, Potter?"

"I guess I'm not as stupid as you thought." He snapped back "Or my family." He muttered underneath his breath so lowly that he didn't think anybody would be able to hear him.

He was surprised as Snape lay a hand on his shoulder and left it there. Their eyes connected and they stared at one another intently for a moment. "I never thought you were stupid, Potter. Just lacking in motivation and common sense. While I did not think you would score highly in Potions, I am not surprised at your Defense grade. As much as I loath to admit it, you're rather bright. Don't ever allow your family to tell you otherwise." Snape finished speaking and Harry looked up, meeting the mans gaze. They stared into one anothers eyes intently for a long moment before he broke the gaze and unfolded the second part of his letter.

"Dear Mr. Potter, this letter contains your book list based on the career choice you made at the end of last school year. If your ambition is no longer to be an Auror, arrangements for your classes will be made on the first day of term. "

Advanced Potion Making

Confronting the Faceless

Transfiguration: Sixth Addition

The Standard Book of Spells: Grade 6

Magical Herbs and Fungi

Charming the Charmable

He finished reading and tucked the list back into his robes, making a mental note to talk to a worker once they got to Florish and Blott's.

One hour later, Harry and Snape were inside of the bookstore, grabbing all of the necessary books. Snape had picked up a book on Myths & Omens becoming strangely engrossed in it. Harry left him to his reading and walked around to the other side of the shelf.

"Excuse me" He called out to the storekeeper. "Can you tell me where the N.E.W.T. book for Astronomy is located at?"

"Ah, yes. They're right over here." The man replied, leading the way to the aisle that Snape was currently occupying. He pulled out a dark blue book from the second shelf. He had sworn he had just looked at that section earlier. Oh well, he must have overlooked it.

"Thanks." He replied, taking the book and beginning to flip through the pages.

After he paid for his books, they made a stop in Madame Malkins Dress Shop. He had grown so much over the summer that his school robes now hung above his ankles. He was now sitting in a chair at the front of the shop, being poked and prodded everywhere imaginable.

The assistant that was fitting him was obviously new and was taking an eternity to take his measurements. He probably could have done it faster with no experience. Snape was apparently thinking the same thing too as he tapped his foot impatiently and muttered obscenities under his breath every single time the woman was out of earshot. "Fucking troll." Was the newest one that he had heard and he was currently doing everything in his power to keep a straight face.

A loud sigh emitted from across the room and he turned to look at Snape. "Don't you have an errand or something to do, Snape."

"Indeed. Once we are finished here."

Harry huffed impatiently "Look, I am not a child. It won't kill you to leave me alone for an hour or two. Go do whatever while I do this and I'll meet you at the Leaky Cauldron in two hours."

"Fine. " Snape finally agreed. He hadn't expected him to give in. He must really want to get the hell out of the shop. "I have to run to the Apothecary. Meet me in an hour and a half in the front of the store. Don't get into any trouble and don't run into Muggle London."

He rolled his eyes and waved the man out of the door. He was thrown another warning glare before the door closed and he was left alone with the ditz of a woman.

Surprisingly, it only took her twenty minutes to completely finish with him. She seemed to have began moving a little bit faster once Snape had left. He seemed to have that effect on people. He was an intimidating man and he had seen both man and women, teacher and student alike shrivel back at his prescence.

He paid for his robes and left the shop, hoping he would have enough time to go where he had been planning. Harry came to a stop in front of a large archway. Looking around quickly to make sure he wasn't being watched, he stepped through into Knockturn Alley.


	8. Chapter 8

The Alley was just as creepy as it had been when he had accidently turned up here in his second year. Unlike Diagon Alley, it wasn't full of life and cheery people. Every single building was painted dark grey or black. Nobody halfway normal lingered to chat in the streets and no music blared from the shops. It was eerily quiet instead. He felt extremely out of place and uncomfortable as he searched around for an unoccupied, out of the way spot while ignoring the old hag calling out to him on his left.

After walking for about five minutes, he located what looked to be an un-used side street with a few concrete slabs and a dumpster in it. Broken pieces of wood littered the ground and there were smashed alcohol bottles everywhere. Not exactly the best place, but it would do for the moment.

He took a seat on one of the concrete slabs and un-shrank his duffel bag. He pulled out his new bong. He knew it was stupid to use it in such a public place, but he had not gotten the chance to use it yet and he really wanted a good high, not the little buzz he had gotten from smoking the joint a few hours ago.

He filled the bowl up with two different kinds of weed. One was supposed to be Mango Kush and the other was the Dro he usually smoked when he got high. He was excited to try the new kind, as he had heard that it was some really good shit and that it tasted amazing.

He pulled out his lighter and clicked the button downward, making the flame appear. He placed his hand over the hole in the side and lit the bowl, sucking as hard as he could.

After a moment, he pulled the stem up and sucked the smoke into his mouth until his lungs were practically bursting. Harry was only able to hold it into his mouth for a few moments before having to release it due to the violent coughing fit that came next. His eyes were watering and he felt like he could vomit any moment due to how hard he was coughing. This shit was strong as hell.

"Potter?" Came a surprised voice from his right side. Fuck. He had been caught smoking. And even worse, he had been caught smoking by Draco Malfoy. He would know that snotty little voice anywhere. Only, Malfoy hadn't sounded snotty for once in his life, only shocked.

Harry sighed deeply. "What do you want?" He didn't even care if Malfoy went and told the entire world(not that anybody would believe him), he just wanted him to leave him alone. He wasn't in any mood to pick a fight today. He just wanted to get high and then go do some shopping before he had to meet Snape at the Apothecary.

Malfoy took a few steps closer to him, fully coming into view. Harry was surprised to see him wearing a Muggle sweater and a pair of blue jeans instead of his trademark cashmere button down coats and black dress pants. He actually looked like a normal teenager for once in his life.

He watched as Malfoys eyes took in his new appearance and he suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable. His friends and family judging him was one thing, but his worst enemy judging him was another thing.

"Since when do you have style?" He sat gaping at the other boy for a moment before shrugging and bending down to light the bong again. No point in attempting to conceal what he was doing now that he had been caught in the act.

Just as he took a huge hit and the smoke began to fill up his lungs, he felt Malfoy sink down beside him on the piece of concrete. Thankfully, he barely coughed this time and was able to get a pretty good hit. He set the bong back down in front of him, but it was snatched up in a second.

"Hey-" He began to protest, but was cut off.

"Is this shit any good?"

Harry raised an eyebrow. Malfoy smoked? Well, that was news. He didn't know why he was even a little bit surprised. Maybe it was because he always tried to appear to be so classy and classy people didn't do things like smoke pot or get piss drunk. No, they got perfect grades and ate gourmet food and became filthy rich. He didn't comment on this new revelation, though. He just nodded his head and passed the lighter over.

They sat together smoking for at least twenty minutes. They didn't really talk and when they did it was to insult one another, but not with any real malice compared to usual. It wasn't awkward, it was just strange.

He didn't know why he was sitting here doing this with his sworn enemy. Malfoy had gone out of his way to torment him throughout the years and he had done the same as well. They could hardly hold a civil conversation, yet they could do this together without questioning it.

Maybe it was because they suddenly had something in common that the rest of the world didn't know about. Harry found that he didn't really mind the other boy so much when he wasn't surrounded by his peers. They seemed to fuel his fire more than anything.

He was done holding grudges anyways. If somebody was nice to him, he would be nice back. If somebody was an ass to him, he would be an ass back. It was as simple as that.

"What are you doing down here, anyways? Shouldn't you be at the joke shop with Weasel and Granger or something?" Malfoy asked as he began to put the bong away.

"I could ask you the same. Shouldn't you be hanging around tormenting first years with fat and fatter?"

"I was going to make a trip to the tattoo shop, if you must know. And I only hang around with Crab and Goyle because our parents are friends and because they can scare people into doing anything. They are terrible company, honestly."

Harry raised his eyebrow at Malfoys admittance about his so called friends and tried not to laugh at the thought of the pampered little prince getting a tattoo.

"I need to buy new body jewelry. And while we are being honest, I barely know Hermione and Ron anymore. We have been out of touch all summer. I only just returned from my Aunt and Uncle's house yesterday. They are staying at the Burrow and I am staying…elsewhere."

He had almost said that he was staying with Sirius, which would have been very bad indeed. Malfoy may not be acting like his usual jerk self, but his parents were Death Eaters. Harry knew that just because they were bad did not mean that Malfoy was, but there was a pretty good chance that he could go report everything he said back to his parents who would in turn report to Voldemort.

Shit. He really had been an idiot for sitting here talking to the other boy. He needed to get back to Diagon Alley as soon as possible before a pack of Death Eaters came searching for him. But first, he would play it cool and accompany Malfoy to the tattoo shop.

He knew where the little shop was from the time he had snuck in with Fred while the rest of the family had been Christmas shopping. Neither of the two had actually gotten a tattoo or a piercing, but they had both checked out the different tattoos that were available and laughed at the crazy looking people who came in.

They entered the shop and Harry walked straight to the counter as he didn't know where anything was located. "Excuse me." The clerk turned to glare at him as if he was about to steal something or cause a scene. That's what he got for being a teenager. "Can you tell me where your nipple rings are?"

Nobody except for Andy and Megan knew that he had gotten his nipples pierced at this sketchy looking tattoo shop over the summer. He had used a fake id that said he was over eighteen and gotten them done for forty dollars. He had just bought some new rings last month, but the ball had fallen off of one of them so he needed to get another pair.

The clerk pointed to a glass case across the room and he made his way over. Malfoy had apparently followed him, his jaw practically on the floor. "You have your-your-" He pointed at his chest area.

He nodded, not even bothering to conceal his laughter at the boys shock. He looked around the shop to make sure nobody else was watching them before lifting his shirt up. Malfoys eyes widened as he stared at the little blue hoops hanging from each nipple.

Harry chuckled again before turning back to the case. After staring at the different options for five minutes, he finally decided on two plain black bars. They were sexy without being overdone and they would not show through his t-shirt, thankfully.

He paid and waited for Malfoy to ask the clerk about his tattoo, but he appeared to have chickened out. "Scardey cat." Harry teased him as they made their way out of Knockturn Alley.

"Sod off, Potter."

They walked the rest of the way in silence, not exactly sure what to talk about. Harry was still nervous that Malfoys being nice to him was somehow a trap and he was thankful when they reached the Apothecary. Snape was standing outside waiting and Harry cursed himself as he remembered that Snape had his Death Eater image to keep up with.

"Hello, Professor Snape." He said, trying to play it cool.

Snape looked confused for a moment before noticing whom he had been walking with. "Potter, Malfoy. Well, this is a surprise. Up to some sort of trouble now, I presume."

"We were just talking Professor. Well, I gotta get going. See you at school, Potter." He said, ducking into the Apothecary.

Harry and Snape waited until he had disappeared from view before beginning to walk again. They kept at least a five foot distance and didn't speak a word until they had entered the Alleyway that led into the Leaky Cauldron once more.

Before he even had time to react, he found himself slammed up against the wall and a potion poured down his throat. He gagged and tried to spit whatever it was out, but Snape firmly held his jaw closed, forcing him to either swallow the potion or choke to death.

"Are you Harry Potter?"

"Yes." He answered truthfully, thankful to feel Snape's grip loosening on him.

"What were you doing with Draco Malfoy earlier today? How did you run into him?"

He did not want to tell Snape, but he found that he really had no choice. His mouth seemed to be moving on its own accord. That asshole had given himVeritaserum against his will.

"He caught me smoking in Knockturn Alley. We went to the tattoo shop together."

Snape's eyes bugged out and he slammed him up against the wall again, so close to him that there was no room in between them now.

For some odd reason, Harry found that he was having trouble thinking at the feel of his body pressed against his. But no, he was being ridiculous! This was Snape, not some hot guy from a club!

"What were you smoking? Meth? Heroine? Crack?"

"Weed." He managed to choke out as the man's grip just kept getting tighter and tighter on his shoulders. It hurt extremely badly due to the cuts and bruises that were already there from his uncle. He tried his hardest not to show that he was in pain, as he did not want Snape to become curious and discover his marks.

The other man's face fell and Harry was surprised to see that he looked a little embarrassed. "Oh. Well...that was extremely foolish of you! Malfoys parents are Death Eaters! Did it ever occur to you that he could be gathering information to be passed onto the Dark Lord!"

"That's exactly what I thought after a while, but I had to play along for a bit longer, didn't I? Look, it's all over now and Voldemort has not showed up yet, so let's just forget it! And let me go!" He finally demanded.

Snape glanced down to where he had him in a death grip, instantly letting go. "Did I hurt you?" He said rather quietly. Was he actually concerned?

"Yes." Harry said. Damn that Veritaerum! "But it's fine." He just wanted to get the hell out of here and go...Well, he didn't know where he wanted to go. Definitely not Grimmauld place.

He turned to go into the Leaky Cauldron, but Snape stopped him. "Let me see." He said, attempting to pull his shirt sleeve up. Harry slapped his hand away, trying to wiggle free.

"No. I told you, it's fine."

"Potter, stop being so childish."

He tried to fight the other man's hands off of him, but he was too strong. His t-shirt was pulled up to reveal his cut and bruised shoulders. There was a sharp intake of breath from his right.

"Who did this to you?" Snape said and Harry could hear the anger in his voice even as he looked down at the ground, knowing the potion would make him answer whether he liked it or not.

"My uncle."

Snape curled his hand into a fist, closing his eyes and staying silent for a long moment.

"How long has he been doing it for?"

"Since I was three or four, but it's been worse this summer."

"For what reason?" Snape said through gritted teeth.

"Before it was because I was a freak and a waste of space. This summer it got worse because according to him, I'm a nasty little faggot who has no regard for the rules." Harry said, completely hating Snape for forcing him to take that potion.

While he had never blatantly admitted anything to his uncle, he'd had his suspicions about his sexuality and because of this he was beat more often and even harder for being not only a freak, but a "nasty little cock sucker" as well.

"Are you even gay, Potter."

"Yes, I am."

God damnit! He hated Snape for making him take this potion. Yes, he was open about his sexuality and would have told the same answer if he wasn't being forced to, but he still felt as if it was a complete violation of his privacy. It should have been his decision to tell the truth in the end, not the stupid potions!

"Now, are you done questioning me or would you like to invade my fucking privacy some more. Come on Snape, ask me any little question you wanna know!"

"Shit." He heard Snape mumble under his breath as he stared at the ground for a moment. "Pot-Harry, I apologize. I forgot about the Potion and wouldn't have asked that question if I would have remembered. It should be your choice whether you wish to come out or not."

Hmm, strange. Snape didn't seem to care that he was gay. He had assumed that this would be another thing for the asshole to torment with when he was feeling extra prick like that day. That and he had assumed that Snape would make fun of him for the abuse as well, or at least say that he had done something in order to deserve it. This was strange indeed.

"Oh what, no comment about how I deserved to get the shit beat out of me or how I'm a nasty little faggot whose air you don't want to breathe in?"

Snape sighed deeply and moved closer so they were standing only a couple of inches apart. Harry flinched when a hand touched his chin slightly. This was partly because he was surprised at the touch and partly because he always jumped at the slightest movement, thanks to his uncles fist. He lifted his chin up until Harry had to stare right back at him.

He was surprised to find that he had dropped his mask and his expression was extremely soft for the first time ever. "You did not deserve what they did to you. Nobody does. I am going to make sure nothing like that ever happens again and you never have to go back to that horrible place. It appears that our childhoods were similar, but that is a story for another time. And there is nothing wrong with being gay. Actually, I would be a hypocrite to say a word against it."

Harry's head had begun spinning halfway through Snape's little speech. He wasn't going to make fun of him! He had promised him that he wouldn't ever have to go back to the Dursleys! And what did he mean when he said that their childhoods had been similar? Had Snape been abused too? Or was it something else?

And that last bit, about how he would be a hypocrite to say anything against being gay...was it possible...in any way...that Snape was...gay? He was not stupid enough to ask as if he was wrong he would probably get his balls chopped off or worse by the man.

He simply vowed to put his gaydar on the watch from now on.


	9. Chapter 9

Harry made complete sure to avoid Sirius at all costs over the next few days. This proved to be extremely hard as they were currently living underneath the same roof. He spent most of his time locked in his room, listening to music and getting fucked up or talking to his friends on webcam. Sirius remained locked in his room most of the time while Snape was always in the library reading boring looking books about Potions.

Ron and Hermione had both written to share their O.W.L. results and ask how the past few days had been. He replied to them both, telling them all about his results and how he didn't even know how he had managed to achieve four outstandings. He had purposely avoided the question about how his time with Sirius was going. He had absolutely no desire to tell them about all that had happened after they had left on his birthday. They really had grown apart.

Whatever had gone down between Sirius and Remus must have been pretty bad as the wolf had not been back over once, even though Harry knew that he stayed here more than he did his own home half of the time.

On the rare occasions that Sirius and he crossed paths in the hallway or inside of the kitchen, he noted how completely miserable the other man looked. He was beginning to consider forgiving him, but he had no idea how to approach him after what had happened.

A knock sounded on his door and he jumped violently before calling "come in", not even bothering to hide the lit cigarette currently in his hand. It turned out to be Remus, looking extremely uncomfortable for some reason.

"Err…can you please come down to the sitting room for a moment? Sirius and I would like to speak with you."

Well, no wonder he had looked so nervous and uncomfortable. He must have known that getting him to be in the same room as his godfather would be a job in itself.

"I don't want-"

"I know, Harry. I know that you don't want to have anything to do with him right now. I just got done hearing all about what happened the other night and I am one hundred percent on your side. He was in the wrong and he damn well knows it. You must also realize how badly he is hurting right now. You are the only family he has left and you won't even acknowledge his existence. I know how badly he hurt you, but can you please try to forgive him?"

Harry sighed deeply, allowing him a long moment to think and process. Sirius had hurt him badly, but everybody deserved a second chance, right? It wasn't like the other man didn't regret his actions. It wasn't like he hadn't spent the past few days completely miserable. He was beginning to feel extremely bad at how harsh he had been. He needed to find a way to go down there and let the man know that he was forgiven, but how?

He took a last drag from his cigarette before stubbing it out in the paper cup he had been using as an ashtray, knowing that Remus was closely watching his every single move.

"Better not let Sirius catch you smoking. He has no problem with Marijuana, but he absolutely despises cigarettes. I'm just warning you now before you find out the hard way."

That was odd. You'd think that Sirius would have more of a problem with the drugs than with the nicotine. People were strict about the weirdest shit sometimes.

He nodded in understanding before leading the way out of the bedroom. He paused only briefly at the bottom of the stairs before continuing on into the sitting room. Remus took a seat next to Sirius on the couch and Snape was already sitting in the armchair closest to the fireplace.

Harry sat down in the only remaining chair, wondering why the hell they were all gathered in the room like some sort of interrogation was about to happen at any moment now. He couldn't stand the silence anymore and he broke it by deciding to tell his godfather the truth about his sexuality.

Sirius cleared his throat and opened his mouth to speak, but Harry beat him to it. "Sirius….I need to tell you something. Only I'm nervous about it because you see, you're the only real family I have. My aunt and uncle sort of know about this thing I'm about to talk to you about and they belittle me for it. I need you to not do that, no matter how you feel about it, because I can handle it from anybody else, but not you."

His godfather nodded slowly, eyebrows knit together in curiosity. Harry got up and came to sit on the coffee table only inches away from the couch in which Sirius and Remus currently occupied.

"Sirius…I'm gay." His eyes widened in alarm as the two men glanced at each other and burst out in insane laughter. It took them many long moments to get it under control, enough time to allow him to grow extremely curious about what the hell was suddenly so funny.

He cast a glance over at Snape during this. He didn't even look curious in any way, just extremely bored and annoyed.

"I'm sorry...you know, for laughing. We are not making fun of you. Merlin knows, we are not making fun of you. It's…it's just…" He looked down and noticed that the two were holding hands like it was the most natural thing in the world. He looked back up questioningly.

"This is what we needed to talk to you about. We are in a relationship. We have been for many months now, but this one over here-" He threw a pointed glance at Remus. "This one over here has been too afraid to tell anybody. We still have not gotten around to telling many people, but we figured you and Snape should know considering we're all living underneath the same roof and Remus has been practically living here for the past few months."

Harry was beyond shocked, but this did not render him blind. He had noticed the way that Sirius had given Snape a look as he had said this. It almost looked like some kind of warning. He had also noticed the way Snape had looked confused for a short moment before nodding his head up and down so little that you could barely tell he was moving it at all.

Deciding he would get to the bottom of that look later, he focused his attention back on his godfather. Obviously, he did not care that the two men were in a relationship. What he was concerned about was his godfather's happiness. He hoped that Remus would make him happy because Merlin knows Sirius had experienced enough hurt in his lifetime.

He watched the two men sitting on the couch closely. They were still holding hands, but Remus now had his free arm wrapped around his waist, holding him tightly. He watched as he leaned up to whisper something in Sirius's ear and the other man smiled broadly, whispering back.

He cleared his throat to grant their attention. "I...I think it's great that you two are together. I am really happy for you two. Just don't ever have another fight like the other night." He said the last part with a laugh, but it was the farthest thing from funny

Sirius suddenly moved away from the couch and came to kneel down in front of the arm chair that he was currently occupying.

"Harry...I am so sorry about the other night. My actions were unforgivable, I know that. I don't blame you if you hate me and never wish to speak to me again. You and Remus are my family, you must understand that. I love you both more than anything and I want to make things right again. And I also want you to know that I would never lay a hand on you. What those Muggles did to you was inexcusable. If I would have known just how bad things were, I would have done something to get you out of there sooner."

He whipped his head around and cast a look at Snape, who merely raised an eyebrow. What the fuck had he told them? He had absolutely no right to say anything!

He gave Snape the dirtiest look he could muster before turning back to Sirius

. "I forgive you." He said, pulling him into an extremely long hug. He felt a hand grasp his shoulder and glanced up to find that Remus had joined their little hugging fest.

Harry distinctly heard Snape stalk from the room mumbling about how this wasn't the fucking Brady Bunch. He had to try extremely hard to laugh at the comment as he wondered how Snape even knew about a Muggle television program.

They finally broke apart and Remus yawned rather loud and drowned out. "Well, I am extremely tired. I think I'm going to go take a nap. You coming?" Remus asked Sirius who nodded and followed him out of the room.

Harry had a feeling they were going to do a little more than take a nap. He blanched at the thought and decided to go sit on the steps with his laptop as he would rather not be in the house while they were doing...whatever.

The smell of weed hit his nose the moment he cracked open the giant oak door. He almost died from shock as he glanced down and realized that it was coming from Snape. The older man was sitting on the bottom porch step holding a tiny rolled up joint in between his middle and index fingers.

Snape glanced up and him, but then looked right back down, unconcerned with his presence. "Don't look so shocked, Mr. Potter." He drawled, taking a long hit. "I am sure that you are quite familiar with this particular substance."

"What would make you think that?" He asked, coming to sit down one step above Snape.

He turned to roll his eyes rather dramatically and give him a look that plainly said not to attempt to deny it any longer. "I have been smoking since I was fourteen years of age. I can tell when somebody is a smoker or not."

He nodded, but didn't say anything else. Snape took another hit and he was surprised when he outstretched his arm to pass the joint over to him. He took a tiny puff, letting the smoke slip out through his nose. This was weird, smoking pot with a teacher. Especially a teacher like Snape. They passed it back and forth between them, engaging in light conversation.

Once it was finished, Harry pulled his shrunken duffel bag out of his pocket. "Do you want to go back in or do you want to smoke something even better?"

"I don't feel like hearing your godfather and Lupin thrashing around like a pair of wild Banshees. So, if you will..." He pulled out his wand and cast a silent unshrinking charm on the matchbox sized duffel bag.

Harry grinned and pulled his bong out.

Thirty minutes later found them still on the front porch, only extremely under the influence. It was swiftly growing darker with each passing moment and the stars were beginning to come out.

Nobody knew it, but Harry absolutely loved Astronomy. He thought it was the most beautiful and romantic thing. Nobody knew that he was a sucker for romantic things like poetry and the beach and candlelight and picnics and acoustic guitar and singing either. He would die before he let that one get out to anybody.

They had smoked four bowls of pure Dro and they were both completely blown at this point.

He was in that stage of high where his whole body was numb and he would occasionally twitch every now and then. He could hardly remember his last thought and he knew he would have trouble standing up when the time came to go back

Although Sev-Snape would never admit it, he was perhaps past the point of blown at this point in time. He was behaving in a very un-Snape like manner, mumbling incoherently about how hungry he was and chain smoking a pack of cigarettes he had produced from Merlin knows where. His eyes were so dilateds and bloodshot that they almost looked as if they were completely closed.

Harry closed his eyes and shook his head. Why the hell had he almost called Snape by his first name just then? Even if it was just in his head, it was still weird and made him feel extremely uncomfortable to be in his presence.

He leaned back until he was lying flat on his back staring up at the sky. Snape barely took time to glance in his direction before doing the exact same thing, rather dizzily if he was not mistaken. He had scooted over as he had lain down next to him and they were now extremely close to one another. Their heads were three inches apart at the most and he could smell a calming lavender scent coming from him.

"It's so beautiful." He said aloud, staring up at the sky in awe. His high had boosted his senses and everything appeared to be fuller of color and easier to see than before.

He was surprised to hear Snape's voice as he had not expected him to reply to such a "Gryffindor-like comment" to put it in the man's own words. "Yes, it is." He caught himself smiling against his will as the two lay side by side, staring up at the stars.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"You already did." He remarked, taking a puff from a lit cigarette.

Harry reached over and lightly batted Snape on the arm without even really thinking about the consequences until after the fact. To his surprise, he was not hexed and the man even nudged him back a little bit, but Harry strongly suspected that he was too stoned to move too much.

"Go on and ask your question you little imbecile. I haven't got all night, you know."'

"Okay, forget it. I wouldn't want to keep you away from hearing the screams and moans as you open the front door."

Snape had a odd look on his face and was making rapid gasping sounds. For a moment, Harry started to get worried, but he soon realized that the man was attempting to hold back his laughter. He eventually failed and laughed aloud, startling Harry. This only suceeded in making him laugh and Snape start laughing even harder. Before they knew it, neither of them could stop laughing, the weed probably playing a small influence in that.

Things eventually settled down and the two turned to stare at each other for a long moment, neither daring to break the gaze. Snape had an odd look on his face as he looked at him for the longest time. It wasn't a bad look, but Harry was confused as to what the look meant. It had been soft and caring and full of wonder. Nobody had ever looked at him like that before.

Their staring contest ended and things grew serious once again. He took a deep breath before asking the thing that had been on his mind ever since that day in Diagon Ally.

"The other day...when you said-when you said that you'd be a hypocrite to say a word against being gay...did you mean...are you gay?"

"Yes." Snape answered without hesitation.

"When did you-?"

"When did I realize that I only liked men?"

Harry nodded and Snape didn't reply for a long moment. He didn't know if he had offended him in some way or if he was just taking a moment to collect his thoughts before speaking to him about it.

"I was four or five years old the first time I found somebody of the same sex to be attractive. I kept it to myself, as I knew that it would not be considered normal by my parents. I denied my attractions for a long time, but when I was sixteen I decided I did not want to hide anymore. I told a few people one night whilst under the influence and naturally the whole school knew the next day. A few people, such as your father, made fun of me, but most people did not care. After that, I had a few casual flings, but the real thing did not come along until I was twenty two years old. We were together for five years."

He noticed something strange in Snape's voice as he said the last bit and was surprised to find him looking completely defeated as he stared up at the night sky lost in thought. He was almost afraid to ask what had happened between the two men. Had he cheated on him? Left him for a woman? Or was it something worse?

He cleared his throat, knowing he had to ask or it would bother him to no end. "What happened? With you two, I mean."

"He...he passed away." He said so quietly that Harry had to strain to hear him correctly. "He was a half blood and inherited the cancer gene from his Muggle father. I spent the last two years of our relationship doing everything in my power to keep him alive, but in the end, the cancer got him anyways."

Harry didn't know what to say in response. This was Snape who was pouring his heart out to him, of all people. He wasn't acting like Snape at the moment, though. He was acting like a man who had been broken in a million different ways, but he knew that the man was currently doing his best not to let it show. He had a strong sense of pride and self control in which Harry partly envied him for and partly pitied him for.

Without even thinking about the fact that he would probably get punched in the face or Crucio'd, he placed his small hand on top of Snape's larger one. It was surprisingly warm and he grew the strongest urge to intertwine their fingers together, but he held back from doing so as he felt that would more than likely end extremely badly.

He took it as a good sign when Snape didn't pull his hand away from his. He did, however, flinch slightly at the slightest touch and Harry wondered when the last time he'd had any source of physical contact had been.

They lay there in silence for the longest amount of time. Time continued to slip by, but the neither of them cared as they watched the stars. He could see the Big Dipper and the Constellation Leo, but he did not voice this aloud as he did not want to ruin the moment.

London had grown strangly quiet and there was a sense of piece in the summer air. The only sounds to be heard were coming from the carnival a few miles away. If he tilted his head back as far as it would go he could just barely see the swirling neon lights from the rides.

The air surrounding them smelled of flowers, sea air, and suntan lotion. It was clear and filled his lungs in a way that satisfied his oxygen supply in a cooling way. Crickets croaked in the distance and a slight breeze engulfed them. It wasn't too hot, or too cold. It was perfect.

Harry stared in awe as a shooting star shot across the darkness. It was like a scene from a Nicholas Sparks novel, only it was real and he was living in closed his eyes tightly and made a wish, praying on everything that it would one day come true.

As the star shooted out into the distance, he tore his eyes away from the sky. He both feared and loved the was he felt his heart jump in an odd way as Severus turned his head and they looked each other in the eyes at the exact same moment.


	10. Chapter 10

Authors Note: I want to thank all of you that have reviewed for this story! I know I haven't been updating lately, but I've been so busy with school lately! I also want to thank the person that reminded me about not using American money in this story. I spaced about and completely forgot lol. I would also like to make it clear that this story takes place in 2008 and onward, which is completely different from the books.

Disclaimer: Anything you recognize is not mine.

Harry slammed the lid of his trunk shut, looking around the room to make complete sure that he hadn't left anything behind. His two week stay at Grimmauld place had passed quickly and it was now time for his training with Snape to begin. They were setting off to his new house in a few hours' time and he had never dreaded anything more in his entire sixteen years.

Ever since that night out on the porch, Snape had returned to his usual asshole self. He took every chance that he found to insult him, made fun of his appearance, and had even had the nerve to inform Sirius that he suspected him to be an alcoholic drug addict. Which he certainly wasn't, by the way. He liked drugs and alcohol, he didn't need them. That was the difference.

All in all, he would rather go back to the Dursleys than spend another moment around Snape. That was definitely saying something. He didn't quite understand why the man's recent actions were upsetting him so much. It's not like they had ever been close before. It's not like he had feelings for the man. No, there was no way in hell that could ever happen.

It was just…he had felt this sense of security that night. Just by lying next to the man, talking about their lives and watching the stars. All of his worries about the past, present, and future had gone out the window until it was like they were the only two left on the entire planet. Harry had never felt something like that when he was with another, but it didn't matter. Snape was…Snape.

Harry grabbed his trunk and began heaving it down the three flights of stairs, cursing Sirius for giving him a room on the third floor of all places. He deposited his trunk in the hallway and entered the kitchen where the Snape, Remus, and Sirius were all eating breakfast. He took a seat at the end of the table, selected a tiny piece of toast, and bit into it.

It only took him a few moments to notice that something strange was going on. The usual banter that took place at the table had been replaced with a peculiar silence. Remus had his face in his hands, Sirius had one hand on his lovers shoulder while he massaged his own forehead with the other, and Snape was staring down at his plate as if it were the only object in the entire room.

"What's going on?" He finally asked, clearing his throat.

Nobody made even the slightest movement for a few seconds before Snape finally scraped back his chair, feeling around in his robes for something. He leaned across the table to hand him a folded up issue of the Daily Prophet.

"Hogwarts student found dead in downtown London early this morning"

Harry gasped as he read the headline of the day's newspaper. Who had died now? Oh lord, he hoped it wasn't somebody that he was close to. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before unfolding the rest of the paper, his hands causing the entire newspaper to shake violently.

"Around five thirty this Friday morning, August 14, 2008, a young African American male was found dead outside of a Muggle bookshop. He had been viciously attacked and suffered extensive damage from the Cruciatus Curse. Experts have determined that the attack took place around midnight and the victim died several hours later due to his many injuries. The victim has been identified as Dean Thomas, sixth year student at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and a known friend to the famous Harry Po-"

At this point, Harry threw down the newspaper and bolted for the stairs. He couldn't stand to read anymore. He couldn't stand to be around the three men currently occupying the kitchen. He was on the edge of having a mental fucking breakdown and didn't want anybody around to witness to it.

Ignoring Remus and Sirius calling for him to come back, he slammed his bedroom door behind him, placing several locking and silencing charms on it in the process. He picked up a book and flung it across the room. He screamed out and kicked the table. He sent his fist flying into the wall. He felt a few tears slip down his cheeks and didn't bother to wipe them away. This wasn't fair. Dean didn't deserve to die. He was seventeen years old! He was supposed to finish his education, get a decent career, get married, have children. He'd had his whole life ahead of him and now he was dead. He had just seen him at his birthday celebration less than two weeks ago and now he was dead. Gone. Not coming back.

He un-shrunk his duffel back and pulled one of his tiny baggies of cocaine out of the secret pocket built into the side. He pinched a decent amount between his fingers, spreading it out on the bedside table and rolling up a five pound note. He chopped it up a little with his lighter before bending down and snorting the powdery substance up his left nostril. It burned a great deal, causing his eyes to water.

He blinked and rubbed his nose furiously, already beginning to feel the effects. He completely finished his line before pulling out a bottle of vodka and beginning to chug away. The cocaine alone would have been enough for him, but to be completely honest; he just didn't give a shit any longer. He needed to numb the ball of pain that was currently constricting itself throughout his entire body. If he allowed himself to feel, he might just snap entirely.

Time passed with him just staring straight ahead at the wall, not seeing, not feeling, just simply being. After what could have been hours or just a few minutes, he vaguely registered the sound of somebody knocking on the door, but he ignored it. Didn't they understand that he just wanted to be left alone to his thoughts? Was that really too much to ask? He chugged from the bottle once more, his mind sinking in and out of consciousness.

He didn't even realize that his wards had been broken down until a weight sank down on the bed next to him and gently tried to pry the bottle from in between his legs. He held onto it and took as many gulps as he could before it was completely wrenched away from him. He turned to see that bastard Snape banishing the bottle to Merlin knows where.

"Get the fuck out."

"No."

"Leave me alone!" He demanded.

"No."

Fine, if he wouldn't leave him alone then he would just leave the house all together. Maybe he could take a train or bus back to Surrey. He could go to Andy's house. Live there forever. Forget about the magical world and all of his fucking responsibilities. Yes, that sounded perfect.

Harry stood and immediately began to sway back and forth. He stumbled around attempting to pick up his discarded possessions. He had finally managed to pick up his socks and shoes when they were plucked out of his hands. He spun around to tell Snape off, but lost his balance and would have fallen if the other man wouldn't have been there to catch him.

Strong arms grabbed him and pulled him over to the bed. The room began spinning like crazy and he closed his eyes shut tight as he lay down on his back. He felt a hand wrench open his jaw and pour something down his throat. He swallowed in hopes that Snape had taken pity on him and given him more alcohol.

Several moments later it appeared that this was not the case as the room stopped spinning and the room came into clear focus once again. That ass had given him a potion to sober him up!

He jumped up from the bed and rounded on Snape. The other man was leaning against the door, arms crossed and a scrutinizing look on his face.

"You tricked me you asshole!"

"Language, Potter!"

This just pissed him off even more and he could no longer hold in his built up anger. "I don't care! I don't fucking care, Snape! You fucking come in here and violate my personal space knowing I want to be left alone! Then you have the audacity to trick me into drinking a potion to sober me up! It's fucking bullshit! I don't need anyone! Especially you of all people! You could give a shit less about me or the way I fucking feel as long as I'm here to save the fucking world! Just leave me alone! I don't need anybody but myself!"

He finished his rant and went to send his fist flying into the wall again. He needed to get his anger out. He needed to harm his body so he could forget about the hurt inside of his chest. He punched the wall as hard as he could and was going in for a second swing when a strong hand grabbed his fist. He slammed his arm backward, trying to get free. Snape responded by wrapping his arms around his torso and heaving him backward.

"Get off! Let me go you mother fucking asshole!"

He fought desperately to get free, but it was no use. Snape was way stronger than he looked to be. He fought and struggled until he wore himself out, stopping all movement all together. Snape was either shocked by this or he didn't trust him enough to release him yet. Either way, he kept his arms firmly wrapped around him for a long moment. He knew he should be fighting to remove himself as soon as possible, but for some reason he found himself never wanting to move. He felt a weird tingling sensation in the put of his stomach, one that he had never felt before. After a moment, he came to his senses and removed himself to sit on the bed, pushing his previous thoughts to the very back of his mind.

Snape sat down next to him and he ignored him, burying his face in his hands instead in hopes that he would go away. "You do care." He spoke surprisingly quietly and calmly. "You care so much that it's eating you alive. You don't want to admit it, though. You hold everything inside until you explode. You use alcohol as a way of dealing with your pain. You think it's your fault that everybody in your life keeps dying, or leaving, or hurting you in some way. You're sick of being the hero of the Wizarding World. You just want to run away from it all. Don't you?"

All Harry could manage to do through the sobs wracking throughout his body was nod his head yes. He was surprised when a gentle hand began rubbing his back up and down. This caused him to completely lose it. He in turn buried his face into his shoulder and cried. And cried and cried and cried. He cried until there were no tears left, starting to wonder just what the hell he was doing with his life.


	11. Chapter 11

"Flipendo!"

Harry went sailing through the air and landed on his back on the hard wooden floor.

"Alright, Potter. That's enough for today. Get up and start on your studying."

They had just gone through another particularly exhausting Defense lesson. It had mainly consisted of Snape knocking him off balance, jinxing him, and using the Imperius curse on him to force him to tap dance around the room like a complete and total idiot. To his credit, he had thrown Snape into the wall once or twice and accidently changed his t-shirt into a lace blouse by complete accident. He would never forget the look on the other man's face as he had looked down at his torso. Ever.

He had been at Snape's house for three days now and he had never been so bored or exhausted in his entire life. The man had literally been working him down to the bone. He seemed to think it was perfectly normal to wake him up at the crack of dawn to eat breakfast, work on his Potions skills until lunchtime, then have defense lessons and study until late in the evening. He had absolutely no free time and he was getting sick and tired of it. He understood that he needed to learn and prepare, but he was only sixteen years old. It wasn't fair.

This wasn't the only reason he was so on edge, though. After that day in his bedroom at Grimmauld place, Snape had taken it upon himself to search his possessions against his will. He had taken away every drop of alcohol that had been in his bag plus a few pills that he had found. He had left his pot and cigarettes and hadn't found the cocaine, luckily. He hadn't had a single drop in three days and he was going absolutely insane. He longed for the drunken nights at Andy's house, to go out to the club with his friends, to just fucking live again. No regrets and no regard for reality.

He completely ignored Snape as he lay on the floor attempting to catch his breath.

"Come on! Get up!"

He shook his head as he slowly picked himself up. A loud crack sounded as he did so and he almost doubled over in pain. His back was completely torn up from getting slammed against hard surfaces over and over again. No way was he doing anything else today. He didn't even care how much it pissed his professor off or if it caused them to forget their momentary truce and break the peace between them.

He limped out of the room and up the basement staircase. He felt Snape's eyes on him as he did so, but pretended like he had no clue that he was currently being watched like a hawk. After what felt like an eternity, he made it into the living room and flopped down on the large, tan colored couch.

He picked up the remote control and immediately flipped over to Mtv. The fact that Snape had a Muggle telly both shocked and pleased him to no end. Living at Grimmauld place had been boring without a TV to occupy his mind. Plus, he was behind on all of his programs. That's why e was pleased to see that a Jersey Shore marathon was on. He definitely needed to catch up.

"Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?"

At the sound of his voice, he jumped about a foot and a half in the air. He had been so preoccupied with reaching his destination that he hadn't even registered the other man being in the room with him. Damn, he was really losing his fucking mind.

He could tell that the other man expected him to turn off the television and go into the library to study, but he paid him no attention as the commercial break ended and he became engrossed in his show once more. A dark mass blocked his view and he glared angrily at Snape. He was in the middle of watching Snooki and Angelina scream at each other! This was important!

Harry sighed deeply, knowing that an argument was in the process of brewing. "Look, I've been studying every night since I got here. I think I deserve a break." He was getting extremely irritated. Why couldn't he just give it a moments rest? When Snape didn't reply for a minute, he took a peak at the screen. The two girls were fighting each other in the living room and he was missing it!

He flinched horribly as Snape reached out suddenly and proceeded to drag him up from the couch by his arm. His back bent in the process and he screwed his face up tightly to prevent himself from calling out in pain. He had a feeling there was something wrong other than a few bad bruises.

"You will go study and you wil-" Snape stopped talking midsentence, only pausing for a moment to study his figure. Harry tried his hardest to look like he was fine, even though it felt like a white hot poker was making its way through his upper back. "Where are you in pain at, Potter? And don't deny it or I will force you to run laps around the yard until you break."

"My back." He said, caving in at last. He didn't care if he looked weak. The pain needed to stop. Right now. It felt like he had broken his entire back.

"Take your shirt off and lay down on the couch facing downward."

He did as he was told with a little bit of hesitation. Never in his entire life had he been self-conscious of his body, but he suddenly felt like a scrawny little boy with a pudge for a stomach. This wasn't right. This wasn't him. He didn't give a shit what anybody thought about him, especially Snape, which was why he didn't understand the thoughts that were currently running through his head. "What if he thinks I'm even uglier? What if he thinks I'm not toned enough? What if he makes fun of me? What if he begins to think of me as a little boy again?"

Through his own thoughts, he had managed to pay attention to reality enough to know that Snape was running a diagnostic spell instead of hexing him when the tip of a wand pressed gently against his back. The pain began to gradually cease until it was barely there at all. A few seconds later Snape mumbled another spell and he instantly felt a warming sensation spreading throughout his shoulders.

"How long have you been experiencing this pain?"

"Umm, ever since the first lesson. Why?" He replied back while slowly curling his feet up to his chest so the other man would have enough room to sit down next to him if he wished. He doubted he would actually do it, though. So far he had only seen him sit in the large armchair closest to the fireplace.

Snape surprised him by taking a seat next to him and studying him for a long moment. "Why didn't you say anything?" He asked in a soft voice. Instead of thinking of some witty reply, he just shrugged his shoulders. The real reason he hadn't said anything was because he assumed that this was the price that he needed to pay for receiving extra training. Besides, he was never one to complain about pain. No matter how bad it got.

"You completely managed to tear a muscle in your upper shoulder region. I healed it the best I could, but because you waited to say something for so long, you will still experience some discomfort for a few more days. Instead of defense, we're going to move on to something else. I'll let you know what it is tomorrow. As for your studying, you may skip that tonight if you wish. But don't expect this to happen every other day now. Understand?"

Harry nodded and Snape passed the TV changer back over to him. He opened it just in time to catch the last five minutes of the episode and was pleased to see that the crazy bitch decided to leave in the end. The next episode started and of course, they were all partying by the opening credits. He loved this show so much.

Snape waited until commercial break to start in with his snarky little comments. "Why in the hell do you watch this..." He paused and Harry could see him attempting to choose his words. "Junk." He finally spat out after a moment.

"It's not junk!" Harry huffed at the thought of anybody not liking his favorite show.

"All I've seen them do so far is consume ridiculous amounts of alcohol, go to the gym, throw objects at one another, and attempt to have sexual relations with every moving, breathing, thing in sight."

He just rolled his eyes at the man, knowing perfectly well that everything he had just said was correct. The commercial break ended and he became engrossed in the show once more, allowing himself to grow comfortable on his professors' couch. He pulled a throw blanket over himself and stretched his feet out, completely forgetting that the other man's lap was there until his feet touched.

When they weren't immediately shoved down into the floor, he relaxed in shock and glanced over at Snape. He was staring straight ahead at the television as if nothing had ever happened, but he could have sworn that he detected a slight uplifting in the corners of his mouth. What he had done to make him halfway smile was beyond him, but he wouldn't question it any further.

He must have fallen asleep without even realizing that he was tired because the next thing he knew it was dark outside and Snape was attempting to shake him awake. "Come on, dinner is ready. We can eat in here since you're injured just sit up and try not to spill anything or I'll have your arse."

This brightened him slightly as he had been dreading sitting in the hard wooden kitchen chairs. He pushed himself up to accept a plate with steak and mashed potatoes on it, his mouth watering at the sight. This was possibly his favorite meal ever. He doubted Snape knew that, though. It was just some sort of bizarre coincidence.

He finished his plate in record time and stood to bring it into the kitchen. "Are you finished?" He asked.

Snape looked up at him confused for a moment before realizing what he was trying to do. "Yes, but there is no need-" He was cut off as Harry whipped the plate out of his hand and stomped into the kitchen. He placed them in the sink and cast a charm to set the dishes to wash themselves. He figured it was the least he could do, as Snape didn't have a house elf to do his chores for him like most Wizard's did.

The pain began in his back again just as he was finishing and he had to limp his way over to the couch. He sat down and felt Snape staring at him again. "Be right back." He mumbled. Harry knitted his eyebrows together in confusion and watched him trot down the long hallway and into his bedroom.

He came back out not a moment later and he grinned around the room as he saw the tiny green pipe in his left hand. He didn't know what had compelled Snape to smoke with him, but he definitely wasn't going to complain. He hadn't been smoking more than a bowl every other day because he needed to conserve his shit as much as possible.

He pulled out a tiny tray from underneath the couch and began breaking up a large bud on it. Harry couldn't help but admire his hands as he worked at making the pieces smaller and smaller so they would be better to smoke. The other man worked his bottom lip in between his teeth and paused to flip a stray strand of hair out of his face. Harry honestly couldn't deny it anymore. He was sexy. Never before had he became so turned on by just simply watching someone do a simple task like this.

"Thought this might dull down the pain a bit."

The man's voice brought him out of reality and he noticed that he was now packing the bowl down and putting away the rest of his supplies while searching around the area for something. "Looking for this?" Harry asked, holding out the metal Zippo that he had jacked from the coffee table two days ago. He received a slap on the head and the lighter being jerked out of his hands in return.

Snape brought the bowl to his lips, pressed his finger over the carborator, flicked the lighter, and inhaled. The bowl was still lit when he passed it over, so all he had to do was inhale. The smoke filled his lungs instantly and he began coughing like an idiot who had never smoked weed before. He was coughing so hard that he felt nauseous and his back was beginning to throb in protest. Jeeze, this shit was strong.

"So, tell me something." He said, breaking the silence and pulling a cigarette out of his pack by his teeth. He looked around for the lighter, but it was nowhere in sight.

"Like what?" Snape replied, suddenly producing a flame and holding it up to his mouth.

Harry blew out smoke and studied the man sitting in front of him for a moment. He was puffing on a grape flavored cigar and leaning back, looking lost in his thoughts. Many minutes of silence ensued and he jumped terribly when the other man suddenly shot up from the couch. "Come on." He commanded, already beginning to stride throughout the house. Harry followed him and was surprised to find them entering his personal bedroom.

It was nicer than he had expected it to be. There was a king sized bed in the middle of the room with emerald green covers on top of it. The walls were painted a deep red that somehow gave off a calming effect. A small wooden dresser sat in the left corner, a writing desk on the right, and a gigantic wardrobe topped it all off. He knitted his eyebrows together in confusion as his professor pulled out a plain black jacket and slipped it on. He then did the strangest thing; he began feeling around on top of the ceiling as if in search of something invisible. His jaw dropped as a sort of trap door appeared. Snape glanced back at him to find his gawking. "Come on, you go first."

He clambered up the ladder and almost fell backwards when a sharp blast of cool air hit him right in the face. He kept going and climbed out of the hole. He stopped and looked around. They appeared to be on the roof of the building. He had a perfect view of the surrounding countryside from here. He slowly hung over the railing in awe for several long moments.

When he finally came back to his senses, he slowly began walking around the roof without looking down and nearly fell when his foot suddenly sank down. He looked up and let out a real genuine smile. A comfy looking black futon sat down in the hole along with a stain glass coffee table. Snape had set lit candles around the edge of the area and an incense burner sat on the table. Low music was coming from a tiny radio on the table.

"Like it?" An amused voice jerked him back to reality.

"I love it." He breathed, not even caring how flaming he had just sounded.

Snape gave another little half smile before gesturing at him to sit down on the couch. Without any hesitation, he picked up the bowl and took a gigantic hit. He was still holding the smoke in his mouth as he passed it back over to Snape who in turn smoked half of the bowl without offering him anymore. When he looked up, he must have seen the look of indignation on his face.

"Calm yourself, will you? I have more right here." He said, pulling out a tiny baggie with maybe a dimes worth in it. Harry jerked the baggie from his hands and refilled it himself. He took a few hits before passing it over.

"This is where I come to relax after a long day, or when I have a spare moment of time at night. There's an almost perfect view of the stars from here and there are no loud noises to distract you all the way up here."

He nodded, seeing exactly what the man was talking about. Time passed without much conversation between the two, but the silence wasn't awkward. They smoked the rest of the time and then some that he had been carrying around in his pocket. He honestly doubted he had ever been this high in his entire life. His whole body was numb and he was so relaxed. He had even forced Snape to stand up so they could turn the couch into a bed to lay back on.

He had taken the middle and Snape had taken the left side, leaving barely any room in between them. They lay in silence staring up at the stars. He wanted to say something to break the silence, but he didn't know what.

"Do you ever get horny when you're high?" He wanted to slap himself in the forehead right as the words came tumbling out of his big mouth. Snape was his professor! That was completely inappropriate and he could probably get in serious trouble. Besides, it was just wrong. "But he's not acting very much like a professor right now, is he? And who cares if it's wrong, just live in the moment." The little voice in the back of his head whispered to him. Taunted him.

Snape turned over on his right side and lay his head not an inch away from his own. Chills went running up and down his entire body as their eyes connected. "I don't think that's any of your business." Snape whispered without breaking eye contact. He gulped and tried not to look away. He was thisclose to jumping his professors bones, all sense of guilt completely thrown out the window at this point in time.

He didn't know who made the first move, but they both lurched forward and met in a soul shattering kiss. If he'd had any doubts about his feelings up until this point, they were now completely gone. Never in his life had he shared such a passionate, needing, wanting kiss with another. They were busy getting lost in the others body's, melting together perfectly.

He felt his head rolling back like crazy as their tongues began clashing violently together and the other man forced him onto his back so he could climb on top of him. He couldn't suppress the loud moan that omitted from his throat as the extra weight pressed down on top of his body. Snape practically fucking growled in response and moved his lips down to his throat. He licked and sucked and bit at it and he didn't even care about the marks he was sure to have in the morning. He reached up to grab the man's ass and pulled him closer.

Then, it was over as soon as it had started. The man rolled off of him and stomped toward the direction of the trap door before he even had the chance to realize what was happening.


	12. Chapter 12

FINALLY found the time to write a new chapter! Enjoy! xx.

Harry remained shut up in his room for the next three days. His mind still could not fully process what had occurred the other night. He had kissed Severus Snape, his greasy haired, big nosed, cold, heartless, Potions teacher. His Potions teacher! Harry was no expert but he was almost sure that they could both get in a shit load of trouble for even one tiny kiss and what had happened was way more than a tiny little kiss. Severus had been on top of him, fucking moaning and attacking his entire body.

Not that he had minded one bit, by the way. Never before in his entire life had anybody kissed him like that. He couldn't even think about what it had felt like without erupting in cold shivers. It wouldn't be happening ever again, though, the mans actions had sure as hell showed that. He was so hurt, so confused, so fucking embarrassed as the man rolled off of him and stomped back inside as if nothing had ever happened. He hadn't even been able to gather up the will to get up and relocate to his bedroom. Instead, he had spent the night on the futon, laying flat on his back and staring at the stars.

The next morning, after sleeping for only a few hours, he had cautiously moved across the roof and looked down into Severus' bedroom. The bed was empty and had already been made, so he took a deep breath before climbing down the ladder and shutting himself in his bedroom as quickly as possible.

He snuck out at night to use the bathroom and grab a sandwich or something, but that was it. He spent the rest of his time snorting coke, chain smoking, and video chatting with his friends. He made sure to keep himself high at all times so he wouldn't be able to feel the pain he knew would hit him as soon as he was in a clear state of mind. This was absolute fucking torture as Severus made no move to talk to him or even check to make sure he was still alive. It was like he could care less if he ever had anything to do with him again. No, he was positive that Severus didn't give a shit. He had just been stoned and horny and he had been the only human being available to satisfy his personal needs.

A knock sounded at his bedroom door and he jumped about a food in the air, knocking over an ashtray in the process. He had grown so used to absolute silence in the house that the noise had startled him terribly. Quickly, he grabbed his wand and siphoned the mess off of the carpet before mumbling "come in."

Severus slowly opened the door and Harry immediately turned his focus to his lap, careful not to make any sort of eye contact. "We're behind on lessons. You need to come down to my lab so we can begin your first Occlumency lesson."

"No." He was not taking Occlumency lessons again. Snape had already given him lessons in his fifth year and it had been an absolute disaster. No, that didn't even begin to describe it. Snape hadn't had any patience what-so-ever. He had expected him to know how to do it right off the bat, hadn't given him any breathing room at all, and had spent every lesson belittling his intelligence. Then there had been the incident with the Pensive where he had ended up thrown against a wall with cockroach juice all over him. There was no way in hell he was going to repeat the terrible experience for a second time.

"No way in hell."

"Potter, you will do what I say."

Instead of nodding his head and going on command like he would have done the previous year, he held his ground and looked his professor right in the eyes. Striking black eyes connected with his and he almost lost himself in them, but somehow managed to snap back into reality. "I'm not going to have my mind invaded, be screamed at, and get thrown around like a rag doll again. I'm not fucking doing it." He spat out in frustration, angrily grabbing a cigarette off of the table and lighting it in a hurry. It pissed him off how they all just expected him to be their little pawn and do exactly what they said. And he was still pissed at Snape for the other night.

Instead of hexing him or screaming in his face like he expected, Snape let out a deep sigh before crossing the room and sitting awkwardly on the edge of the unmade bed. Harry curled his feet up to his chest in order to put more space in between them and eyed him curiously, puffing on his cigarette.

"What if-" Snape started, but stopped after a moment and grew silent, raking a hand through the top of his thick black hair so it was all mussed up and sticking to different places of his face. Incredibly turned on by this, he instead turned his gaze to the wall overhead, refusing to look over.

"What if I promise to go easier on you? I'll start by attempting to teach you the basics and I won't put all of my energy into it at first. After a wile, I will expect you to be able to throw me out of your mind while I'm using all of my strength, but we'll get to that when it comes up."

Harry raised an eyebrow as he lit another cigarette mainly as an excuse to think over his proposition. He didn't want to learn Occlumency. First of all, it was virtually impossible for him and second of all, he hated the idea of anybody invading his mind and witnessing his personal memories.

"Alright." He finally said, blowing out a cloud of smoke. "On a few conditions, though." He waited for Snape to respond, but he just stared calmly at the painting hanging across the room, waiting for him to continue. "No insulting my intelligence, insulting my father, or making fun of any memory you happen to say. And if I say we need to stop, we're going to stop."

"Alright, let's go get started then." Snape said.

Trying not to let his shock and surprise show, he stamped out his cigarette in the ashtray and grabbed his wand off of the bedside table before following him out of the door and down the steps to his potions lab.

Harry took a seat in the wooden chair sitting in the middle of the room with a bit of hesitation. While he had agreed to these lessons, he still wasn't completely sure that he would want to continue once they started. Sev-Snape closed the door behind him and came to stand about five feet away from him.

"Okay, so you need to start by occluding your mind. I remember you stating once that you can't force yourself to think of nothing, so you might want to try something different. Visualizing. It works for some, and it doesn't work at all for others. I personally cannot use this method, but we'll try it anyways."

He nodded and closed his eyes, wondering what exactly he was supposed to be visualizing. He began picturing a sort of forest scene, but found himself getting bored after only a few moments. Instead, he envisioned a beach at night. The water was nearly still, only making a few light splashing noises every now and then. It was completely vacant at this particular spot and an owl hooted in the distance. The stars were shining brightly in the sky and he even added a few constellations he knew from his memory. The full moon was glowing brightly in the sky. He concentrated on the image before him for several minutes, completely blocking out everything around him.

"Are you ready to try now?" Snape asked as soon as he opened his eyes.

He nodded and gripped the edges of the chair tightly, bracing himself for the impact that was sure to come. It slammed into him like a ton of bricks as his memories began flashing before his eyes. Getting punched in the mouth by Dudley when he was four years old, being chased up a tree by Aunt Marge's dogs at 7, sitting in front of the Mirror of Erised at 11, Hermione punching Malfoy in the face third year. He struggled and fought with all of his power as an extremely familiar graveyard came into view. A flash of green light and Cedric laying dead on the ground was the last thing he saw before he managed to throw the other man out of his mind completely.

He clambered back up into the chair, panting and sweating. He really shouldn't be doing this while being as strung out as he currently was, but it's not like he could tell Snape that. He would just have to deal with it and restrain from doing anymore coke until school started again. If he could manage to last that long, that is.

"Well, you did manage to throw me out, but it took you quite some time. It wasn't until I got to a memory that you really didn't want to see again that you channeled all of your energy into it. I expect you to do better next time."

He was too out of breath to respond or argue back so he settled for nodding and wiping his sweat drenched forehead with a handkerchief he produced from his left pocket. He really wanted to remove his shirt, but that would be utterly inappropriate considering the current circumstances between the two.

"Legilimens!" He didn't even have a warning before his mind was invaded again. Flashbacks of memories from Hogwarts were plaguing his vision as he tried to throw Snape out of his mind. Cho Chang came into view and he knew what this memory was before it even began happening. To his relief, Snape took it upon himself to pull out of his mind on his own

Harry collected himself before looking around curiously. Not once had he ever willingly pulled out of a memory of his before. What the hell was going on? The Professor caught onto the look he was giving him and gave a little half shrug. "If I feel as if a memory is too personal, I will pull out of it if you don't manage to throw me out within the first few seconds. I wouldn't want somebody invading my privacy in that way so I won't do it to you." He had a certain edge to his voice as he spoke, almost as if he was bitter or angry about something, but he honestly had no idea what that would be so he just nodded his head.

"Ready?" He asked him a few minutes later. He nodded his okay and began occluding, hoping to block him out before he even had a chance to see a single memory.

It didn't work and he desperately began shoving as he realized what memory had popped up. It was from a drunken night this summer, when he'd had oral sex with a random stranger at the bar. He didn't want the other man seeing this. He tried harder than he ever had in his life, but it did no use. After a stronger wave than he had ever experienced crashed into his body, he realized that Snape was purposely using all of his strength to hold onto the memory.

He stopped fighting and watched helplessly as the guy picked him up and practically threw him down on the counter before violently crashing their lips together once more. His hands worked at the buttons on his pants and he kissed and nipped at his hip bones before taking him into his mouth. Harry threw his head back and moaned.

In another split flash, the memory ended and he realized he was laying flat on his back on the hard stone floor. He slowly gathered himself up and looked around the room just in time to see the swish of a familiar black cloak and hear the door slam. A piece of glass fell to the floor and shattered into a million pieces.


	13. Chapter 13

Severus felt as if he was going to vomit as he stormed through the house, not even bothering to turn around as he heard the window pane shatter from the door he had just slammed shut. Breaking glass hadn't caused his anger to diminish in the slightest. It was pouring throughout his entire body, engulfing him from the inside out. He needed to break more things, destroy an entire building, blow something up, climb on top of the Hogwarts Express and scream at the top of his lungs.

He didn't understand why he felt this way, though. Sure, he had just witnessed the boy in an extremely sexual act, which would probably be enough to make anybody vomit, but still...there was more to it than that. He felt a lashing in the back of his brain, telling him to find the young man from the night club and hunt him down for touching Harr-Potter.

Under absolutely no conditions should he be experiencing these feelings. The boy meant absolutely nothing to him. He was a mere child. An annoying little brat who feels as if the rules don't apply to him. The spitting image of his piece of shit father. Your typical teenager.

"One whom you kissed just the other night." He mumbled to himself as he reached his bedroom. At this reminder, he opened the door, stalked inside, and slammed it shut as hard as he could. A window rattled somewhere in the house, but he didn't even care.

He indeed had kissed the boy the other night. Even worse, he had liked it. Never in a million years would he have thought that something along these lines could happen with the bloody 'Boy Who Lived'. It was completely insane, not to mention wrong on so many levels. He was a professor! The boys teacher! Twenty years and some-odd months his senior!

'But you liked it, Severus. You would do it again if you could' The little devil in the back of his head whispered to him.

He sent his fist flying into the wall as the bubble of frustration became too much. Normally, he would never resort to such childish antics, but this was uncommon ground for him. Completely foreign. He didn't know how to deal with something like this. Bratty children at school? No problem. Having to kill innocent human beings? Piece of cake. The Dark Lord himself? No big deal. No. This...this was an entirely new territory.

"Severus!" A knock sounded at the door.

Fuck. He had been childishly hitting the wall with Harry just in the next room. Normally, he would never allow himself to lose control with another human being within a fifty mile radius. Albus was the absolute and only exception of this rule.

His thoughts were interrupted as the sound of the door slamming against the wall jerked him back into reality. That little brat had seriously just broken his bedroom door off of the hinges!

"Why you little-"

"What in the FUCK was that, Severus? We were in the middle of a lesson!"

He turned away from the boy and sat down on his unmade bed, wishing that he would just leave him alone. It was becoming increasingly harder to look at him as just his student with every passing day and he wouldn't allow himself to lose control again.

"Lessons are over for the day. Go start on your homework or go outside or go watch Tv or something. I don't care what you do as long as you leave me in peace."

To his utter horror, a weight sank down on the bed next to him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, forcing himself not to move a muscle.

"Are we going to pretend that nothing ever happened?"

"I-" He couldn't seem to come up with a coherent answer.

"Because something did happen, Severus. I know you think it's terrible, but it's not. There was a spark when we finally kissed. I felt it and I know that you felt it too. Never before has anything felt that right to me. I'm not stupid or blind, I see the way you look at me when you think I'm not watching. And you put up with my bullshit, which you would not do if you truly hated me. Please just stop running away from your feelings because I don't want to run away from mine any longer."

He sat up straight, unable to move. Processing everything that was just said. He had assumed that it had been nothing more than a blown out of his mind snogging session for Harry. He never thought it possible that a boy that looked like him could have feelings for a man such as himself. And did he really look at him in a certain way that would give...whatever these peculiar feelings that he had developed away? It was true that he put up with more than he would have put up with even just a few weeks ago, but he had convinced himself that it was because he had realized that the boy didn't lead a life of pure luxury.

It was true that things had changed between them over the past few weeks spent together. He had realized quite some time ago with only a fraction of horror that he almost longed for the times they would get high together and have deep conversations about life while they looked up at the stars. The boy no longer annoyed him to no end with his "I don't give a shit what you think" attitude. He actually found it...intriguing. And his new sense of style did indeed do justice to his appearance, as much as he loathed to admit it.

When he really did take a moment and stop to think about it, it all made perfect sense. He had developed feelings for the utterly famous Harry Potter, the 'Boy Who Lived', the 'Hero of the Wizarding World', precious fucking Potter.

These feelings had to end. Right now.

"It never meant shit, Potter. You were just there to satisfy my physical needs when I needed you. I have no feelings for you and I never will. I'm your fucking teacher. You are a mere child in my eyes. An exact replica of your father. You will never amount to anything in my eyes. Our relationship is purely professional and nothing else. Do you understand me?" He spat out, inches from the boys crestfallen face.

Silence rang in his ears as the boy stared up at him for a long moment before exiting the room without a word, a crestfallen look on his face. Severus waited a few seconds before getting up and walking into his own personal bathroom. He placed several locking and silencing charms on the door before stripping down to nothing and stepping inside the shower. He sat in the bottom staring blankly ahead until the hot water depleted. It grew freezing cold, pelting into his skin like sleet on a wintery day.


	14. Chapter 14

The next few weeks passed by as slowly as humanly possible. After having his heart ripped out, stomped on, crushed again, and replaced back in his chest in a tangled web, he had been doing his absolute best to get over Seve-Snape. He still had the tendency to call the man by his first name when thinking about him, or talking about him, or worse, talking to him. It definitely needed to stop.

He had made it clear that he had absolutely no feelings for him. That he had just used him to satisfy his needs when he had been under the influence of drugs. Harry felt so utterly stupid for even thinking for a single moment that he had cared for him in that way. That he had felt something for him. All those looks, all those moments where they had seemed to connect perfectly, he had just imagined them in his state of loneliness. When it all came down to it, he didn't mean shit to a single fucking person.

Drugs and alcohol were what kept him going most days. He had smoked his way through his entire bag of weed and had actually had to resort to buying another bag from a stranger off the street one night. He had been sneaking out of the house a couple of nights a week to drink at a bar only a few blocks away. Either Snape had no knowledge what-so-ever of his actions, or he didn't even care enough to attempt to stop him.

Either way, he wasn't complaining. Although, it was hell having to go through frequent attacks of his mind whilst still hungover from the night before. Despite everything, he had somehow managed to improve his Occlumency skills and could now block Snape from entering his mind ninety percent of the time. He hadn't experienced anymore visions or nightmares lately, either.

In less than twenty four hours he would be boarding the Hogwarts Express. In less than twenty four hours he would be back at Hogwarts. In less than twenty four hours, life would return to normal.

Harry frowned as he folded up a pair of socks and tossed them into his trunk. He wasn't sure if he was ready for life to return to normal. To have to get up at a certain time, go to classes, obey the rules, be confined within the walls of the castle. He didn't want to feel like a prisoner in the place he called home, and he had a feeling that was exactly what was about to happen once he returned.

He lazily threw a few more items into his trunk before getting bored and flopping down on the bed. Reaching underneath his mattress, he pulled out a tray Andy and himself had stolen from a fast food restaurant earlier that summer. He was halfway through rolling up a fat blunt when Snape tapped lightly on his door.

"Come in" He called, raising an eyebrow.

The other man never bothered him unless it was time for a lesson. He didn't even bother to call him for meals anymore. When he smelled food, he just wandered into the kitchen and grabbed a plate of whatever was cooked. Things were awkward and strained between the two and he would rather have things return to normal. Normal meaning completely hating each others guts, insulting each other twenty four seven, and disagreeing on everything. He would rather have that any day of the week than this awkwardness.

He heard the door creak open, but he didn't glance up as he continued to break up a small bud. Snape cleared his throat and he could hear him shifting from foot to foot, as if he was nervous about something.

"So...are you all packed for tomorrow?"

"Let's cut the small talk, Professor. What do you really need to talk to me about?"

He finished rolling the blunt and looked up, licking the tips of his fingers. He had been speaking to the man in this way every time he tried to talk to him about something non school related. He figured that the best way to get over his feelings would be to completely distance himself from the other man. Go back to treating each other as a student and teacher should. It was hard, but it was the only option.

He faltered a little in his cockiness as he caught sight of the older man. He was leaning against the door frame, looking utterly defeated. His long black hair hung down in his face and his pale legs shook a little in his cargo shorts. Their eyes connected and it took all he had to immediately return to what he was doing, instead of getting lost in their emptiness.

Pulling a lighter out of his pocket, he sparked the blunt before lighting it and taking a hit. He outstretched his arm to Snape, who was looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face. He didn't really blame him, considering what had happened the last time they had smoked together. But honestly, it looked like he could do with a pick me up at that moment. Just as he was about to pull his arm away, he surprised him by plucking it out of his hand and taking a few hits before passing it back over.

"What I needed to speak with you about is what's going to happen when we return to school." He paused for a moment to glance over at him. Harry nodded at him to continue on, wondering just where this was going.

"First of all, we need to talk about your lessons. You have improved a lot with Occlumency, which is why I proposed to the headmaster that we stop them all together. He was enthused to hear of your improvement, but he insists that you still have at least one lesson a week. We will continue with your defense lessons as well as Potions. Fridays will be off days and on Sundays your lesson will take place in the morning, as to give you the rest of the day to catch up on school work. Being your teacher for six years now, I know that you have a tendency to..."

He paused here, looking him up and down in a way that made him extremely self conscious.

"-wait until last minute." He drawled out whilst taking another hit.

"Do not." Said Harry

Snape let out a sort of snort before passing the blunt back over to him. He licked his lips before bringing it to his mouth and taking a hit, blowing the smoke out through his nostrils as he pinched it in between his thumb and pointer finger.

When he looked up, he caught the other man looking at him and playing with his bottom lip. He stopped as soon as he turned and jerked the rollo out of his hand. Harry narrowed his eyes, noticing his breathing was quicker than normal. Well, well, well...if he wasn't mistaken it looked as if Severus was checking him out.

"Something...wrong?" He asked. Only it sounded more like a statement than a question.

"What? Oh me. No, I'm fine Har-Potter."

He smirked as he inched a little bit to his left, their knees nearly touching now. "Are you sure? I mean, you did just almost call me Harry."

"It was...a mistake." Severus said, beginning to falter now.

Harry worked his bottom lip in between his teeth before lifting his hand to Severus' forehead. "Hm, you do feel a little bit warm. Maybe that's it." He shrugged and took another hit, taking note of how glassy the mans eyes were getting.

Excusing himself to go to the loo, he shut the door behind him and removed his shirt. He brushed his teeth with the toothbrush that he had been keeping in the cabinet and fixed his hair with his comb. Teasing Severus was definitely fun, but he wondered if there was any possible way anything could happen between them tonight. He sure as hell wasn't going to bed without trying.

He walked back through the open door, closing it lightly behind him. Severus glanced up at him before glancing back down at his cigarette. "I'm-I'm gonna go turn in now. You probably should too as we have to be up early in the morning." He started to rise from the bed.

"Oh, okay. I was about to load up the bong, but I guess I'll just smoke in here alone."

"Well, I presume it won't hurt to stay up just a few minutes later."

Harry smirked as he loaded the bong, knowing he had him right where he wanted him.

"And then...THEN the guy falls over on the floor and starts sobbing because he thought he WAS the glass of orange juice."

An hour or so had passed and Harry was entertaining him with stories from his summer. Due to their intoxicated state, conversation had carried easily. He was laying flat on his back while Severus sat next to him. The man accidently fell backward as he shifted around, landing on his side facing toward him, laughing the entire time. Harry laughed along with him, but soon stopped to stare up at him.

"It's nice to see you laugh." He whispered almost inaudibly. "You should do it more often."

"I do smile often." Severus shot back with a mock glare.

"Well, I never see it."

"My smiles are not reserved for you."

Harry pouted "Ooh that hurts."

Severus gave him another glare and swatted at his arm. Harry laughed out loud and clocked him in the shoulder, perhaps a little bit forcefully as he found himself being drug off of the bed by his legs. He delivered the man a swift kick in the shin and was immediately dropped to the floor. He smirked, thinking he had won, but was shocked when a weight pressed itself down on him a moment later.

Severus grabbed his hands and pinned them down over his head. He kicked at him with his legs, but all the man had to do was sit on them to make Harry completely immobile. He kind of wished the man would release him because he could feel his erection beginning to grow inside of his pants and he didn't want the other man to notice, but at the same time...he sort of did.

"Let me go!"

Now Severus was smirking down at him. "Well, well, well. It seems as if someone needs to learn how to control themselves."

Never before had he been so mortified in his life. He struggled to get up, but the man held him firmly in place. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, wishing he would just let him go.

Out of nowhere he felt Severus' hot breath on his neck. His eyes flew open and connected directly with deep black orbs, filled with a hunger he had never seen before. As Severus pressed his body farther down on his, he couldn't help but to throw his head back and bite his lip. The man was clearly just as excited as he was and their erections touching didn't help the matter. Was his professor actually going to do something? Forget about his teaching status? Forget about the fact that he claimed he had no feelings for him? Or was he going to pull away at any given moment?

His internal questions were answered not a moment later as Severus suddenly leaned down and captured his mouth with his own. Almost immediately, his entire soul was lit on fire. It continued to spread throughout his body as they roughly clashed tongues together. He bucked his hips upward, desperate for more. Severus responded by grinding their crotches together, leaving Harry unable to suppress a deep moan.

After a few minutes spent in this position, he felt his heart drop into his stomach as his professor rolled off of him and got to his feet. He made no attempt to move, fearing the worst was about to happen. He was surprised when the other man grabbed his hand and pulled him upward, pushing him up against the wall and turning the lights out with a wave of his hand.

Harry took the lead this time, shoving him backward toward the bed in between short kisses. He pushed him down on the bed and climbed on top of him slowly, fingering the material on his thin long sleeved shirt. He moved his hands up under his shirt, surprised at how toned his muscles appeared to be. Their eyes met and he somehow couldn't continue anymore.

Knowing he would probably regret it as soon as he woke up, he removed his hands from underneath his shirt and rolled off of him, sitting up straight.

Severus sat up with him, straightening his shirt and looking at him questioningly.

"I-I don't want to do something I'm going to regret. Something that...something that will only hurt me more in the end."

He was quiet for a long moment, staring back at him with his usual blank expression.

"I understand." He finally replied, starting to move off of the bed.

Harry reached out and grabbed his arm in a fit of panic. Severus stopped moving and turned back toward him.

"Please...stay." He felt like such a fool for practically begging the other man to stay by his side, but he figured that this would be the last night they would ever be this close again. School started tomorrow and Severus would once again be his professor. Also, Severus would be sobered up in the morning and probably horrified with himself for his actions. He quickly turned over toward the wall, completely mortified.

To his utter shock, he felt the weight of the bed sinking down next to him and the mans shoulder just barely grazing against his own. They lay there in silence for several minutes, even though he knew that the other man was awake. Harry eventually felt himself beginning to drift off into blackness, the warmth from Severus' body keeping him in a safe place.


	15. Chapter 15

Authors Note: I'm sorry if this chapters really boring, but I just wanted to get Harry back to school and attempt to clear the air between him and Severus! Things will definitely be more interesting next chapter! If you read, please please please review. You guys' comments are what keep my writing.

Okay, so...I usually don't post things like this, but I have a video that I recommend each and every one of you watch. Copy and paste this into your browser: /ibVlVzGI9y0

No other gay rights video has effected this in any way and I felt like I just had to share it!

Oh, and as always, I do not own Harry Potter

Harry sat next to the lake, staring out over the water. It was chilly outside, and he shivered a bit as he had forgotten to put on a jacket. He checked his watch, noting that it was quarter to seven. The train should be arriving in Hogsmeade at any moment now.

Severus and himself had arrived early that morning, and he had spent the entire day roaming across the grounds. While it did not appear so to any onlookers, he was less than enthused about his return to school. He missed his Muggle friends terribly as well as the freedom to be under the influence whenever he wanted.

There were very few people whom attended this school that he did not want to hex these days, and even fewer that he wanted to have an actual conversation with. Severus, Malfoy, and the twins might just be the only exception to this. Wow. He wondered what Ron would think if he could hear his current thoughts. More than likely, he would pass out at the prospect of Harry becoming friends with two Slytherins. Oh god. What would happen if people ever found out about his feelings for Severus. Not that he was planning on telling anybody. Ever.

His thought was broken as he sensed another presence closing in on him. Sure enough, when he looked around, he saw the man whose very existence he was beginning to curse standing a few feet away from him, leaning against a large tree trunk. He had yet to change into his usual robes and Harry had to look away quickly as he caught sight of him in his Muggle clothing.

"How long have you been standing there?" He asked, allowing himself to briefly glance up.

"Only a few moments. What are you doing out here? The train should be arriving at the station any moment now."

Shrugging in response, he turned his gaze back to the lake. After waking up to an empty bed this morning, not a single word had been spoken about the night before. It hurt and confused and frustrated and pissed him off to no end. Severus obviously did have feelings for him, but he obviously didn't want to be with him. Or did he? He was sick of not knowing.

He lit a cigarette with shaking fingers. "Severus...we need to talk."

The man omitted a deep sigh before taking a seat next to him and running his hand down his face in a manner very unlike the Severus Snape he knew. For the first time in all the years of knowing him, he appeared to be nervous. "Harry I- we can't do this. We really cannot do this."

Harry did not react, he simply looked at him.

"I am your teacher. I am twenty years your senior. I am a Death Eater" He spat bitterly before continuing. "Even if these things were not a factor, there is too much going on in the world. The Dark Lord continues to rise and I have to continue to act as his spy. I cannot have any distractions in my life. Besides, I do not do relationships. Not since...I just don't. I...you have been through a lot, Harry. Too much for your own good. I have grown to care for you, as well as your happiness. This friendship that we have began to develop is something I wish to pursue if you will allow it."

He nodded in understanding before abruptly jumping to his feet and tossing his filter into the lake. Now that he knew where they stood, he just wanted to be alone. Screw the feast. A knife was currently ripping itself through his heart. He was upset beyond reasoning, and even he did not understand the impact that this rejection was having on him. A month ago, he would have keeled over laughing at the thought of having feelings for Severus Snape.

Severus stood up with him, eying him with not a hint of expression on his face. A gust of wind blew by and he shivered as the cool air hit his bare skin.

"Where is your jacket?" Severus asked indignantly.

Harry shrugged, wanting to get away as soon as possible.

Severus sighed deeply before coming to stand behind him. He immediately tensed up as he heard a zipper unzipping itself and his arms being shoved through two holes. Looking down, his heart sped up as he realized that he was wearing the mans black jacket. The one from that night. Just the reminder of that night was suddenly enough to make him nauseous and he pulled away, mumbling his thanks.

He only made it about a foot before a hand seized his upper arm and forcefully held him back. He whipped around and caught his breath as their faces touched. A tiny gasp escaped his mouth as a strong, but gentle hand brought itself up to his chin. Had he not been rejected less than five minutes ago? Maybe Severus was going mad. Yes, that absolutely had to be it.

"Do not be upset or angry with me. I want you in my life."

His jaw nearly dropped at the scene in front of him. Never in his life had the man sounded like that. His voice full of emotion and on the verge of begging him.

"I want you in my life too. I am upset, but it will pass. I would indeed like to be friends."

Severus opened his mouth to speak, but quickly released him and jumped backward. Students voices were coming from the path that led to Hogsmeade. The train must have arrived without them noticing. Harry quickly changed into his robes behind a bush and then made his way over to the steps to wait for his friends as Severus hurried inside to seat himself at the staff table.

The students filed in past him, some calling out to him, some giving him dirty looks, and some of the younger ones growing strangely quiet and wide eyed. Crabbe and Goyle filed by him along with the rest of the sixth year Slytherins and he was surprised to see that Malfoy wasn't with them. The blonde boy was a few meters behind them, walking completely alone. Harry was surprised when he came to stand in front of him.

"Potter."

"Malfoy." He inclined, tilting his head. "Why didn't you come in with the rest of the Slytherins?"

The boy merely shrugged before turning the topic of conversation back to Harry. "Why didn't I see you on the train with the Mud-Granger and Weasel?"

He raised an eyebrow, having caught onto the fact that Malfoy had almost called Hermione a Mudblood, but had stopped himself at the last moment.

"I did not ride the train. I floo'd here with the person I stayed with this summer instead."

Malfoy nodded slowly, giving him a strange look. "Well, better get going. See you, Potter."

"See you."

Not a moment later, his friends came into view. "Harry!" Hermione flung herself on him as if she hadn't seen him in years. He hugged them all back tightly, smiling despite his previous thoughts. They all headed inside and took their places at the Gryffindor table, with the exception of Luna.

Fred and George came to sit across from him just as McGonagall led the first years in. He only half watched the sorting and lazily clapped along when a student was sorted into his house. As soon as the sorting was over, Dumbledore stood up deliver his usual beginning of term speech. Harry allowed his eyes to wander the room as he spoke of curfew, punishments, and not going into the Forbidden Forest.

Only when Severus was announced DADA teacher did he snap back into reality. Without giving it any sort of thought, he stood up and began enthusiastically clapping. Only after a few seconds did he realize that he was the only one apart from the Slytherins doing so and tons of eyes were on him. He sat back down and glanced up at the staff table. Surprisingly, Severus was looking back at him with a half smile on his face. He openly glared at the man before turning back to the food that had now appeared in front of him.

"Uh, mate. Are you feeling okay?" Ron asked.

Harry scooped some Shepherds Pie onto his plate. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You just gave the greasy dungeon bat a standing ovation, that's why!"

Within an instant, he had turned in his seat and rounded on Ron. "Don't call him that. I'm not even fucking kidding with you. You don't know him. You know the appearance that he lets off, nothing more. So just keep your fucking mouth shut from now on."

Ron grew silent for the rest of the meal. Conversation continued, but there was an awkward silence about the air. When Dumbledore finally dismissed them, he held back until most of the students had exited the hall, waiting for a certain potions master to notice him waiting by the door.

The man finally noticed him and broke off his conversation with Dumbledore to come over to him. He missed the way that the old man looked extremely confused as Severus walked away, before noticing the direction he was going and smiling to himself.

"Professor Severus Snape, Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

Severus gave him a little half smile. "Hopefully I will be a better teacher than your previous instructors. Especially that beast of a woman."

"You'll be great! I have no doubt about it."

The other man didn't answer, but he could have sworn that he saw a red tint to his pale cheeks.

"Seriously though, why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise." He stated.

Harry smiled. "It sure as hell was." He glanced around the Great Hall, noting that they were the only ones left aside from the headmaster and a student whom he was having a discussion with. "Well, I better get going so I can force myself up tomorrow. Congratulations, Severus." He allowed his hand to linger on his shoulder for a moment before walking off, missing the way the other man stiffened at the touch.

By the time he made it up to the tower, the common room was completely emptied. He made his way up to his dormitory, trying to be silent as not to wake any of his room-mates up. Seamus was already out like a light and Neville was laying in bed reading a book on Herbology. Ron's bed was mysteriously empty. Casting a glance over at Deans empty bed, he felt a pang of sadness rip through him like a knife, After sharing a dormitory for six years, it was so strange to not hear the boy snoring or ranting about his Muggle parents. He did smile a bit as he noticed the West Ham poster still hanging respectively on the wall by what had been the boys bedside table.

He slipped his pants and shirt off, flopping down on his stomach in only his boxers and drawing the curtains around his bed. Checking his watch, he realized that it was only nine thirty at night. God, this shit blew. It was so early and yet the entire castle seemed to be in bed. Sober. He could not wait to ask Fred and George about the parties that supposedly took place on the weekends. He hadn't been to an actual party since the night before his birthday. Way too long.

Rolling on his back, he cast a charm to get rid of the smoke before lighting a cigarette. He lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling and thinking. Out of nowhere, the curtains were ripped away from his bed and he jumped, drawing his wand out. It was Ron.

"God dammit, you scared me. What the hell?"

"I just wanted to apologize-" Ron stared down at his hand. "Since when do you smoke?"

Harry sighed, not in the mood to get a lecture tonight. "Since a few months ago. But anyways, what were you saying."

Ron backed away slowly, shaking his head. "Nothing. I'm going to bed. Goodnight." He lay down in his own bed, roughly drawing the curtains up around himself.

He put his filter out in the ashtray he had produced from his bag, setting it down on his nightstand. The only house elf that would clean their tower anymore due to Hermiones S.P.E.W. bullshit was Dobby. There was no way he would ever tell on him for doing anything bad.

He lay back down again, wondering just what the hell his friends problem was. He tossed and turned for over an hour, unable to sleep. Finally, he pulled Severus' jacket from the pocket of his robes and lay in across his body. The scent filled his nostrils and he was asleep within minutes.


	16. Chapter 16

Authors Note: Chapter 15 has been revised! I apologize for the confusion about Dean. He did in fact die in a previous chapter. I wrote his name out of pure habit, but again, it has been fixed! Not a lot going on in this chapter, but SNARRY ACTION and lots of arguing next chapter!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Harry Potter.

Harry thought he was dreaming when we woke up at six o'clock the next morning. He had not risen this early in years. Surprisingly, he felt immensely refreshed after getting a full nights sleep. Then he remembered he had lessons today and groaned out loud. He cast a glance around the room not surprised to see that the others were still sound asleep. Ron was half hanging off of the bed snoring, and Harry was tempted to rudely awaken him as payback for pissing him off last night.

He refrained from this as he made his way past the beds and into the bathroom. He took a fifteen minute shower and used a blow drying charm on his hair. Pulling his robes on over his head, he looked down disgusted. He would rather wear Muggle clothes any day of the week. He used his magical comb to touch up the green in his hair, cleaned his infected lip, and applied his usual makeup to his face. By the time he was done, it was only six forty five. Another hour and fifteen minutes before breakfast started. He made his way out of the dormitories and through the portrait hole, deciding to watch the sun rise by the Black Lake.

He took a seat by his favorite tree and lit a cigarette. Pinks, yellows, oranges, and purples blended together to create a beautiful sight before his eyes. Birds chirped overhead and he allowed himself to relax for the first time in months. It felt absolutely wonderful.

Only when the bell rang to signal the start of breakfast did he reluctantly take one last drag of his wine flavored cigar before heading inside. The Gryffindor table was nearly empty as it was still early. He took a seat in their usual area and nibbled at a piece of toast. Already bored and feeling like a loser for sitting alone, he took his I-Pod out of his pocket and inserted his earphones. What Happens At The Party filled his ears and he put his head down with a loud thunk.

A tapping on his shoulder interrupted his music sometime later. He pressed pause and looked up. A very bright eyed Hermione was standing behind him with a half asleep looking Ron by her side.

"There you are! We've been looking all over for you! Ron sent Romilda Vane up to my dormitory while I was still getting ready to inform me that you were missing!"

"Oh. I woke up early and went for a walk." He shrugged.

Hermione accepted this explanation and moved around the table to sit across from him. Ron remained standing where he was, looking very uncomfortable.

"Er-Can I sit here?"

"I guess." He mumbled.

An awkwardness hung about the air as they ate their breakfast. He had no idea what to say and he felt as if they had no idea what to say to him either.

"So, when did you do that?" Hermione pointed at his lip, finally breaking the silence.

"The night before I came to Grimmauld Place."

Ron grabbed his face before he could even register what was going on. "Bloody hell! What did you do that for?"

"Because I wanted to?" He shrugged.

"He's your best friend! Honestly, Ron. You think you would have noticed before now that he shoved a needle through his mouth!"

The morning post swooped in and he tuned their bickering out. It was getting quite old, honestly. He was mildly surprised as a jet black eagle owl dropped a piece of post in front of him. Never in all of his years at Hogwarts had he seen an owl that looked quite like the one before him. He quickly untied the rolled up parchment from it's leg.

_Harry,_

_ Your first DADA lesson will take place tonight. Meet me in my classroom at seven o'clock. Wear your cloak so you are not seen. The door will be unlocked if I am not there when you arrive. I advise for your own well being that you are punctual for once in your life._

_Severus. _

He finished reading and tucked the parchment into his bag, smiling to himself at the mans final comment. They really had came a long way in only a short amount of time. The owl hooted and stomped its foot impatiently. Harry had almost forgotten about its presence. He pinched a leftover piece of bacon in between his fingers and fed it to the bird.

The owl hooted softly and nuzzled his hand a little bit, showing its thanks. He glanced up at the staff table to find Severus watching him intently. He inclined his head to show that he had received the message before turning back to his friends.

They were watching him intently as well, but they hadn't said a word. The owl flew off, probably annoyed that he hadn't fed it anymore of his breakfast.

"So, was that letter from Professor Snape then?" Hermione asked.

He nodded. "My first Defense lesson is tonight after dinner."

Their conversation was interrupted by McGonagall coming around to pass out the time tables. He quickly scanned his, satisfied with his schedule for once. They had been granted many free periods for the year, which he was grateful for as he was sure he would need them.

The three of them headed off to their first lesson, which was, unfortunately, Potions class. By the end of the lesson, he was no longer dreading it. It had actually been...interesting. And he had won something! In Potions no less! The bottle of Felix would probably prove a good use in the near future.

His next two classes were pure hell to sit through for an hour and a half. When the bell rang to signal lunch, he darted out of the room. Ron and Hermione called after him, but he just kept walking toward the tower. There was no way he was going to make it through the rest of this day sober. He nearly ran into Malfoy as he was climbing the stairs. Just what was a snake doing so far away from the dungeons?

"Watch where you're going!" He called, only half angered. The boy honestly didn't annoy him as much as he used to anymore. It might just be his crazy side talking, but he sensed a major change in the blonde man.

"Potter! Wait up!" Malfoy called out to him, running to catch up.

"Yeah?" He asked curiously, wondering just what he wanted.

"Got any smoke?"

Harry grinned and led the way up to the tower. A few students were sitting in the common room, mainly third years. Upon seeing the Slytherin in their territory, they narrowed their eyes. Both of them glared daggers at the thirteen year olds. They seemed to shrink back a little in the shadows, not daring to say a word. He ushered Malfoy past them all and up the stairs to his dormitory. As predicted, it was completely vacant.

He crossed the short distance from the doorway to the trunk laying at the end of his bed. Opening it, he was pleased to see that Dobby had taken it upon himself to unpack his clothing and hygiene items,leaving the rest at the bottom of his trunk.

Unshrinking his duffel bag, he pulled out a small purple bowl so they could quickly hide it if needed. As he packed the bowl down, he caught the Slytherin carefully examining his surroundings. Apparently satisfied that he wasn't going to catch a disease, he sat himself at the foot of his bed.

* * *

><p><p>

"Shit! Come on, we're gonna be late!"

They ran as fast as they could toward the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. He knew that Severus would flay him alive if he was late for his class on the first day back! Dra-Malfoy and himself had lost track of time smoking in his dormitory and they only had a few minutes until the bell rang.

Malfoy reached the door to the classroom first and flung it open. They both ran inside, taking their seats on different sides of the room. Mumbling broke out as the sixth years took notice of the two sworn enemies arriving at precisely the same time, completely out of breath.

At first, he was joyous at the prospect of making it into the classroom before Severus. Until he spotted the man standing near the front of the classroom, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. He slammed the classroom door shut with a wave of his wand before addressing the both of them.

"Well, well, well. Nice of you two to finally decide to join us. Ten points from Gryffindor and Slytherin for your tardiness. Five more points for your little display a moment ago."

He glared down at his desk, the room completely blurry at this point. He said nothing, knowing it was best to avoid an argument at the moment. Severus' eyes remained glued to him for a long moment before he finally moved on.

"What's wrong with your eyes?" Ron mumbled the second their professor was out of earshot.

Shit. He had forgotten to put eye drops in to reduce redness. "Nothing. I just have allergies."

Ron seemed to accept this answer and turned his attention back to the front of the room. He didn't miss Hermione studying him curiously, though. He had really fucked up by forgetting something as simple as eye drops.

The rest of the class period consisted of Severus bad mouthing their previous teachers, attempting to scare them into performing their absolute best, and describing the curriculum they would cover that year. More than once, he caught the mans gaze lingering on himself. He tried his best not to let him see his red eyes. Malfoy kept catching his gaze and they both had to refrain from laughing every single time this happened. Maybe getting blown before class was a bad idea.

The bell finally rang, signaling the end of the lesson. He attempted to push past with the crowd of students before the professor could question him any farther about his lateness.

"Potter! Not so fast!"

He motioned at his friends to go on without him, groaning inwardly at the scolding that was sure to come the second they were both alone.

After what felt like hours of slow torture under the mans gaze, the classroom door shut and they were alone. He gasped as he was seized by the front of his robes. He looked down, absolutely refusing to meet Severus' gaze under these circumstances.

"You. Are. The. Most. Foolish. Boy. I. Have. Ever. Met." The man choked out, shaking his small frame back and forth for many seconds. He eventually released him.

"What are you on about?" He choked out whilst attempting to catch his breath.

"The fact that you and Draco waltzed in late, high as a pair of kites in the sky."

Shit. He had hoped that the man hadn't noticed his impaired state.

"Errr..."

The man rolled his eyes before sharply turning away and beginning to rummage through his desk drawers. After a few moments, he resurfaced with a small bottle in hand.

"Here." He said, thrusting it into his hands. "Put this in your eyes. Lots of it."

He did as he was told, blinking rapidly and wiping the moisture off of his face for a good three minutes after he was done. "Thank you." He said sincerely.

"You are welcome. Do try not to come to my class stoned anymore, won't you? Or any other class for that matter. The last thing I need is to open the Daily Prophet and see 'Golden Boy or Stoner Boy?' as the days top headline one morning."

As hard as he tried to stop the fits of laughter working their way through his chest, he failed miserably. He was laughing so hard he could hardly breathe. First at picturing the headline in his mind and then at picturing Severus' reaction.

"The-the C-Chosen one or the S-S-Stoner one." He choked out. "Sc-Scarhead or Pothead?"

The other man begin laughing with him and soon they were both in a fit. They clutched at their chest, trying to find air. As soon as one would calm down, the other would dissolve into fits of laughter once more, causing the other one to laugh again. They were nearly crying, rib cages aching with effort, but they could not stop. They remained utterly oblivious to the world around them.

"Ahem." A clearing of the throat brought them both back to their senses.

"Headmaster." Severus sobered up immediately, poker face already in place.

Harry took a moment to collect himself before turning around as well. The old man stood there in magnificent purple robes with half moons in various places. His spectacles were firmly in place on his crooked nose and his beard tied into a knot. He wore an expression of uttermost amusement on his face.

"I do apologize for interrupting my dear boys. I just needed to have a quick word with Severus."

He looked down at his feet, blushing red. Why did he fell as if they had just been caught doing something extremely bad? "I was actually just leaving, Professor." He mumbled, beginning to cross the room to the door.

"Oh, don't leave an account of me. It will only take a moment."

He glanced at Severus. The man was leaning up against his desk, cheeks still slightly pink from laughter. He raised an eyebrow at him, silently giving him the signal to go on.

"Oh no, I really do have to be going now. Break ends in just a few minutes and I have Herbology next. Have a good day, Headmaster. You too Se-Professor Snape." He nearly slipped up and called Severus by his first name in front of Dumbledore. He was pretty sure the other man probably would not care, but he knew Severus would more than likely flay him alive the next time they were alone as he was so intent on keeping their friendship a secret.

He quickly closed the door behind him and pressed his ear to the keyhole. Dumbledore was chuckling loudly. "Well, Severus. I am pleased to see that you and Harry have been getting along!"

"We simply managed to ah- come to a truce over the summer. Nothing to get worked up about, Albus."

The old man chuckled again. "Oh, I'm just merely curious my dear boy! We do have more urging matters to discuss, though. Have you heard the latest? It wasn't reported in the paper as the Ministry Of Magic is trying to keep it quiet, of course. I wasn't sure if Voldemort had mentioned it or not."

"The Dark Lord...has not mentioned anything?" He could hear the confusion in the black haired mans slightly quieted voice.

"Ah, I presumed as much. Well, there was an incident last night in Duff Town, which is not too far away from here.

"Incident? What do you mean incident?"

"Naturally, the ministry is deciding to blame it on Sirius rather than face the truth. I tell you, I don't know what it's going to take to convince these people. Fudge saw Voldemort with his own two eyes last year as did at least a dozen ministry officials. But anyways, where was I? Oh yes! There were several Muggles found dead or severely injured with their memories wiped last night. Many were tortured into insanity and others bodies had been completely mutilated."

"I-I had no idea." The mans voice shook slightly and he felt the urge to re-enter the room to wrap his arms around him. "N-none at all."

Harry jumped as the bell rang to signal break was over, but he didn't move an inch.

"Oh my! Look at the time! I must be going now. Minerva and I have a meeting with the board of governors about tightening security around the school."

He quickly flattened himself against the wall as the door handle turned unexpectedly.

"Oh, and Severus?" The man seemed to have paused with his hand on the doorknob. "Do let me know if you are called tonight. It would not surprise me."

He then came strolling out of the room, making a beeline for the left staircase. Harry quickly turned and began running down the right staircase as fast as he could, mind spinning with some of the things h had just heard.


	17. Chapter 17

"Stop! That's enough!" Severus shouted.

Harry dropped his wand. He had just sent the man slamming into the wall for the third time that evening, even though they were practicing disarming spells. "What in the bloody hell has gotten into you?" He lowered his gaze to the ground. Ever since he had overheard that conversation earlier in the day, he had been freaked out. He blocked every jinx the man threw at him as if his life absolutely depended on it. He had to admit he was a tiny bit embarrassed for his actions, though.

"Sorry." He mumbled, turning to go. An arm thrust forward into his chest, forcing him to halt.

"The Harry Potter I have grown to know and care about is not the Harry Potter I am standing in front of today. Where the hell is he?"

"I'm right here."

Severus looked him up and down for a long moment. "You overheard the headmaster and I's conversation this morning." He said nothing, just waited for realization to hit. Severus stood up and opened the door, beckoning for him to follow.

He did so with some hesitation, wondering what in Merlins name they were doing. Severus stopped in front of a portrait of Salazar Slytherin himself. He leaned forward and mumbled something he couldn't make out, but sounded suspiciously like a set of numbers, and the portrait swung open to reveal his living quarters. They were done up in the same colors as his home, furniture and all. The only difference he could pick out was that there was no television set and only one bedroom. He took a seat on the left side of the couch and Severus on the right. Silence ensued for a long moment before he finally broke the ice barrier that had developed between them.

"I know you're not a bad person."

The other man opened his mouth, but apparently changed his mind and shook his head instead. "How-I-I don't understand how you can know what you know and still say that. I-I'm a- I'm a fucking murderer, that's what I am! Torturing and killing innocent human beings for fun. I'm no better than that monster I also happen to call master. And you...you have the audacity to sit here and...and tell me I'm not a bad person!"

"Because it's true!" He jumped across the couch, harshly grasping the mans shoulders. "You are brave and honest and caring and possibly the most wonderful human being I have ever met!"

Severus stared straight ahead for a moment. Harry was glad for this as he was currently as red as a tomato. "Harry...I..." Je turned and surprisingly pulled him into a hug which Harry returned immediately.

"That means a lot to me." He murmured.

"You mean a lot to me."

Severus pulled him in closer, maneuvering so that they were both lying down. Harry buried his face into his shoulder and slowly snaked his arms around his firm waist. Lavender filled his lungs and his breathing thickened. This was where he belonged.

He awoke hours later, forgetting where he was for a split second. They must have fallen asleep together on the couch last night. Severus was standing in front of him, still in his clothing from the night before. His hair was tousled and sticking to his forehead. "You had better get going. It's after five thirty and I hope to Merlin none of your little friends have noted your absence as of yet."

Frankly, he could care less if they had. He wasn't their dog that needed to be held on a leash and monitored at all times. He forced himself to a sitting position. "Where do you keep the towels?" He asked.

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, I don't know. I thought I might fancy sewing a few together to wear as a new dress. Might really allow my homosexuality to shine through."

Severus raised an eyebrow. "Smart ass boy."

"What was that? I'm afraid I didn't quite catch that." He shot back, nudging him a little. He was completely flirting, but so what? It's not like he was foolish enough to believe that last night had changed things between- "I'll be returning to my dormitory now. Have a nice day, Professor Snape."  
>He quickly shut the door behind him, leaving behind a very confused Potions Master.<p>

The next few weeks passed by exceedingly slowly. Teachers were piling on homework, and he was still having nightmares. Rom and Hermione had became strangers, and only this morning, Stan Shunpikes body had been found. The drugs were all that kept him happy these days. He was still having lessons with Severus, but things had changed. They both knew it, but only Harry knew why for he occasionally glimpsed confusion and curiosity in the mans eyes when he addressed him as Professor Snape or when he left without a word as soon as the lesson was dismissed. Severus didn't even try to bully him in lessons anymore, he acted as if he no longer existed. Speaking of, said man had just swept into the Great Hall right past the Gryffindor table.

"Slimy old git." Ron had followed his gaze and was now glaring up at the staff table. "I-I mean..." He tried to correct himself, more than likely recalling the last time he had insulted the man in front of Harry.

"You forgot to add big nosed dungeon bat to that." Ron choked on his pumpkin juice and Ginny, Fred, and Seamus laughed. He cracked a smile, definitely not laughing on the inside. Truth be told, he missed the man terribly, but he need to keep his distance from now on;for his own sanity.

After falling asleep in each others arms, he had been almost sure that Severus could no longer deny what had obviously ignited between them, but, once again, he had been proven wrong. The rare moments of intimacy between them where he let his guard down were not worth the pain. He was sure of that.

"Hey, Ron?"

"Yeah?"

"Fancy going for a fly after dinner?" He asked, expecting him to decline.

"Yeah. Sure." He nodded.

They finished eating quickly and rose. Hermione beamed at them as they bid her goodbye. 'Girls are so weird.' He thought. They retrieved their brooms from the equipment shed and shot into the air. Harry zoomed around the pitch at top speed, flipping and diving. This was perhaps the only thing he had missed about the warding world during the holidays. He hovered in mid-air and lit a cigarette. Ron caught up to him and stopped a few feet away.

"What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Don't play stupid!" He spat, taking him by surprise. "You were off doing Merlin knows what this summer while you claimed to be 'studying'." He made quotations with his fingers. "You have a metal...thing through your lip, you smoke, you curse loads more, you dress differently and wear black shit on your eyes, and you used to act like Snape was your best mate! Who the hell are you?"

Damn. Since when had Ron grown a backbone.

"I-I'm right here!" He pointed to his chest "I'm still me, I just look and act a little differently. It's called change, Ron. Deal with it."

Ron wasn't having it so he decided to drop the act. "Look...this summer changed me. I mad loads of friends that I spent nearly every single night with-"

"Doing what, Harry?" Ron interrupted.

"Oh, you know. Just going to concerts and movies and things like that...and fine, we drank a little, but so what? Everyone does it. Plenty of people here do it."

"Like who?"

"Just...people." He stated impatiently. "And yes, I look different, but I only looked the way I did before because the Dursleys kept me under lock and key." They both grew silent and Ron huffed impatiently before leaning forward and clasping him briefly on the back.

"So it wasn't a girl?" He couldn't contain his laughter. After all of that, that was the only thing he really cared about. He sobered, closed his eyes, counted to three, and opened them.

"Ron, I'm gay."

Ron cocked his head to the side and rubbed his chin. "So...was it a boy?"

He nearly choked in relief. "You don't care? It doesn't bother you?"

"Of course not, Mate. You love who you love. Besides, Charlies gay, and so are Remus and Sirius."

"How do you know that?" He demanded.

"Well, it's obvious, innit? They're mad about one another. And if you take the time to think about it, they make the perfect couple- gay or straight."

Harry couldn't contain his happiness at having such an accepting, straight male best talked for many more minutes before hurrying back across the grounds, ten minutes to curfew. Just after they entered through the portrait hole, Harry pulled Ron aside from their peers.

"Don't tell anybody about Moony and Padfoot."

"Ooooh, so it is true!" He loudly exclaimed.

They promptly proceeded to wrestle on the floor. A few other boys began doing the same until McGonagall came in wearing a long night gown and screaming about earthquakes and hoodlums.


	18. Chapter 18

Fred pulled him aside after breakfast one morning toward the middle of October.

"First party of the year is tonight," He said with too much enthusiasm for it being so early in the morning. "Decided if you're going or not?"

"Of course I wanna go," He paused, waiting for the Patil twins to pass "but don't I need to be added to a list or something like that?" He asked, recalling their conversation from a few months prior.

"I will have to speak to the head of all of this and have her find you."

Her? The bell rang before he could inquire any further. He slowly climbed the stairs to the third floor. He had defense right now, and he was in no particular mood to be tortured for the next hour and a half.

If time was supposed to heal all, then why were there still days when just simply being in Severus's presence caused his heart to feel as if it were being ripped from his chest? All he wanted to do was find a way to move on, but that was proving to be impossible as the weeks passed by. They were still having lessons five times a week. He actually felt like his defense skills had improved, and he could now block Severus from entering his mind ninety nine percent of the time. He just hoped it would be enough when it came time to defeat Voldemort.

He strode into the classroom fifteen minutes late and sat down in his usual spot, luckily not spotting Severus anywhere.

"Nice of you to finally join us, Potter," He inwardly groaned as Severus stepped out from his office. "Are you incapable of telling the time, or do you just take pride in showing off in front of your classmates?'' He drawled on.

Everybody was looking at him by now, but he wouldn't give them the satisfaction of letting it bother him. He pulled his notebook out of his bag and began copying notes off of the board.

He heard Severus sigh, probably disappointed that he hadn't gotten the reaction that he was looking for. "Thirty points from Gryffindor for your tardiness, and another thirty for your inability to answer a simple question."

He looked up at this point, openly glaring at the man. He received an identical glare in return. In other words, things were back to normal.

As soon as the bell rang he shot out of his desk, swinging his bag over his shoulder and mumbling an excuse about forgetting his homework in the tower to his friends. He ducked into an empty alcove for a quick cigarette as they currently had a twenty minute break before their next class. As he headed toward the Transfiguration classroom, head considerably lighter and nerves considerably calmer, he was halted by Pansy Parkinson.

She quickly beckoned him behind a statue and he followed, looking around semi nervously. "Weasley said that you want to come tonight. Never took you to be the partying type." She remarked, pulling out a piece of parchment with a few dozen signatures on it. He signed the paper and then made a wizards oath, basically stating that he would never reveal any information about the parties, who attended, or where they took place.

He found it difficult to concentrate the rest of the day, too excited for tonights events. It had been nearly three months since he had attended a party, and he was going absolutely insane. It was no help that Andy filled all of his letters with stories of the crazy nights they were having without him. After two solid weeks without a drop of alcohol, Harry had resorted to nicking a few bottles from the kitchens when he went down to visit Dobby one night. The little elf had been more than happy to present him with enough alcohol to last him a few months at the very least.

He had taken to spending most of his weekend nights sitting in the common room with his classmates, waiting for everybody to retreat to their dormitories for the night so he could sneak out with a bottle hidden underneath his invisibility cloak. Normally, he lay on top of the Astronomy tower and stargazed for hours. He would stumble back to bed until the sun began to rise, sleep the day away, drag himself out of bed for dinner or a lesson, and repeat.

If anybody ever noticed his absence, then they didn't care enough to confront him. Ron and Hermione had definitely noticed that something was up, though. He didn't miss the looks they gave each other when they thought he wasn't paying attention, and he often caught them whispering together, growing abruptly silent the moment they saw his approach. It was getting old, in all honesty.

As soon as dinner ended that night, he headed upstairs to get ready. Not exactly sure what to wear, it took him almost thirty minutes to pick out his outfit; white skinny jeans and his zebra print v-neck. George knocked on the door just as he finished ready, and the small group of Gryffindors slipped out of the portrait hole and made their way to the fourth floor.

The party was in full swing when they finally arrived. Kids from various houses were dancing in large groups, people who would never dare to look at one another outside of these four walls were laughing together in the sitting area, and what looked like a floating version of beer bong was going on in the kitchen. Music blared from magically enhanced speakers and he grinned as he walked into the kitchen to find himself a drink. He browsed through the selections before pouring himself a glass of ale from the keg in the corner. Just as he was starting to feel like a loser for standing alone, he spotted a certain blonde headed boy.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't Draco Malfoy."

Malfoy didn't even attempt to conceal his grin as he turned around. "Ooooh, look! Is that the famous Harry Potter? With alcohol in his hand? Quick! Someone alert the Daily Prophet!"

They both cracked up, not paying a bit of attention to the looks of surprise coming from all angles. While house or blood status was not an issue at these parties, people were still shocked to see the two sworn enemies downright cracking jokes together. Suddenly annoyed with all the whispers and stares, either at the fact that he was here, or over him and Malfoy, he bent down to whisper in the other boys ear.

"Is there a private room anywhere around here?"

Malfoy slowly nodded, looking at him questioningly. He mimed smoking a joint as his excuse and the other boy laughed, motioning at Parkinson and Zabini to follow. He didn't fancy being stuck in a room with the other two, but really, what could he say? Besides, they hadn't bothered him one bit all term, which was actually a nice change in routine.

They walked through a door by the living room and flicked the lights on. Drunken, half hearted screams filled his ears and he had just enough time to glimpse two naked bodies tangled together before the door was slammed back shut.

"What is it?" Someone called

"Oh, nothing. Just Abbott and Jordan getting a little up close and personal in there." Malfoy replied

"Oh my god, again?" A Ravenclaw girl shook her head in disbelief

They eventually located an empty lounge by the kitchen and locked the door behind them.

"Last year, we caught them in that same predicament, what, probably four or five times?"  
>Parkinson and Zabini nodded in agreement.<p>

He pulled out the dimes worth of weed he was carrying in his pocket, realizing that he didn't have anything to smoke out of.

"Hold on a minute." Parkinson began digging through her purse and eventually came up with a wrap to put it in. He gratefully accepted it and rolled a fat blunt up for them all to smoke.

The four of them passed it around, and he made a mental note to find out where he could buy some more soon as his stash was nearly gone. If worse came to worse, he supposed he would write Andy and beg him to send some along with his next letter, but that was extremely risky and was his last resort.

He took one last hit before stubbing the end out and slipping it into his pocket for later. Harry made to open the door, but was stopped by Malfoy. The blonde dug around in his pocket and pulled out a small bottle of eye drops.

"If they realize that we're all stoned, they'll start asking for some. Fucking vultures."

They headed back to the party, Harry making a detour along the way to get himself and Malfoy a stronger drink. By the time he returned, Parkinson was going on about something, and the other two were staring at her as if she had just grown three heads.

"-don't know why you're looking at me like that! It isn't like I said I wanted to shag him or anything. I just said he was kind of cute. No harm done."

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that." Zabini mumbled.

He handed Malfoy the drink he had requested and sat, taking a few sips of his own. "Who are you talking about?"

"Terry Boot." Malfoy blanched.

He felt his face turning red as he recalled oogling the boy from a distance earlier in the week. He gulped down his drink to cover up his face.

"Look, Potter's blushing! He thinks so too!" Parkinson said with triumph. "Hmph. I suppose you have a better chance with him than I do anyway. He says he's bisexual, but rumor has it that he's actually never been with a woman."

"And who's to say that I haven't?" 

"Oh, so you mean to tell me that you're straight?" 

"Well...no." He admitted, too buzzed to care. 

"Thought so." 

The conversation ended at that. He sat back and mainly listened as they trash talked their classmates, a familiar warmness beginning to spread throughout his entire body as he finished off his third drink. 

After a wile, he left the Slytherins in favor of doing shots in the kitchen with the twins. They forced him to go to the dance floor after that, and he found himself grinding his ass against the person behind him. Strong male hands gripped his waist from behind. He spun around only to come face to face with Terry Boot. They stared at each other for a moment and then, hardly believing his nerve, he grabbed his hips and began grinding on him again. They danced together for many minutes, and they seemed to be inching closer and closer together as time passed by. The shots he had slammed down had gone straight to his head, and everything was blurry.

He suddenly felt lips on his own and he kissed back with full force, the urge to be wanted consuming him. As he wound his fingers through the other boys and led the way into the bedroom they had all smoked in earlier, he felt eyes burning into the back of his skull. Staring at him. Watching him. Judging him. He really didn't give a shit at the moment.

They didn't bother to turn on the light as they stumbled over each other and into the bed. They kissed for what felt like hours, but suddenly he wanted more. He wiggled out from underneath him and climbed on top, sucking at the boys neck. A moan came from underneath him, and he felt triumph in knowing that he could turn somebody else on. He reached for the buttons on Terrys jeans, but his hand was pushed away.

"I'm sorry, but I don't want to do anything I'm going to regret when I'm sober."

"It's a little late for that." He mumbled.

"I know I won't regret kissing you. I've been thinking about it for weeks, ever since I saw you at the welcoming feast."

"Really?" He slurred out, disbelieving.

Terry moved forward so their noses were touching, and Harry pulled him down for another kiss.

Maybe he was going to be able to move on after all. 


	19. Chapter 19

AUTHORS NOTE: Hey guys, sorry it's been forever since I posted a new chapter! My laptop was broken, but it's fixed now and I have tons of chapters I wrote out during that time to make up for it. Hope you enjoy them!

Oh, and I am trying something new in this chapter writing in different characters p.o.v. I really want you guys' input on whether you liked it or not and if its something I should continue to do with the story from here on out.

Disclaimer: Jk Rowling makes eight dollars a minute. I do not. Therefore I do not own Harry Potter. I do own any character you do not recognize, though. As well as the plot for this Snarry story.

Harry groggily opened his eyes the next morning, momentarily forgetting where he was. A loud snore erupted in his left ear and he turned toward its source. Terry was laying flat on his back next to him, still in a dead sleep. The nights events slowly began coming back to him. He recalled leaving Malfoy to dance with Fred and George. A body pressing up against his. Somebody initiating a kiss. He didn't really remember what had happened after that, but he was sure that they hadn't had sex. He knew that Terry had told him how much he had liked him last night and that he had admitted his feelings back. He wondered where things would lie between them now. Even he wasn't too sure of what he wanted at this point.

Quietly, he slipped out of the bed and padded into the adjourning bathroom, loving whoever had designed these quarters. After splashing cool water on his face and using a scourgify charm on his teeth, he carefully examined his reflection in the mirror. Dark rings had settled themselves around his eyes. On top of that he was as pale as a ghost and a giant hickey had formed on his throat. He felt nearly as bad as he looked. It was too bad Severus and himself were no longer friends; He could use a hangover potion right about now.

All he wanted was to go back to bed until tonights party, but he had his bloody Occlumency lesson just after lunch. He cast a Tempus spell and groaned as he realized it was only ten in the morning. The lesson wouldn't start for three more hours. He was going back to the tower to sleep this off.

He cast a glamour charm on himself, watching as the color returned to his face, the hickey became invisible, and the dark rings removed themselves. As quietly as possible, he pulled his shoes and shirt back on and left the room, casting a glance toward the still sleeping Terry before he left.

Many people were passed out on various pieces of furniture, not having been able to find a vacant bedroom the night before. A few were beginning to rise, looking as if they might start projectile vomiting at any given moment. The smell of breakfast coming from the kitchens filled his nostrils the second he stepped out into the corridor. Not even able to fathom the thought of food at the moment, he headed toward Gryffindor tower. He threw his invisibility cloak over himself before he entered the portrait hole.

Not many people were in the common room. He supposed the majority of them were either out on the grounds enjoying the nice weather or sleeping last night off. Ron and Hermione were sitting in armchairs by the fire, mumbling to one another and looking distressed. He knew that Ron had without a doubt noticed his absence when he woke up and saw an empty bed next to him. Then he hadn't shown up at breakfast...

'Oh well' He thought to himself. Maybe they shouldn't be so concerned with his every movement. He soon reached his dormitory, stripped down to his boxers, and fell into a much needed sleep.

It felt like only a few minutes had passed when he was awoken by the curtains being ripped away from his four poster bed. Blinding light from the windows hit his face and he buried his head under the covers, groaning.

"Harry!" Rons voice exclaimed " Merlin, we thought you were dead! Where were you? And why the hell did you sneak up here in your invisibility cloak?"

"Leave me alone, Ron." He mumbled. His head hurt so bad he could hardly even think.

"No. Not until you tell me where you were last night."

Harry forced himself into a sitting position. "I don't believe that's any of your concern." He said coolly. He cast a Tempus spell and cursed loudly as he realized he was going to be late for his lesson. "Thanks for fucking waking me up sooner!" He shouted as he scrambled into a pair of white skinny jeans and a emerald green v-neck Sirius had sent him a few weeks ago. He glanced in the mirror when he was done. He needed to put on foundation and his hair needed serious fixing, but he didn't have the time. Its not like he had anybody to look good for anyway.

"What the hell are you-?" Ron started

Harry cut him off. "Don't play stupid, Ron! You knew I had a lesson after lunch." He finished lacing up his leather boots and made for the door. Ron flung himself in front of him, blocking his path . "Get out of my way!" He tried to shove around him.

Ron held him back with surprising strength "No you fucking listen to me," He snarled, still gripping his arm. He was instantly silenced due to his amount of shock. In all the years he had known Ron, he had never once seen him this angry. He was shaking slightly and his face resembled the color of his hair. "There are people who actually give a damn about you, believe it or not. The darkest wizard of all times greatest ambition is to kill you, Harry! And what are you doing? Pissing your life away going to partys and getting drunk and smoking and doing god only knows what else... or who else!"

He had had enough at that point. So without much thought, he reached up and punched him flat across his jaw.

...

Severus sat at his desk, hands folded and glaring at the clock hanging above the door. Potter was thirty minutes late for his lesson. While he was mostly pissed off, he couldn't help but worry that something might have happened. He slammed his hand down on the desk after that thought. No. He did not give a damn about Potter.

The door opened at that moment and speak of the devil, it was him. The boy closed the door behind him and flung himself down onto the stool he usually sat on. "So nice of you to finally grace me with your presence, Potter."

Potters head snapped up and Severus was a little taken aback as he noticed a large purple bruise underneath his left eye and a scratch on his neck. He had to stop himself from rising from his chair and going to examine the injuries himself.

"Been dueling your little friends in the corridors instead of coming to your lesson? Ten points from Gryffindor." He said, knowing perfectly well that those injuries were not from dueling.

"Listen, Snape. I'm not in the mood for your shit. Lets just get started so I can get out of here and back to my life. I know you don't have one of those so you don't understand, but I do."

The bitter tone in his voice and the words being spoken stung at him, although he would never in a million years admit it. "Thirty more points from Gryffindor." And without further delay, he plunged into the boys mind.

He pushed into the very tip of his mind where the most recent memories would be. He watched as the boy argued with Weasley. It appeared that he had spent the night somewhere other than Gryffindor tower, and nobody had known where he was. Potter hit him in the face and they began rather violently fist fighting. The door flung open a few seconds later, there was a bang, and Weasley went flying across the room.

Finnagan and Longbottom were standing in the doorway, wide eyed. Finnagan was still pointing his wand in the air. Potter threw the red headed boy a look of deepest loathing before shoving his way out of the room, nearly knocking over a few first years as he stormed through the common room, ignoring Grangers calling for him.

"Who knew Weasley had it in him." He was back in the classroom now, and the boy was giving him a look of deepest loathing. He sneered back in response before invading his mind once more and pushing back a little farther, curious as to what Potter had been up to last night.

Potter appeared to be at some kind of party. He was on a crowded dance floor, dancing up against another body. Severus nearly continued on, thinking the memory was from this past summer, but he then realized that he recognized many of these faces. He watched as his students danced profanely, chugged from suspicious red cups, and carried conversations with people they would never dare to look at in the corridors. As a spy he was supposed to know everything, but he was utterly ignorant to these secret partys taking place in the castle.

He tuned back in on what was happening in just enough time to see Potter wind his arms around Boots neck. Boot leaned down and kissed Potter on the lips. They began kissing fiercely, oblivious to the stares and whispers all around. When they were entering the bedroom, Severus pulled out of the memory. It wasn't hard to imagine what had happened next. And as he did in fact imagine it, a monster slowly rose up inside of his chest, begging to be let out.

Potter had staggered backward a few steps, looking wide eyed. The room was so silent that a whisper could have echoed off of the walls. He took a few steps forward, forcing himself to keep in check. His anger was bordering on the edge of dangerous. He grabbed the boy hard by the collar of his shirt, pulling him close.

"Get. Out." He commanded in a deadly whisper "Now."

"I-"

"Your lessons are at an end, Potter," He said " I never want to see you inside this office or anywhere near it again." He released the boy and turned his back, not turning around again until the door had slammed shut. Severus stomped into his personal quarters and headed to the fireplace. He threw a handful of powder in, shouted "headmasters office!", and began to tumble through the grates, eventually stepping out onto a midnight blue carpet.

Albus was sitting in his desk chair, eating a Muggle snack cake and reading The Daily Prophet. He glanced up at the disturbance.

"Albus, I swear to Merlin I am done teaching that boy!" Albus opened his mouth to speak, but Severus held up his hand. "I already know what you're going to say. 'He needs to be trained in combat.' 'He needs to learn how to protect his mind from the Dark Lord.' Well frankly I could give a damn less. I quit!"

The headmaster was silent for a long moment, just simply staring at him. "Severus, have a seat."

Glaring daggers, he flung himself into the chair on the opposite side of the desk.

"Biscuit, Severus?" Albus offered

"No."

"Lemon drop?" The older man tried again, shaking the tin in his face.

Severus sighed loudly in frustration.

Albus put the tin down and looked at him seriously now, peering over the edges of his golden spectacles. "Why don't you want to teach Harry anymore?"

He took a moment to ponder than question himself, eventually coming to a conclusion that he really didn't like. "He's a selfish little brat who has no regard for anybody except himself. His arrogance rivals even that of his fathers. He thinks he is a pampered little prince who should get his every little hearts desire! Oh and this summer when he was supposed to be studying he was out partying with a group of Muggles! We risk our lives to protect him every day and this is the repayment that we get. He is careless and foolish and his father all over again!" He forced himself to stop speaking at this point, the anger beginning to overtake him again.

"Did you honestly think I let Harry go unsupervised at Privet Drive all summer long? I personally had Aurors popping in to check on him two or three times a day or so. I was quite aware of his reasons to stay in Little Whinging this summer. I merely thought that the boy had suffered enough and deserved a break. And Severus, I think we both know that he isn't pampered, nor does he think himself better than anybody else. Now please, tell me the real reason you don't want to teach him anymore."

It was everything he could do not to jump to his feet and begin cursing the man sitting in front of him. If it weren't for him, Potter never would have fallen into this life of partying. He wasn't stupid, he knew the boy had a problem. Severus knew that all teenagers liked to drink a little, but Potter was boarding on the edge of alcoholism. And Albus had just sat by and watched it all happen.

"I am not teaching him and that is final."

Without another word he floo'd back to his own quarters.

Two hours later found Severus standing in a long line outside of Traz, the wizarding gay bar in downtown London. When he made it inside, he began scanning the crowd, searching. Art, a man that had been a very close friend of John and himself back in the day, was supposed to be meeting him. They hadn't seen each other in a few months and Severus was glad for an excuse to get out of the castle and catch up with a friend. He could hardly see anything in the very crowded club. It was, of course, always completely packed on the weekends. The fact that the imbeciles had turned out all the lights and bewitched certain items to glow neon colors in the dark didn't help aid his search either.

"Severus!" A ringing voice sounded from behind him and he knew it was him without even turning around. Art was possibly the most flamboyant man he had ever had the pleasure of meeting. He wore tight pants, pink and purple floral shirts, and had such a high pitched voice he was surprised all the glass in the room didn't break when he spoke.

They said their greetings and he did his best not to flinch when the man clamped him on the back. He just wasn't used to physical contact after all of these years.

"What can I get you?" The warlock bartender asked them

"Oh, a pink flamingo for me!" Art giggled "I need something to go with my shirt."

"And you?"

"The strongest drink you have." Severus replied seriously.

He mainly listened to Art chat as they waited for their drinks. He was probably the most terrible gossip he had ever met, always seeming to know everything about everybody. It was quite entertaining at times. Their drinks finally arrived and he took a long gulp of his, already feeling the stress of the day melting away as the amber liquid slid down his throat.

A half an hour had passed and the two were deep in conversation about their old party memories when a throat cleared just behind him. A dark headed man who looked to be a few years his junior held out a hand to him.

"Hello, I'm Logan. Would you like to dance with me?"

Severus was a bit taken aback at the request. He sipped on his drink, hoping to buy some time. The younger man was quite handsome, but he was also a complete stranger. He didn't have anything to gain by this, but he didn't have anything to lose either.

"Oh, he would love to!" Art answered for him.

Severus tipped back his glass and drained its contents. 'Oh, what the hell.' Was his final thought before he slammed his glass on the counter and allowed himself to be led onto the dance floor.

...

Harry stood outside the door that had just been slammed in his face, gaping. While the two definitely hadn't been on friendly terms for weeks now, Snape had never acted like that toward him. Okay, that was a lie. The man had nearly sent a jar of dead cockroaches crashing into his head once after he had caught him snooping around in his penseive. He had been raging mad at him then, and there was no question of his anger this time, but for what reason? He contemplated this thought as he walked through the dungeons. A sudden realization hit him as he made it to the entrance hall and he stopped dead in his tracks. The look in his eyes when Terry had kissed him. The explosion that had occurred right after...Snape was jealous!

He tore out of the castle and began pacing the grounds, not even bothering to look where he was going. Walking usually helped clear his mind, but as of now it was making him even more angry. He was done. Done thinking that he might still have a chance, that Snape would ever pluck up the courage to just be with him. From now on he would not think of him. He would not think of how he missed his touch, the spark of electricity that ran from his lips to his toes when they would kiss, the way their bodies just seemed to melt perfectly together...

"ARGH!" He pointed his wand at an abandoned broom shed, blasting it into pieces. He blew up a few more objects before flinging himself down in the grass. That had certainly made him feel better.

"Oi! Potter!" He cracked open an eyelid to see Malfoy moving toward him. "Saw you blowing all that shit into dust particles," He said "Your reducto charms pretty decent."

"Thanks." Said Harry, stunned to get a compliment from the Slytherin.

Harry let his eyes remained closed as he lay flat on his back, breathing in the crisp autumn air.

"Soo, why were you blowing things up?" He heard a lighter flick and sat up immediately at the familiar smell of burning weed.

Malfoy chuckled at his actions before offering the joint to him.

"It was Snape," He admitted, taking a hit. It tasted like blueberries. "We were having a Defen- Remedial Potions lesson earlier," He lied "I accidently blew up a cauldron and he went mad. Threw me out of his office, said he was done trying to teach me when I so obviously lacked the competence to learn."

The blonde headed boy gazed at him for a long moment, expression unreadable. Harry couldn't help but wonder if he had realized that he was lying. Slytherins were the most cunning, after all.

A second later he had snatched the joint out of his hand, called Snape an ass underneath his breath, and began debating what to wear to the party tonight.

"You're the gayest straight guy I've ever met." Harry told him.

They walked back to the castle around dinnertime, remembering to put eye drops in this time. When they reached the Entrance Hall, they headed to their respective tables. Ron glared at him as he went by, and it was all he could do to keep from rolling his eyes. He sat with Fred and Lee Jordan, who urged him not to let 'Ickle Ronnikins' get to him. George was still upstairs sleeping his hangover off. Snapes place was mysteriously empty as well.

"Hey Harry, you coming?" Fred asked "We're going to go get ready."

At that precise moment, he locked eyes with Terry from across the room. He told them he'd be up in a minute, and gestured at Terry to follow him out of the hall.

When Harry apologized for leaving that morning, the other boy merely shrugged it off and asked if he was going to the party. They began climbing the stairs together in awkward silence. At least, the silence was awkward on his side. He was so confused as to whether he was supposed to pretend that last night had never happened or not.

"Yeah, I'm going. Are you?" He asked

"Do you even have to ask?" Terry grinned at him. Rather sexily, if he may add. "Err...Do you wanna...comewithme?"

Harry smiled for the first time that entire day. "Do you even have to ask?" He replied.

Terry said he'd meet him at Gryffindor tower in an hour then turned off to go to Ravenclaw Tower. He hurried off to get ready, realizing that he hadn't even showered today. Oh god, what if he had smelled like alcohol or worse?

...

Hermione jumped up as she saw Harry come in the portrait hole. He glanced in her direction before making a beeline for the staircase. She was having none of it and charged up after him.

She burst in through the door to the sixth year boys dormitory. Harry was in the midst of standing in front of his wardrobe, pulling clothes out and throwing them on the bed. He'd jumped when she had came into the room. She pointed her wand at the door to the bathroom as well as the door she was leaning against.

"You're trapped."

He sighed in her direction and continued to match a pair of black jeans with holes in them with different shirts. She sat down on the edge of the bed and watched him. She had noticed his complete change in appearance on his birthday. No longer did he wear his cousins old t-shirts and baggy trousers. He wore tight, brand new clothing. He was hardly ever seen in robes, except in classes where they were mandatory. He no longer wore his wire framed glasses that made him so recognizable. He had gotten a lip piercing, although why anybody would ever want to stab a hole in their face she would never know. He fixed his hair differently and put colored streaks in it. And most strangely of all, he wore makeup sometimes. Not a full face, thank heavens, but foundation and eyeliner. She was a girl and even she only wore eye makeup on special occasions.

Even weirder was the way his personality had spun completely around. He didn't tell her or Ron anything anymore. They were supposed to be his best friends, but she didn't even know who Harry Potter was even more. She felt like most of the conversations he had with them were strained or just about completely pointless none sense. He no longer confided in them about his dreams and visions, his lessons with Snape, his theories about Voldemort and what he was up to, or his love life anymore. Ron had confided in her last week that he often wakes up in the middle of the night on weekends and Harry isn't in his bed, but when he wakes up he's there asleep. It appeared that last night Harry hadn't bothered to come home and all and she wanted to know why.

"Harry." She said to get his attention. He looked up and her, seemed to realize he wasn't getting out of this, and sat down on a black mushroom chair he had apparently brought with him. "Where were you last night? Please don't get mad at me like you did at Ron." She decided not to chew him out for the fight just yet. But make no mistake was he going to have his ass handed to him when she was done.

He gazed at her blankly for a moment before pulling a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and lighting one. Ron had told her about how he'd caught him smoking the first day back, but she had never actually seen him smoke until now. It just made her feel like she didn't know him even more.

"If I tell you the truth, you have to promise not to go running to McGonagall or anything like that."

She couldn't believe he thought she would actually do something like that. While she did hold a very serious regard for most of the rules, she would never turn one of her friends in.

"I won't. Go on." She urged

He got back up and began trying out different pairs of shoes to go with the "Nice Guys Finish First" shirt he had just picked out. She wrinkled her nose as she got the meaning.

"I went to a party and got too drunk to walk back here so I crashed there. It isn't a big deal. You guys don't need to worry so much. I can take care of myself believe it or not."

So that explained it. All of the weird behavior. All of his night long absences. The way he just looked so dead some mornings while other mornings he seemed to be bouncing off the walls. The red eyes he frequently had that he claimed were allergies. Harry was using drugs and alcohol.

"Where was the party at?" She asked casually

"I can't tell you that." He said at once

She narrowed her eyes. "You can't tell me or you won't tell me?"

"I can't tell you." He explained "I had to take a wizards oath saying I wouldn't reveal the location, anything that happened there, or the people that were there."

She accepted his answer, understanding how a wizards oath worked. She had read ahead to the last few chapters of her Charms book and tons of bad things can happen to you if you break one, most commonly death, but she didn't think they would take it that far. Then again, if the oath was created by a group of Slytherins...

"Okay, answer me this then. Is that all you do is drink? You don't do-other things?"

Her worst suspicions were confirmed when all of the color drained from his face and he turned away abruptly. She walked up behind him and gently touched his elbow, taking it as a good sign when he didn't throw her off.

"What else have you done?" She asked, not sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

"Just smoked a little weed." He replied. She felt her heart soar with relief. She had thought he was doing something more serious, like shooting up or snorting cocaine. Her aunt sometimes smoked Marijuana to help with the sickness her cancer gave her, so she didn't think it was entirely that bad.

"Look, it's not a big deal."

Before she could reply, the doorknob started jiggling and she quickly unlocked it. It was Fred. Or George. She could never tell for sure until they were standing next to each other.

"Hey Harry, we're about to leave." Fred or George said "Terry's waiting for you down in the common room." He looked like he was about to say something else, but then noticed her presence and ducked out of the room.

"SHIT!" Harry scooped up his clothes and ran for the showers.

She watched him go, wondering just why Terry Boot was waiting for Harry in the common room. Ron came in the door, jumping as he saw her sitting on the bed. "Bloody hell! What are you doing in here?"

"I was just up here trying to talk to Harry." She said, hoping he didn't get angry. All last year she had noticed the anger that crossed his face every time he caught Harry and her alone in a room together, fearing his worst suspicions had occurred. She knew it was because he was mad about her. She was absolutely mad for him too, but was waiting for him to be the one to admit it. That was the boys job, after all.

"Oh. How did that go?" He snickered, not getting the usual look of anger across his face. Her heart drop a little bit and it took her a moment to realize that she was disappointed that he wasn't jealous. Maybe she had waited too long and his feelings had changed.

"I finally got him to admit that he's been going to secret parties every weekend. I tried to find out where, but he said he'd taken a wizards oath."

"Typical." Ron grumbled, not looking that surprised.

She raised her eyebrow, suspisions arising. "You don't look very surprised."

"I knew he partied this summer with his 'new best friends' or whatever, but I didn't know it was still going on."

Hermione shook her head, angry at Harry. He had mentioned his new friends to them many times, but had never gone into detail about what they had done together. Now she knew why.

After Ron put his books away they headed back down to the common room. She located Terry standing by the door looking extremely uncomfortable. Many people were glancing and whispering in his direction, wondering what the Ravenclaw was doing in their tower at eight o'clock at night. Hermione walked over and told him that Harry was in the shower and would be down in a minute. She led him over to the couch Ron and Neville were occupying. "Hey guys, you know Terry, right?" They nodded in response, staring up at the dark headed boy. "He came to get Harry, but he's still upstairs getting ready."

"Where are you guys going?" Ron blurted out. Hermione glared at him, which caused him to recoil back a little.

He was saved from having to answer when Harry came pounding down the stairs. "Hey, I'm really sorry," He apologized to Terry "Someone," He threw a look at her "Kept me from getting ready."

"It's fine." Terry laughed as they glared at each other, but Hermione could tell by his expression that he wasn't really that mad. Hermione watched him turn to Harry and stare at the bruise underneath his left eye. "What happened to your face?"

Harry and Ron both looked down and remained silent. Hermione, having wanted an excuse to bring up the fight anyway, stood up and pointed a finger at the pair of them. "These two idiots decided to fight each other today."

"Well maybe he shouldn't have called me a whore." Harry spat bitterly

"Well maybe you shouldn't have punched me in the face." Ron burst out

They both rose from their chairs, fist clenched to their sides. She came to stand in between the both of them. "Both of you sit down!" Shockingly, they obeyed her. "You two are the stupidest, ignorant boys I have ever met! You're supposed to be best friends and you're going around punching each other. No, Harry shouldn't have hit you Ron, but you shouldn't have said what you said to him either. You both need to suck up your pride, apologize, and move on!"

The two boys remained silent, glaring in opposite directions. Harry stood and grabbed Terrys arm. "Come on, we should get going. They exited through the portrait hole and Hermione rounded on Ron.

"Can't you just be civil?"

Ron glared at her too before moving to go sit with Parvarti, Lavender, Seamus, and Dean. She saw him begin engaging Lavender Brown, who so obviously had a crush on him, in conversation. Great. Her best friend and the boy she was in love with her both angry with her now.


	20. Chapter 20

AUTHORS NOTE: Thanks for the reviews guys! They really are what inspire me to keep writing or to put a new chapter out sooner! I hope you guys like this one. I've been writing little pieces and putting them together for a wile now. I know it's kinda late, but it's also longer than usual!

Disclaimer: Not mine.

"Oh my god. I am so sorry!" Harry began apologizing profusely as soon as the portrait hole swung shut behind them.

He could not believe his supposed friends behavior! The only reason he had even answered some of Hermiones questions had been in the vain hope that she would leave him alone, but no. She had made him late meeting Terry. Oh, Merlin had better help them if they'd said or done anything offensive toward him in the common room. And just who the hell did Ron think he was trying to pick a fight with him when he had a busted lip and a bandage on his hand He really hadn't planned on telling Terry about the fight either, but Hermione had just loved an excuse to bring it up!

"It's fine, I swear," Terry assured him "Damn, I didn't think Weasley had it in him."

"Hey! Whose side are you on?"

Terry didn't reply as they jumped over a trick stair and switched staircases. Harry glared at him back in indignation. The boy grinned at him "I'm only kidding. He's always seemed like kind of an arse to me."

Harry snickered at his comment. Normally he would have felt slightly bad, but not after todays events. He could care less if he spoke to Ron ever again at this point. Well, maybe that was putting it a bit harshly, but he still didn't want anything to do with him anymore.

When they finally reached the party, it was completely packed. Malfoy had said that more people turned up on Saturdays, but he hadn't expected to not even be able to walk through the place. "Want something to drink?" Terry called into his ear as they shoved their way through the door. Harry nodded in the process of stealing the only remaining seat in sight for them. "What do you want?"

"Surprise me." He said. Terry shoved his way through the crowd into the kitchen. As Harry looked around the room, he realized that there were actually only ten or fifteen more people there than last night. It must look like more because everybody was either in the living room or the kitchen right now. People generally didn't disappear to the bedrooms and lounges until much later.

He felt a weight sink down next to him and looked around, his face more than likely rendering in shock as he took in the familiar blonde headed girl with the butterbeer cork necklace sitting next to him. "Luna? What in the hell are you doing here?"

"Well I would think that would be obvious, Harry." The girl said with a smile. "I've been coming since the beginning of last year. Never seen you here before, though. " He gave her a good looking over as she started telling him about looking for Wrackspurts with her father in the south of France over the summer. She had been the last person he had ever expected to turn up here. "-didn't find one, though. Daddy said they may have migrated to a warmer environment for the summer. We're going to go back at Christmas for another look."

He was spared from commenting on the story as Terry chose that moment to return with their drinks. He didn't know Terry that well, but he hoped that he wasn't one of the boys who called her Loony Lovegood or contributed to hiding her things. "Hey Luna" Terry called over the music that had just risen by about ten notches

"Hello. I was just telling Harry about searching for Wrackspurts over the summer, but I don't want to keep you two. See you later!" He smiled at Terry in appreciation as she dashed off, glad that the boy he liked was nice to his slightly odd friend.

Terry handed him a plastic cup with a greenish blue liquid in it. "Err, what is this?" He asked.

"My special drink." Said Terry "Go on, try it." He urged as he continued to look at it skeptically.

Harry raised the cup to his lips and took a cautious sip. It tasted like kiwi and you could hardly tell there was in alcohol in it. "This is really good!"

"Told you."

They sat together sipping on their cups for a few minutes as Harry recounted exactly what had happened between him and Ron earlier that day. Terry was threatening to find him and throttle him for insinuating that he was a whore when some of the boys friends made their way over.

Michael Corner, Maria Glossop, Padma Patil, Lisa Turpin, and a brunette boy whose name he did not know. "Hey guys, you all know Harry, right?" All except the dark headed boy nodded and greeted him in some way.

"I am Ryan Forbes, by ze way." He said in a heavy French accent "You probably don't know me. I went to Beauxbouttons until my fourth year."

"Nice to meet you." Harry shook his hand and they all chatted for a few minutes about idle school gossip. He didn't miss the way Maria and Padma gave them knowing looks as they walked away. They had been at the party last night and had more than likely witnessed the two of them heading into the bedroom together.

Harry tipped back the rest of his drink and stood up. "I'm going to go get another drink. What do you want?"

"Surprise me." Terry said, giving him a look that was dead sexy perhaps without even meaning to.

He shoved his way through the people and grabbed a six pack of beer off the nearest counter. The Weasley twins halted him in the kitchen doorway.

"Soo...how's it going?" Fred inquired

"How is what going?" He asked, although he knew damn well what they were on about. They each raised an eyebrow at him in unison. "Fine! I'm nervous as hell. Happy?"

They laughed at him and made ridiculous "awwing" noises. He glared and attempted to shove his way in between them. Although he would never admit it, he actually liked that they treated him like a brother with their teasing and what not. George grabbed ahold of his hand and forced something into it. He discreetly looked around before opening his palm. It was half of a little white pill. "It's a bit similar to a pill that Muggles take for anxiety...what's it called? Zenex?" He looked at his twin for help. Fred shrugged his shoulders and Harry had to control his laughter as he realized what pill they were actually talking about.

He popped the pill in his mouth and swallowed it down with a drink out of Freds cup. They clamped him on the back as he excused himself and headed back toward the sitting room. In his absence, Malfoy had taken the empty seat next to Terry and Parkinson, Zabini, and that Ryan guy had settled themselves on the couch across from them.

"Ah, Potter! There you are. Boot said you were going to get him another drink, but that must have been almost ten minutes ago."

He leaned over the blonde boy and handed Terry the six pack. "Fred and George held me up." He said, only for Terrys benefit. "Thanks for stealing my seat, by the way, Malfoy." He added as an after thought.

Already beginning to feel his nerves melting away thanks to the pill, he lit a cigarette before promptly walking around the couch and sitting himself on Terrys lap. Not a word was said about his actions, but he could practically feel Malfoys smirk on him and Parkinson appeared to be holding back from snickering. The position he was in wasn't very comfortable, but he didn't want to creep the boy out by full out leaning backward onto him.

To his shock the boy put one of his arms around his waist and offered him a drag off of his cigar.

"Weasley have anything to say for himself when you got back?" Malfoy asked

Not wanting to get into any further discussion about the matter in front of the rest of the Slytherins, he shook his head. Desperate for a change of topic, he looked around the room, finally zeroing in on Hannah with her friends, pointedly ignoring Ernie who was only a few feet away.

Pansy snickered loudly as she realized what he was looking at. "Oooh, I love how she's acting like she doesn't even know him. Ha! We all know she'll know who he is after a few more drinks. It's a pity that he's with a little slut like her."

"Oooh look who has a crush on a Hufflepuff!" Nott teased her and she punched him in the arm.

"Ha! You didn't deny it!" Malfoy joined in and got a blow to his shoulder a second later.

Harry laughed along at them all fighting like brothers and sisters. Strangely enough, it made him have a urge for old times with Ron and Hermione. They were the closest things he had ever had to a brother and sister, just as Molly was the closest thing he'd ever had to a mother. Man, they'd had a lot of fun times together now that he thought of them all. Having snowball fights, throwing bugs on Hermione and running away, dunking each other in the Black Lake, sneaking out underneath his cloak. He was starting to feel things he didn't want to feel so he slammed down the rest of his beer and opened a new one, settling his back against Terrys chest. He didn't like feeling things.

…...

Severus was having more fun than he'd had in years. Usually he didn't allow himself this luxury as there was no telling when the Dark Lord might call on him, but as there was some sort of attack going on in America tonight that didn't involve any of the inner circle members, he figured he was safe. And Merlin had he needed a night to get away from everything. The Dark Lord had summoned him four or five times in the past month, an extreme even for him. After he had been instructed to make countless potions, the reason behind these frequent summonings had became quite obvious; The Dark Lord was planning something.

He had discreetly tried to find out just what that was, but had received nothing in response except a few rounds of the cruciatus curse. It was only at the meeting the night before that he had overheard their plan to raid a magical school in North America. The thought of taking so many innocent lives made him sick to his stomach and he was glad not to be a part of such a terrible thing. On top of the Dark Lord, Potter was driving him absolutely crazy. He sneered at the mere thought of the boy that was going to be the death of him and tossed back another shot of Firewhiskey.

He had been dancing with Art, the strange man, two of their friends that had shown up, and a few of the mans friends for over an hour now. They had all taken a break to get more drinks. Severus was boarding over the edges of tipsy at this point. He figured he had better slow down if he didn't want to be vomiting all over himself at the end of the night.

The dark headed man smiled over at him and he found himself smiling back. They had discussed the minor details of their lives as they slow danced together. His name was Logan Hunt. He worked at St. Mungos as a healer, had never been married, had no children, and played the piano in his free time, a hobby which they both had in common. Severus had told him his name and place of employment as well, careful not to let anything slip that he might not want anybody to know. There was something so alluring about this man.

"Want to go outside for a smoke?" Logan asked

He nodded in agreement and they excused themselves from the rest, receiving lots of "oohs" and knowing looks. Severus rolled his eyes at their all acting like five year old children.

They exited the loud club and entered the much quieter alleyway outside. A few people were outside having a smoke as well and a group of drunk men could be heard singing half a block away. He motioned for Logan to follow him and they concealed themselves behind a little brick wall. He pulled a pre rolled joint from his pocket, lit it, and took a few hits before passing it over. Severus couldn't help but shiver in his short sleeved shirt. London was freezing on this particular night and he hadn't been thinking sensibly when he had dressed himself.

"Are you cold?" The man asked

"A bit." He replied.

He was surprised when Logan moved a few inches closer to him and put an arm around his shoulders. While it was true that he was warmer, the action felt completely foreign to him and made him a bit uncomfortable. They joked around a bit about Art and the guy he had been dancing all over just before they left as they passed the joint back and forth between them. When it was almost gone, Severus put it out and slipped it back into his pocket.

Logan pulled out a pack of weird looking cigarettes and offered him one.

"What are these?"

"They're called Djarums. I got them in France on holiday."

Severus took one and lit it. It was pretty nasty, but he didn't want to be rude so he forced himself to take a few drags. "So...do you travel a lot?" He asked in an attempt to keep the conversation going.

"Kind of. I try to go to a new place at least twice a year. I think the world is way too big to not try to see as much of it as you can before you die."

He liked that answer. Traveling was one of his most enjoyable past times, but he rarely did so because...well, how would it look for him to go alone? John and himself had gone traveled to numerous destinations over the years. Romania for Christmas, Greece in the spring, America for the new year. Even when his partner had fallen ill he had still insisted on continuing their travels with no regard to the strain it would put on his body. Severus could even go as far to say that it was one of his guilty pleasures.

"I'm going to Turkey for the holidays. Maybe you could come with me." Logan said

"Maybe." He agreed, even though he had no intention of going anywhere with a complete stranger. But then again, who knew? Maybe they wouldn't be strangers by then.

They went back inside the club and he noticed how Logan kept his arm around his waist as they walked. He didn't really mind that much, but he didn't want his friends to excite themselves with the idea of them being an item. Logan steered him over to the bar and they each ordered another drink. He pounded it down and ordered another one. Just when he was thinking that he wasn't going to have anymore to drink for the rest of the night, Art yelled out "shot time!"

Everybody near the bar cheered in response. Severus had absolutely no idea who half of these people were, but they all clinked glasses together and downed the burning amber liquid.

When he finally allowed Logan to lead him out onto the dance floor many minutes later, his head was spinning and the room was becoming blurred. He reached out and latched his arms around the other mans neck mainly to keep his balance and mainly because he could no longer resist his handsomeness. The man gripped his waist tightly and began to dance against him. Too far gone to give a damn about his dignity, Severus began copying the dance moves that he had often seen the older students do at the school dances.

And then, out of nowhere, a pair of lips connected with his own.

….

Harry drunkenly giggled as Terry pulled him into an empty room. It was close to two o'clock in the morning and the party was still in full swing. The past few hours had passed by in a total blur. He had sat on Terrys lap for the majority of it, chatting with whoever was sitting near them. They had danced for a little wile and he had played a game of beer pong- Gryffindor against Hufflepuff. The Hufflepuffs had actually won. Who would have ever thought?

Terry shut the door behind them and he found himself pressed up against the wall. Their lips met and they stumbled over their own feet in the darkness, trying to locate the bed. Terry lightly pressed him down and climbed on top of him. He did his best to control himself as they kissed for many minutes. After a wile Harry slipped his tongue in the boys mouth. The other boy mimed this action and he continued to gently massage his tongue with his own, doing his best to ignore the arousal building up inside of his pants. He nearly let out a gasp of surprise when Terry slid his hands up underneath his shirt and began feeling his chest. He slid both of his arms around his back and up his shirt, pulling him in even closer if that possible.

They kissed for what felt like hours and he didn't want to stop. It had been so long since he had felt close to another human being on any level. He pretended to be some hard ass who didn't need a relationship, but he was such a hopeless romantic. He did need this. He wanted this. Terry wouldn't do what Snape did to him. At least, he hoped not. His heart really couldn't afford to go through that kind of damage again.

Eventually they broke apart, both gasping for air. Harry shifted into a more comfortable position in the middle of the bed and Terry scooted in closer to him and draped a leg over his own.

"What-what exactly is this?" He finally asked the question that had been on his mind all night.

"What do you want it to be?" Terry asked.

He didn't know how to respond to that because he honestly didn't know. He was so terrified to get close to anyone, but he wanted to get close to this boy. He felt like he could with just a little time, but there was no idea if Terry even wanted to be in a serious relationship right now. And he supposed he wasn't really looking for a serious relationship either. Oh, he still believed in loyalty and honesty and all of that, but he wasn't looking to date the person that he was going to marry at this point in his life either.

"Well, I like you. A lot. I kind of...want to be with you." He shut his eyes tight in embarrassment even though neither of them could see an inch in front of their face in the darkness of the room.

"Okay. Then we'll be together." Terry said. Harry inched over in the darkness and kissed him on the mouth, a cheesy grin on his face. "But, just one thing."

"Hm?"

"Are you open about your sexuality? Like would you ever walk around holding my hand and I don't know, slow dance with me in front of people? Because I'm very open about mine. If anybody has a problem with it then they can suck- well, you get the drift."

Harry snorted in laughter before assuring him that he was totally fine with public displays of affection. He just couldn't wait to see what would happen with the Prophet got ahold of this. A lot of girls would probably be disappointed too. Romilda Vane's face popped into his head and he suppressed a shudder.

Still very tipsy and in need of some rest, he stripped down to his boxers and climbed underneath the covers. He moved back over and lay his head on Terrys chest. He folded his arms around his waist and fell into a peaceful sleep.


	21. Chapter 21

I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Not a lot going on, but Harry and Terry make their relationship public and Rons pov!

Disclaimer: Not mine

The chaos he had been expecting broke out the moment he walked into breakfast on the following Monday morning. People stood up out of their seats to get a good look, pointed, yelled, and outright stared. It wasn't him they were staring at, but rather the hand intertwined with his own. Harry marched toward the end of the Gryffindor table, sneering at all those around him. Terry was mumbling "fuck 'em" over and over again as they walked. All around people were gaping in shock at their famous savior of the Wizarding world. The two of them speed walked through the aisle and flung themselves down across from the twins.

The not so quiet whispers floated all around the room. Every conversation within earshot seemed to be about him.

"I knew it! You owe me five galleons!" A Hufflepuff whispered to his friend who groaned before passing over a pile of gold

"There is no way. This is probably just another stunt for attention." Michael Coroner loudly yelled

"He never did seem that interested in me." Cho was telling her friend

"He's not gay. He probably just thinks he is." Said a fifth year Slytherin

Seamus was staring at him like he'd never seen him in his life. He didn't look repulsed or in shock, though. It was a look there were no words to even describe.

To his utter amusement, he noted that a few girls seemed to have actually burst into tears.

Nearly everybody in the hall was staring at him, but he didn't care. His eyes sought out the two people who even though he was utterly pissed at, he would always consider his best friends.

The look on Hermiones face was enough to make him immediately turn away and look down at his plate. It wasn't a look of anger, but a look of deepest betrayal. He had been prepared for her to scream at him or burst into tears at not being told such an important thing, but nothing like this. He glanced back over to see Ron whispering in her ear.

"You knew about this?!" She shrieked "You knew and you didn't tell me?"

Ron tried to grab her as she jumped to her feet, but she jerked away from his grasp. "Don't touch me." Hermione swung her bag over her shoulder and stomped out of the room.

Before she had even fully disappeared, a loud slam caused everybody to jump in their seats. Harry nearly died of shock as he turned towards its source. Snape appeared to have jumped up and sent his chair slamming back into the wall. Their eyes met as he swept from the hall, a look of deepest hatred in his face.

Harry smirked to himself as he turned back around and speared a sausage with his fork, beginning to eat as if two huge scenes hadn't just occurred because of him.

"What in the hell do you think that was about?" Fred asked

He shrugged in response. "No idea. You know the miserable old bat hates seeing other people happy."

"Maybe he needs a good shag." Terry commented

George choked into his bowl of cornflakes. Lee pounded him hard on the back . "EW! Thanks for the mental image." He said

"Anytime." Said Terry

Eager to change the subject, Harry brought up the Halloween dance that they had just learned would be taking place on the thirty first. His plan worked and everybody began enthusiastically discussing their costume ideas.

He tuned them all out, mind racing with all that had just happened.

The news that Harry Potter was gay and dating Terry Boot was the talk of the school for the next few weeks. Everywhere he went people seemed to be staring at him. Talking about him. Judging him. Whispers about his sexuality could occasionally be heard as he walked through the corridors. From what he gathered, the majority of people had either seemed to know already, or were still in blissful denial over the situation. The number of girls who still tried batting their eyelashes at him every day was sickingly high. Some of them would even do it with Terry sitting right next to him. It's like they were incapable of taking the hint.

To his utter shock, a few people had actually thanked him for being brave enough not to hide who he really was. An already open lesbian fifth year and a seventh year who had been wanting to come out for years were among these students. Seamus Finnigan had accosted him after dinner that same Monday and tearfully told him something he had never been prepared to hear; He had been in love with Dean Thomas, and the feeling was mutual. They had been in a secret relationship for a solid two years before the boys death.

Their story of struggle was so terribly heart breaking and Harry had done his best to give Seamus the courage to come out himself. The other boy was worried about the feedback he would receive. While there would always be the standard "homosexuality is gross and a sin" comments from people, being bisexual came with a whole new agenda. People tended to maintain the notion that bisexuals want to sleep with every person that they see, that they are too slutty to choose just one gender, and that if you're a boy who likes both, you're really just hiding the fact that you were gay. He could only hope that one day Seamus would learn not to give a damn what other people thought and do what made him happy.

At this precise moment he happened to be walking down the fifth floor hand in hand with Terry. It was Halloween and classes had been let out one hour early in order to allow students more time to get ready for the dance. A group of Hufflepuff third years openly stared at the couple as they passed by.

"Yeah, that's right. We're just off for a quick shag! Wanna come watch?" Terry called out over his shoulder.

Harry died of laughter as the girls grew wide eyed and scattered away. There were so many things he loved about Terry, his sense of humor being one of them. Things were just so easy and fun and light hearted between them. They partied together and laughed together and kept one another feeling alive. He liked the fact that things weren't serious between them. He didn't think he was ready for a relationship like that. Of course, they were both faithful to the other. Harry liked to believe that he would always practice monogamy with his partners.

They entered Ravenclaw tower and Harry flung himself down on his favorite dark blue love seat before anybody else could take it. Several students called out in greeting to the both of them as they went past. One of the many reason he would choose to be here over Gryffindor Tower any day was that they didn't receive any stares, glares, or prejudices here. In his own tower, this was not the case. The one and only time he had ever brought Terry into the common room, a group of second years had swarmed in and demanded to know what type of love potion he had him on. Ron and Hermione had both happened to be in the room as well, both glaring at him in either direction. He was no longer on speaking terms with either one of them. It was sad how he knew that things would never go back to the way they used to be.

"Get up, lazy ass. Lets go upstairs." Terry said

"Ya know, just for that I think I'm gonna stay here."

Terry raised an eyebrow. "Suit yourself. My _empty _bed in my _empty_ dormitory sounds much more comfortable, though." He whispered so only he could hear and turned away toward the staircase. Not needing telling twice, Harry bounded up after him.

...

Ron and the other boys headed upstairs to get ready an hour before the dance. He was so nervous that his body was trembling as he clumsily dressed himself. Tonight was the night that he was hoping to express his feelings for the girl he had been in love with for years now. Neville being the good friend that he was had helped set the entire thing up.

It had all started with Ron desperately coming to the other boy for advice as he no longer had Harry to confide in. This was the first person that he had ever admitted his feelings to out loud and he had been relieved when his room mate hadn't laughed at him, but instead said that he would be glad to help. After being told several careful instructions more than once, Neville had offered to help Hermione pick out her costume in Hogsmeade that weekend. To his surprise, it had taken little persuading for him to convince her to go as Juliet from that Muggle novel that he knew she loved. He had finally asked her what it was about when he had seen her re reading it for the hundredth time a few weeks ago. He remembered with a smile the way her eyes had lit up as she went on about secret love affairs and how romantic it was to die for the one you love. Personally, he thought they sounded like a bunch of nutters, but he was perfectly happy to play the part of Romeo if it would get him the girl in the end.

He had been overly confident about the situation all week, but now that it was time, he was having many regrets. What if she laughed in his face? What if, god forbid, she showed up to the dance with another guy? Neville and Seamus finished getting ready with thirty minutes left to spare and went to wait in the common room. He flung himself face down on the bed and groaned out loud.

He jumped a little as the door slammed open a few minutes later. He didn't have to lift his head to guess who it was. He could hear Harry opening and slamming drawers shut, cursing to himself every few seconds. Terry laughed at him as he frantically ran into the bathroom to shower. They were alone in the room together now and Ron felt extremely uncomfortable. This fight was by far the most serious and longest one they had ever had. He knew he shouldn't have made the comments that he did, but Harry also shouldn't have hit him either. They were both in the wrong and they both knew it, but were too proud to be the first to apologize.

A strange smell filled his nostrils and he sniffed the air curiously. He knew he had smelt it before, but couldn't remember exactly where. He sat up and saw Terry puffing on the end of something that resembled a cigar. While he had never tried drugs before, he wasn't completely ignorant and was able to put the pieces together quickly. Marijuana was the highest used drug among the Wizard community. He had caught his brothers doing it plenty of times and his great uncle Archie used to smoke out of a pipe all the time. Ron had suspected that Harry did it for quite some time now, but he had never had any proof of it until this moment.

Terry seemed to notice his presence at that moment. He moved as if to hide it behind his back, but seemed to think better of it and puffed on the end of it again. "Whoa. I didn't see you there. Are you not going to the dance?" He asked

"I'm going." He said "I'm just- procrastinating at getting ready I guess."

He quickly finished dressing and began examining himself in the mirror. He desperately wished he had a magical comb right about now. His hair just never seemed to lie flat.

Harry came bounding back out of the shower dressed as...a cat? Ron wasn't exactly sure. He was wearing tight leather pants with a leather vest. He had a tail attached to his backside, little cat ears, and whiskers painted on his face. His eyeliner was much heavier than usual, and his nose was painted black. Terry had apparently decided to go as a vampire. He was wearing black slacks and a black turtleneck with a red velvety cape on back. His hair had been charmed to jet black and was spiked. He had a set of fake fangs in and had painted his face with white powder and dark eye makeup.

His face grew somewhat red as he watched Terry checking his boyfriend out and he hurried to finish getting ready, hands beginning to tremble once again as it neared closer to the start of the dance. "Man, are you sure you're alright?" Terry asked, watching him.

Harry wheeled around, wide eyed. Apparently he hadn't been aware of his presence until just now. Ron watched his face travel from the thing in Terrys hand and back to him before realizing that he apparently didn't care and turning back to getting ready.

"No. No I'm not all right." He said, more to himself than anybody else. "I'm such a bloody idiot! Sitting here thinking I might actually have a chance." He sat down on the edge of the bed and put his face in his hands. Why had he ever been stupid enough to think that she would ever returned these feelings for him?

"Wait. What?! You're finally going to do it then? You're going to tell Hermione you're mad about her?" Harry exclaimed, speaking to him for the first time in nearly a month.

"How did you-?"

"Believe me, everybody knows. It's obvious by the way you look at her. And don't ever tell her I told you this, but I'm pretty sure she's got it bad for you too." Harry said

Ron opened his eyes and looked at the boy skeptically. Was he just saying that to make him further humiliate himself or was he being sincere? He buried his head back in his hands and waited for them to leave the room. A few minutes went by in silence before someone tapped on his shoulder. Terry handed him a fresh cigar with weed inside of it and a lighter. He stared down at them for a moment, debating on what to do. He had never done it before. What if it made him act dumb like he did when he had too much Firewhiskey? He cast a glance across the room. Harry was digging through his night stand and Terry was checking himself out in the mirror. They didn't appear to be acting much different than usual.

Not quite sure of what to do, he lit the end of it with the silver cigarette lighter and sucked on the end. The urge to cough hit him instantly, but neither of them had coughed so he forced himself to hold the smoke in. He did this two more times before Terry yelled "Hey! Haven't you ever heard of puff, puff, pass? Quit hogging the blunt." He stood and handed it back to him. Blunt. So that's what it was called. It didn't taste as bad as he thought it would and for some reason he felt himself becoming much calmer. The shaking in his hands had ceased.

Harry sat down on the edge of the bed with the blunt in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Rather than two puffs, he took more like five. "Don't glare at me like that." He said to Terry "Who's the one that just smoked an entire one to themselves?"

"Yeah, but it takes me more to get high than you. I've been doing it longer so my tolerance has built up."

Harry mock rolled his eyes in that direction. Ron hoped he was going to pass it to him next. He had a feeling he had the little plant to think for his sudden state of calmness. He did pass it to him next. It was little and singed his fingers as he held it. When it was too small to smoke, he awkwardly gave it back to Terry, not sure what to do with it.

They pulled out a strange glass object after that and began smoking out of it. He watched their movements carefully just in case. When they offered it to him, he clumsily lit it and inhaled the way they had done, but no smoke was coming out. Terry walked over and pulled the pipe looking thing out of the hole for him. "Now inhale."

He inhaled and the smoke filled his lungs. He sucked in as much as he could and held it there, eventually coming up in a coughing fit. Terry lay down next to Harry who was on his back smoking a cigarette. The room was silent and he suddenly felt very awkward. Of course things hadn't changed between him and Harry just because his boyfriend had smoked weed with him.

Ron checked his watch as he put his shoes on. Five minutes until they were going to leave. Vision slightly blurry, he finished dressing and walked across the room. He was surprised when Harry jumped up to prevent him from going out the door.

"Here," He thrust a small bottle of eye drops into his hand "Use these before you go out there. Trust me, you need them."

Confused as to why the hell he would need eye drops, he crossed into the bathroom and looked at his reflection. Well, he could definitely see why now. His eyes were bright red and glassy as if he'd been crying for hours. Worse than that, they looked nearly shut and it was a miracle he could even see. He held an eyelid open and put the drops in, blinking several times. He did the other eye and watched in the mirror as they slowly began to turn white again. After a minute or so, he looked as normal as ever.

Not that he felt too normal, though. His vision was blurred a tiny bit, but it was a good blur. He could still walk normally, but he did notice his speech was slower earlier when he was talking. Other than that, he was feeling fantastic. His body felt so relaxed and stress free, which was actually a rare thing for him. It was a bit like he was floating and he gained his self confidence and headed down to the common room. When he saw Hermione waiting for him by the staircase, he couldn't hide the smile that broke out on his face. Luckily, she was turned the other way and didn't notice.

"Nice costume." He said, finally reaching her.

"Ronald Weasley if you are making fun of me I sw-" She wheeled around on him and stopped dead when she saw his costume. She eyed him over for a good thirty seconds before a different look came over her face and she said quietly "Are you-? Did you-? I mean, you set this up..." She trailed off

"Yeah, maybe I did." He grinned

She was looking at him in disbelief. "But-why?

"I wanted you to go as Juliet so I could come as your Romeo." He blushed, but shrugged like it was no big deal. "Well, let's get going then, shall we?"

"Uh, yeah. Let's go."

He kept one hand on her arm as she led them through the crowded common room and the other in his left pocket, fingers crossed so tightly they were turning blue.

…...

I hope you guys liked this chapter! Please read and review.

Next chapter: Halloween dance, find out what happens with Ron and Hermione, Severus/Terry/Harry/ scene, and a certain Potion Master has an unfortunate revelation.


	22. Chapter 22

Harry and Terry waltzed into the dance thirty minutes late as usual. They had gotten a bit too carried away snogging in his dormitory and had lost track of time. By the time they had smoked another blunt, re adjusted their costumes, and walked down to the ground floor, the dance was in full swing. Harry shoved his way through the sea of people, pulling Terry along with him.

In light of the dance, all the house tables had been removed and replaced with a few dozen smaller round tables with black table clothes and orange chairs. The lights were out and hundreds of candles were hovering above their heads. Apples slathered in caramel, foaming bottles of Butterbeer, buttery popcorn balls, steaming hot cups of cider, and an array of both Wizard and Muggle sweets lay out on a large table at the back of the room. Many decorations had been charmed to hang from the ceiling or move about the room. The ghosts had even joined the party as well. It was pretty impressive, one had to admit.

They shoved their way through the first years standing in tight groups in the back, the second year boys devouring the desert table, the third years awkwardly bobbing their heads, the boys and girls each standing in separate groups, the fourth years trying to impress their friends with idiotic dance moves, right to the front where the older grades were dancing together.

For the next hour or so, the band played fast paced songs back to back. Harry was grinding his ass against Terry who had one arm in the air and the other wrapped around his waist. He knew his feet were going to be paying for it later on, but he was having too much fun to give a care. The song switched and everybody began moving in closer. Before he really knew what was happening, Harry was thrown into a grind train. Separated from Terry, he found himself in between Hannah Abbot and one of her Hufflepuff friends. He danced against them like crazy until the song ended, then went to find Terry. A slow song came on, but instead of dancing they got cold drinks from the refreshment table instead. Harry pressed a cool bottle of Butterbeer into the side of his sweaty neck. He glanced to his right just in time to see Ron shyly leading Hermione onto the dance floor.

"Come on!" He pulled a bewildered Terry away from the table and out into the sea of other couples. They positioned themselves directly behind the oblivious Ron and Hermione, just close enough to eavesdrop on their conversation. Hermione had a slightly small smile on her face as she slid her arms around his neck. Rons hands were slightly shaking on her waist; He was nervous again.

"Err-Hermione? There's something-something I need to tell you..." He had gained her fullest attention now, and Harry was starting to think he was going to back out.

"Well?" She asked after a long moment of silence

Ron opened and closed his mouth a few times, unable to get the words out of his mouth. Instead, he leaned down and kissed her on the mouth. Hermione looked shocked for a moment before throwing her arms around him and kissing him back with an enthusiasm he had never seen in her until now. The song ended, but the pair stayed rooted to the spot. He walked away after that, figuring he would just leave them to it.

"Let's go on a walk." He hissed in Terrys ear. The boy gave him a strange look, but obliged. They walked through the Entrance Hall and out the great oak front doors. It was chilly outside, but he was so hot that the cool air felt wonderful on his sweaty skin. As they walked through the small garden like area, giggles could be heard from the bushes every couple of feet. Harry stopped walking when he noticed half a head of silvery blonde hair poking out of the nearest bush. He threw an arm out to prevent Terry from going any further. "It's Malfoy" He whispered in his ear, pointing over at the spot. He counted down from three and cast a silent 'Levicorpus'. Malfoy was hoisted up onto his ankles, he screamed and frantically thrashed in the air. The girl who had been in the bush with him went flying past him, and he nearly died from shock as he got a good look at her face.

He grabbed Malfoys legs and lowered him back down to his feet. Malfoy looked at him in a state of panic and Harry decided not to mention the girl in front of Terry who was practically dying of laughter at the given moment. "Assholes" Malfoy muttered, flipping them both the bird.

"Should-have-seen your- face." Terry panted, bending over to catch his breath.

They walked back to the castle together, Malfoy glaring at them the entire way, although he didn't seem all that mad. If he would have pulled a stunt like that a year ago, they probably would have ended up dueling right then and there. Harry was glad that things had changed between them, though. They might not be best mates, but they were comfortable around each other. 'Malfoy could almost be considered a friend' He thought to himself.

They re-entered the castle and Malfoy headed into the Great Hall. Harry began to follow, but Terry grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into an empty alcove. He wrapped his arms around the boys neck, finding himself suddenly pressed up against the wall. Their lips met and he found himself immediately turned on. He pressed his thumbs firmly into Terrys hips and slipped his tongue inside of his mouth. After a moment, Terry pulled away. Harry nearly growled in frustration, but ended up having to stifle a moan as he began kissing, biting, and sucking at his neck. He had just captured the other boys mouth in his own once more when the hangings they were concealed behind were suddenly jerked aside. They jumped apart at once, a black robe coming into view.

* * *

>"Aha! Caught in the act. Ten points from-" The voice trailed off and started blankly at the pair for a long moment.<p><p>

Severus Snape liked to think he was a man of no emotions, so that's why he didn't understand the feeling he was experiencing as he stared at Potter and his boyfriend. His ribs all of a sudden ached, and his heart had slowed down a few paces. He felt like he had been kicked hard in the chest as he found himself out of breath, the pressure building up around his ears. The music blaring off all four walls in the background and the laughing voices could have been a million miles away, for all seemed to be forgotten under the circumstances. All that mattered was- wait. What? He mentally shook himself from side to side.

A feeling similar to the one he had just experienced occurred nearly every time he saw the pair together, and he couldn't for the life of him figure out the reason behind it. It wasn't like him and Potter were friends or anything of the sort. Potter meant absolutely nothing to him. The boy reminded him so terribly of his father that he could hardly stand to look at him. His arrogance was beyond even that of Sirius Black's. The boy thought he owned the entire world and all of its inhabitants. Severus was beyond grateful that he no longer had to tolerate the boys prescence in his lessons. The boy was arrogant, possessed no talent, and was the sheer replica of his bastard of a father.

A burst of anger slowly built its way up inside of his chest, threatening to explode at any given moment The two boys had quickly broken apart when he had ripped open the curtains, and now they both looked up at him. He wanted to begin screaming, but was afraid he would be unable to control his actions if he did so. Severus forced himself to breathe in and out. Boot had an "Oh shit we're in trouble" look on his face, but Harry didn't appear to be worried at all; His expression was completely blank as he stared straight into his eyes. A tiny smirk formed across his lips, but he didn't break eye contact. It was almost like an unspoken challenge.

"Potter." He finally managed to spit out "Disregarding the rules as usual. I conclude that your arrogance prevents you from realizing that the rules do indeed apply to the 'Golden Boy'" Potter glared back at him with cold hatred on his face. He ignored the pecuilar stabbing in his gut and sneered instead. He had purposely said the one thing that he knew would get to the boy. Potter absolutely hated being treated like he was anything other than normal. He hated the attention, the newspaper articles, the stares, the fact that he couldn't go anywhere without somebody wringing his hand. "I assume," Severus went on, beginning to pace back in forth for added effect " I assume you purposely placed yourselves in this area in the hopes that somebody such as myself would discover you and spread the word so you could receive more attention." He knew bloody well that was a load of bullshit, but he didn't care.

"Hmm, maybe you need to stop assuming things, Professor. After all, when you assume you make an ass out of you and me."

Something about the way Potter responded with such confidence in the face of his blatant defiance pissed him off even more than he already was. It was like he knew he could overstep the rules because he was Harry Potter, the precious savior of the Wizarding World who could obviously do no wrong. He slowly advanced forward until their chests were touching. He seized him by the front of his shirt, hard. "No wonder your Muggle relatives abuse you," He hissed "I would beat and starve you to death too if I had to deal with your bullshit every single day. No wonder you have to use drugs and alcohol to cope with all of your problems. You are the most ignorant, inconsiderate, nasty, little-"

"Severus!" A sharp voice cut through and he inwardly groaned. Of course Albus would choose this moment to walk into the conversation and only hear his response, not the cocky little comment that Potter had just made.

Reluctantly, he released his grip on the boy and spun around to face the old man. He was critically accessing the scene occurring in front of him. "What exactly is going on here?" Albus asked

"He's being a git like usual!" Potter shouted

"I caught him snogging Boot!" He yelled

They both spoke at once, then turned in unision to glare at the other. Severus knew he ought to be the bigger person and act appropriate for his age, but where Potter was concerned, there were great exceptions to this rule. To his chagrin, Albus merely assesed the scene for a moment before pulling Potter out of earshot. They mumbled together for a bit, but after a few minutes they were chuckling together under their breath. All seemed to be forgotten. Boot was standing awkwardly to the side, looking unsure of what to do with himself.

"Well, well I am glad that we have that settled." Albus and Harry walked back over to them. "I do hope there won't any be future occurances such as this? I'm afraid that would be terribly embarrasing for all three of us."

Harry and Terry both nodded quickly and said "no sir."

"Well then, off you go! Go rejoin your friends and have fun now. The dance will be over in about half an hour."

The two boys set off walking toward the Great Hall at a brisk pace. Severus kept watching as they took off running once they got far enough away, eager to rejoin their friends.

"Severus," Said Albus "Come with me."

He inwardly groaned to himself as they began climbing their way to the headmasters office. He knew he was probably due for a telling off, but why did it have to be right this moment? All he wanted was to retreat to his chambers and have a glass or five of Firewhisky.

They entered the office and Albus immediately offered him a tin of lemon drops. He shook his head, perhaps rather dangerously because the old man didn't try any furthur. Instead, he crossed the room, opened up a glass cabinet, and poured out a bottle of amber liquid and two glasses. He set one half full down in front of him. They silently clinked theirs together and Severus downed his in one long gulp. When he set the glass down, Albus was sitting across from him with his hands folded in front of him. Their was a rather long moment of awkward silence between them that he didn't like at all.

"Severus," Albus finally spoke. "I am at a loss for words at the moment." He didn't yell, but instead got that look across his face that he was very disappointed in him. Severus felt slightly bad about that, but didn't give in and look guilty in any way. Potter had deserved it.

"Headmaster, I admit that I may have been a little harsh, but you didn't here what Potter said to me before you walked in. You only heard my extremely unpleasant reaction to being the end of a foul remark." Severus tried to stay as calm as possible.

"I am indeed aware of what the boy said to you. I agree that it was the wrong thing for him to say to an authority figure, but I took twenty points from Gryffindor and gave him a warning. You said terrible things, awful things, Severus. Do you honestly think the best way to handle the situation was by throwing Harrys childhood up in his face? Did you not witness the abuse with your own eyes? Did you not come to me this past summer practically begging me to remove him from the home? So why come back months later to throw it back in his face? I would have thought that after your own childhood, you would be a bit more understanding." Albus finished quietly

Severus broke eye contact and lowered his gaze down to his lap. Albus knew that he hated discussing his childhood or pretty much any part of his personal life with anybody. He supposed that the fact that both of them were abused as children and had lost nearly everybody that had ever cared about them meant that he was supposed to be more sympathetic. 'Yeah, I wonder how sympathetic Albus would be if he knew that Potter was as high as a kite.' Severus thought to himself.

"Why do you suddenly show so much anger toward Harry?" Albus asked " Don't think me a fool, Severus. I had sensed that things changed between you two over the summer. You two were almost like friends, it appeared. So tell me, why can't you seem to stand the boys mere precense all of a sudden?"

Severus continued to stare down at his lap. "I don't know." He mumbled.

"Do you love him?"

He couldn't contain himself from snorting at the mere thought of loving a sixteen year old boy. Severus stood and leaned out of the tall window, breathing in the cool night air. That was all it seemed to take to cause him to go back in time.

' _Severus lay flat on his back on the roof of his home. Harry was next to him, staring up at the bright night sky. They were laying so close that their hips were touching and he was intrigued by the bolt of electricity that appeared to be shooting throughout his body. They passed his bowl back in forth between them. Truth be told, neither of them needed anymore. Checking his watch, Severus realized that they had both been stoned for hours at this point, but it only felt like a few moments had passed since they had been sitting in his living room._

_Harry rose up to set the finally cashed bowl on the table and lay back down next to him. They were even closer together now and Severus breathed in the smell of Hermes mens cologne, one of his favorites. _

"_Do you ever get horny when you're high?" A voice next to him asked out of the blue._

_He knew he should have immediately jumped up, demanded to know just what the hell he thought he was doing asking something like that. He knew he should be absolutely repulsed at this comment, but he couldn't help but find himself suddenly turned on. Merlin, this was so wrong. The boy was sixteen for christs sake! 'But you know that's the consent age, Severus.' The little voice in the back of his head taunted him. _

_Severus turned over onto his side, looking the boy straight into his emerald eyes. Now that he was up close, he could see that the eyes were so unlike the boys mothers and for some reason he became more intrigued at this realization. _

_He didn't know which one of them lurched forward first, but he didn't care. The moment their lips connected it was as if a light had suddenly turned itself on inside of his body. His very soul burned with a fire that both thrilled and terrified him to no degree. A passion that he hadn't felt in years was suddenly so alive within him. Severus climbed on top of the boy and began massaging his tongue with his own. His lungs were begging for air, but he ignored the feeling in favor of this moment. Harry moaned underneath him. No longer able to control himself, he moved his lips down to his neck, gently sucking and biting as he went. Hands suddenly grabbed at his ass, startling him a bit. Up until this point, Harry hadn't been touching him. The realization of what he was doing hit him like a train and he abruptly jumped from the couch, fleeing from the scene. His pride had got the best of him once more._

"Why would you ask me that?" He asked quietly, turning to face the headmaster

"Well you did just scream in the poor boys face because you caught him snogging Mr. Boot, did you not?" Albus asked in return

Severus turned back toward the window, not wanting the old man to see his face as a certain realization slammed into him like a ton of bricks; He was in love with Harry bloody Potter!


	23. Chapter 23

Harry's head was spinning as he hurried back into the dance with Terry. He didn't much want to go back, but it was ending in thirty minutes so he didn't put up a fight. They immediately resumed grinding as they had before, but Harry's thoughts were a million miles away. Why did Snape always have to be such a complete bastard? It was obvious that the man had a soft side, but why he thought it would kill him to let it show he would never know. Instead he felt the need to act like a total arse twenty four seven. The things that Snape said to him had stung a bit, but had mostly just pissed him off.

While Snape would disagree, Harry was not a complete idiot. He knew that Snape was masking his jealousy with anger. He had done this on many different occasions and it frustrated Harry to death. It was so fucking obvious just by the look in his eyes that he had wished to be the one snogging him instead of Terry. A month ago, just that would have been enough to send him running down to the dungeons, but now it just disgusted him. Snape had his chance and he had not taken it. That was two months ago and Harry was over it by now. Why should he waste his time pining over his bitter old Potions professor when he had a young cute boyfriend who loved to spend time with him? Not to mention if for some reason it had worked out between them, Sirius would have murdered Snape with his bare hands.

Harry growled in frustration, glad that nobody could hear him over the music. He then vowed to put Snape in a box inside of his mind, far, far away from the tip of his thoughts. Nothing was going to ruin his night. They all danced like crazy for the next half hour. When the final song ended, Terry, George, Fred, Seamus, Ginny, and himself all hung back in a small group, waiting on the hall to clear. There was a party taking place in the Room of Requirement in a few minutes and he knew some people were going straight there without changing out of their costumes. Seeing as more people generally came to the party's that took place on special occasions like after a dance or in the name of the new year, they figured it would look suspicious if too many people were heading that way.

He looked around to see Ron and Hermione walking in his direction. He smiled as he realized they were holding hands, told his friends that he'd be back in a minute, and was able to catch them just a few feet ahead.

"Hey, I just really wanted to congratulate you both. It's about time." He grinned and was happy to see Ron grinning back. They still might not be on good terms, but he could feel things slowly starting to improve. Hermione looked like she was caught midway in between starting to smile then remembering that she was angry with him.

"Thanks mate." Ron said. Hermione still didn't speak to him. She detached herself from Ron to talk to Parvarti who had squealed at the sight of the couple. "So what are you doing after this?" Ron asked

"Oh, you know..." He said, hinting at what he was doing without really saying it

"Are you going to a party?"

Harry thought about lying to him for a second, but decided against it. They had smoked together now so he knew that the boy would keep his mouth shut. "Yeah. In the Room of Requirement."

"Oh."

He hesitated for half a second "Want to come?"

A grin spread across Rons face and he nodded his head vigorously. He glanced over his shoulder at

Hermione. "Err, that is if I can convince her."

"Don't tell her there's going to be alcohol other than Butterbeer." Harry snickered, once again being an arse without really meaning to. "If she asks, just tell her you don't think so but you're not sure. That way, she can't really get mad."

Ron nodded in agreement and said he'd see him there. Harry went back to join his group and Ron went to wait on Hermione to finish talking. They began climbing toward Gryffindor tower. Once they got to the fifth floor, Terry split off to go to his own tower. He was supposed to be changing then meeting them back in the tower for a little pre-gaming.

Feeling disgusting, Harry headed straight to the bathroom to shower. When he came out, everybody except for Ginny and Terry were already dressed and laying across two beds they had pushed together. Fred noticed him standing clad in just a towel and boxers and wolf whistled. The others laughed and he flipped them all off, beginning to rummage through his closet.

He pulled on a pair of white skinny jeans, a white tank top, and a black vest. He laced his leather boots up, put on a thin layer of eyeliner, and fixed his hair with his magical comb. Harry had just lay down on the bed and lit a blunt when Terry finally showed up.

Harry was somewhat surprised when instead of flopping down on the bed he beckoned at him to follow him into the bathroom. Everybody else wolf whistled, but he somehow didn't think that's what his boyfriend currently had on his mind. Something felt a little off.

Terry locked and silenced the door behind him before pulling out a baggie of a white crystal looking substance and holding it up in silence.

He had seen enough at partys this summer to know what the substance was. He had no idea that people in the Wizarding world used it as well. Marijuana he could easily see because it grew wild, but meth? Harry wondered where in the world Wizards got the materials to even make it in the first place? Surely no amount of Potions ingredience could create the same thing that Muggle chemicals could.

The fact that he had never done the drug before make him nervous, but he nodded anyways. He was the kind of person that would try anything once. He hadn't been doing coke very often since school started because it tended to keep him up for days at a time and he knew his grades would begin suffering if that happened. In fact, it had been almost a month since he had done any drug other than marijuana.

He watched as Terry pulled out a piece of tin foil, a lighter, and a straw. Terry lit the underneath of the foil and inhaled through the straw. When it was Harrys turn, he had Terry light the foil for him while he inhaled the substance into his lungs, blowing it immediately back out. They returned to his bedroom and he declined a shot of vodka from Fred. Since he had never done meth before, he didn't want to do anything else in case it was a bad high. Seamus looked up in confusion at his refusal, but he could have sworn he saw the twins swap looks when he turned his back.

Thirty minutes later, he was practically bouncing as they left the tower and headed toward the Room of Requirement. The high was beginning to hit and it was absolutely wonderful. It was as if these people and this party were the only things going on in the entire world. No worries of Voldemort or Death Eaters could even come close to touching his mind. All of his problems, his frustration, his fears, none of that seemed to exist in the present moment. If only he could experience this feeling all of the time.

"Harry, are you okay?" Ginny asked him. The others were all quite a few feet ahead of them, chattering about the dance.

"I'm wonderful!" He beamed at her "I hope you are too."

"Look, I know what you were doing with Terry in the bathroom. The others do too, but they don't have the guts to say anything. I know I'm not your mother and I'm not trying to act like one, but I just want you to be careful."

Before he could respond, Terry backtracked his way over to them and grabbed his hand, pulling him forward. All Harry could do was smile at his wonderful boyfriend for the rest of the walk. When they entered the seventh floor left hand corridor, they each walked back and forth in front of the wall three times.

'I love magic' Harry thought to himself as he looked around in appreciation. They were outside in a large clearing. Trees surrounded the area on every side and he could already hear giggles coming from them as couples snuck off to get some privacy. A huge bonfire was going and people were sitting around it on different sized logs. Coolers of Butterbeer were sitting around for those who chose not to drink, and a large bucket held alcoholic beverages for those who did drink. A few others had set up smaller bonfires off to the side. The Weird Sisters was blaring from speakers hanging in mid air and thousands of stars were lighting up the sky. The temperature was a tad chilly, but nothing compared to if they were actually outside. There were more people at the party than usual due to it being Halloween, but it felt far less crowded somehow, perhaps because they were "outdoors".

Harry happily allowed himself to be led over to a smaller fire where Malfoy, Parkinson, Zabini, and Luna were all sitting. Everybody eyed him in confusion at his cheery hello.

"You're seriously cheezing the fuck out right now." Terry whispered in his ear

"So?" Harry turned around and wrapped his arms around his boyfriends neck, kissing him on both cheeks and finally the lips.

Terry did little more than roll his eyes and smirk in response. "Hey, listen. I have to go _make a deal_ real quick, if you catch my drift."

"Okay." He agreed without thought, sitting down next to Fred on a bale of hay and reaching into his pocket for his cigarettes. His hands had began twitching so badly that he was having difficulties lighting the lighter. Fred eventually took the lighter and lit it for him, studying his profile carefully as he took a long drag. "See you in a bit." He said to Terry

He was surprised to look up and find the others all staring back at him. "What?"

"Doesn't that bother you?" George asked, pointing in the direction Terry had just disappeared in.

Harry had no idea what the hell the red headed boy was talking about. His face must have shown it for Parkinson giggled loudly. "He's talking about the fact that your boyfriend's a drug dealer."

Harry had learned early into their relationship that Terry sold marijuana and also pills when he could get his hands on them. It really didn't bother him all that much as he now got all of his drugs for free and he knew that coming from a poor family, Terry had to find some way to get money.

He didn't answer for a long moment. "Well, I don't really think of it like that..." He leaned forward and began bouncing his knees up and down, attempting to find the right words. "He just...sells drugs. I mean I smoke and drink and do all of that anyways so why would it bother me?" When the others all gave him looks of exasperation, he gave up trying to explain. It was rather annoying how they felt the need to give him shit about dating a "drug dealer" when they had all bought it from him at some point.

Spotting Ron and Hermione standing awkwardly in between two bonfires, he excused himself, muttering "hypocrites" underneath his breath as he walked away.

"Hey guys! I'm glad you decided to come." He greeted them cheerily.

"Me too, mate." Said Ron and Harry smiled at the familiarality of his greeting. Hermione was silent, standing next to Ron with her arms crossed, looking around the area as if she could care less that he was there.

Sucking up his pride, he turned his attention toward the curly haired girl "Hey Hermione?"

She turned her head to look at him to show that she'd heard

"Will you please come on a walk with me?" He asked "You don't mind, do you?" Harry said to Ron. The red head assured him that he didn't mind at all and that they probably had a lot to discuss anyways. His girlfriend- Harry couldn't believe that he could now finally use that word when referring to Hermione when talking to or about Ron- threw him a filthy look, but Ron just shrugged it off and told them to have fun, which earned him another look.

They began walking down a pathway into the forest, an awkward silence issuing between them. He snuck a glance over at Hermione to find her staring straight ahead, hands stuffed deep inside of her hoodie's pockets.

He lit a cigarette with shaking fingers and took a deep drag. "Look, I'm sorry." He finally blurted out. Honest to god, if he wasn't in the state of euphoria that he was experiencing right now there was no way in a million years that he could have sucked up his pride long enough to apologize to her. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I was scared."

"Of what?"

"Of your reaction." He said "I know how Muggles and hell, even some Wizards feel about being gay. I didn't want to say anything and risk losing our friendship-" He quit speaking as a sharp blow struck him in the left shoulder, another in the right a few moments later. "Ow! What the hell?"

"You. Complete. Idiot. How could you ever think that I'd care if you liked men? I've actually suspected it since the beginning of school, but I didn't want to offend you in case you weren't gay and if you wre I wanted you to come out on your own time. Do you have any idea how upset I was that you told Ron before me? Ron!" She shook her head at him.

He spent the next few minutes apologizing profusely and assuring her that he felt bad for not telling her. By the time the clearing came back into view, a lot of Hermiones anger had diminished due to his bringing up her and Ron. She was blushing as he kept saying things like "Everybody's only been waiting for eight hundred years" and "It was about time".

He was bouncing on his heels as they walked around trying to locate their friends and boyfriends. They eventually located Ron a few minutes later. To his complete shock, the red head was sitting next to Terry and George. Zabini and Parkinson had disappeared, but Malfoy was still there, receiving odd looks from Ron and Hermione.

"It's about time you got back." Said Fred

Harry flipped him off in response and sat down next to his boyfriend who held up a cup and offered it to him. "I'm not drinking." He declined.

"It's water." Said Terry "I thought you might be thirsty."

Now that he actually took the time to think about it, he was fucking parched. He took the cup and drained the entire thing in one gulp.

The next few hours seemed to pass by in a blur. He was aware of everything he was doing, but time appeared to have flown on by. One minute he was sitting around the fire laughing, the next moment Terry was pulling him behind a tree and they were kissing like mad. They came back to smoke a blunt with everybody except for Ron and Hermione. He could have sworn it was only midnight when people began leaving in groups.

"Well what the hell kind of party is this?" He gestured toward the people who were currently exiting through the door.

"It's almost five. They're probably tired." Said Hermione, who looked exhausted herself.

"Losers! Leaving the party!" Fred, who was past the point of drunk, screamed after them.

They all decided to leave as well after that, going in small groups of three as not to attract Filch or Peeves.

Terry and himself were the last two to end up leaving and they cautiously moved through the corridors to Gryffindor tower. Technically he assumed they were about to break the rules by staying together in his dormitory, but he didn't really care. Tonight had been so perfect and now all he wanted to do was spend some time with his significant other to top it all off.

They were only half a corridor away from their destination when they heard footsteps coming toward them. Terry grabbed his arm and forced him behind a small statue. A wand light illuminated and Harry squeezed his eyes shut tight, aware that they weren't very well concealed. They were going to get caught for sure.

Snape suddenly came into view, wearing a pair of trousers and a nice shirt for some odd reason. He stumbled around the corridor, mumbling to himself. For some reason Harry found this sight to be overly amusing and let out a badly concealed giggle, earning himself a sharp jab in the rips from Terry.

It didn't take long for Harry to realize that the man was piss drunk. There was no way they were ever getting back to the tower at this rate. "I'm going to go distract him while you make a run for it." He said, having made a quick decision.

"No. You'll get in trouble." Said Terry

Harry dismissed his boyfriend's concern with a wave of his hand. "It'll be fine. I'll be back as soon as I can."

He rose, ignoring Terry's attempt to pull him back down. He positioned himself so when Snape turned to look at him Terry could run toward the tower without being seen.

"Hey Professor Snape."

Hope you guys liked this chapter! I am soooo sorry for not getting it out sooner, but I've been really busy with school and holidays. Hopefully some people are still reading!

I have been getting a lot of questions about why nobody has noticed Harry being high off of cocaine or why he never seems to act like he is on it. The paragraph I wrote in this chapter should have helped explain why that is. Please review if you read and keep your eyes open for the next chapter.

**I have researched the effects of methamphetamine on the internet and attempted to describe it's effects correctly. I have never done it before, but I have seen people smoke it and that is where my knowledge from that part of the chapter came from. If I have described anything incorrectly or if you have any knowledge for future chapters then please let me know!


	24. Chapter 24

"_Professor Snape" _

The man stopped dead in his tracks as he realized that he was not alone. Snape turned slowly in his direction and the two of them stared at one another in silence for what felt like hours, but was probably only a few seconds. Harry saw Terry slip out from his hiding place and silently begin creeping down the corridor.

"Harry?" Snape whispered in a soft tone that he did not even realize the man was capable of producing. His sudden appearance appeared to have thrown the man off as he seemed to struggle over his words for several moments. "What are you doing out this late?" He finally asked, an obvious slur to his words.

"I could ask you the same thing." He replied, feeling cockier than usual tonight. His spirits had lifted greatly over the past few hours and he was feeling like he could conquer absolutely anything at the present moment.

"I'm a teacher, Potter." Snape seemed to have checked his previous actions and had returned to his usual bastard self. "You are a student out of bed after hours. I think we may need to pay a late night visit to the headmasters office."

If it were any other occasion he probably would have been in his 'oh shit what was I thinking' state, but he didn't let the threats phase him in the slightest. "Yeah well you are the one drunkenly stumbling the hallways talking to yourself in the middle of the night." Said Harry.

Snape, whom had begun pacing back and forth while he spoke, wheeled around and opened his mouth to speak. "I am not dr-" He broke off as he stumbled over his own two feet and rammed his shoulder into the stone wall. "Fuck." Snape mumbled underneath his breath. "I think I am drunk."

"Errr, I know I may not be your favorite person now or at any time ever, but would you like me to take you back down to your room?" He offered, noticing Snape's immediate look of panic and then hesitation.

"I suppose I may allow you to escort me provided you aren't too intoxicated to lead the way." Said Snape.

Harry couldn't help but giggle at the irony of being accused of being drunk when he was actually sober.

When he recovered from his laughter, Snape was glaring at him. Before he could say anything, the older man staggered off down the corridor. He ran a few paces, catching up to the drunken man in absolutely no time.

"What in the hell do you want?" Snape snarled

"You know, I don't see why you bother putting on such an act. It doesn't take a fucking genius to realize that you far from hate my guts."

He gasped as a strong hand roughly seized him by the collar and threw him up against the hard stone wall. "And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"The older man whispered in a deathly whisper, advancing closer toward him.

"I'm not completely blind, you know. I saw your reaction the morning Terry and I walked into the Great Hall, I notice the way you glance at me when you think nobody is looking, and hell, I could practically smell the burning jealousy coming off of you when you caught us kissing earlier. You think you've got everything fooled, but you're not fooling me in the slightest."

For several long seconds, nothing could be heard other than the sound of his own heart thumping against his ribcage. Snape still had a grip on him, but he did not attempt to throw him off.

"What if- " Snape's slightly raspy voice broke through the silence "What if I told you everything you just said is completely right? What if I told you how often you really are in my thoughts? What if you knew how I feel every time I look at you? What if I told you how completely mental you make me feel at times?"

Snape-No, Severus. His name was Severus. Severus had inched forward so their was no room at all left in between them. Harry could do little to process this new information, let alone elicit a proper response to it. A surprisingly soft hand lightly touched his cheek and as he looked up, their eyes connected. He knew what was coming, but he did not have the strength to pull away now. Their lips connected and it was as if a million stars burst at once. His entire body was on fire from the top of his head to the tips of his toes and as their lips softly and slowly moved against one another, it was as if they were the only other beings left in this universe they had created for themselves.

…...

Severus could not remember the last time he had ever allowed himself to lose control like this, to throw all of his feelings out on the table without stopping to think about the consequences. He could not recall whom had started it and he didn't care. The moment their lips had connected, all of his worries were lost. Nothing else in the entire earth mattered except for this moment. This wonderful, surprising moment.

Wanting to savor this moment, he slid his arms around the boys waist, pulling him in closer in the process. As they kissed for what felt like eternity, his head spun with a combination of drunkenness and a moment of absolute happiness. He could not remember the last time he had felt this connected to another soul. In this moment, he would do anything for the young man standing in front of him. He had already risked his life to protect him for all of these years, but now it was so much more. Severus realized that he would even die for him if it came down to it. His moment of bliss ended as the boy abruptly pulled out of the kiss and backed out of his arms.

"What?" He whispered in confusion

"I-I we can't. I can't do this. I'm so sorry, Severus."

And the boy truly looked it. Severus could have sworn that there were tears in Harry's eyes as he turned away from him and walked away. He stood rooted to the spot, arms hanging at his sides, staring into the blackness Harry had just disappeared into. He slid down into the cold floor, not caring where he was. Severus was a man that had made many mistakes in his life, but this was possibly his worst next to becoming a Death Eater and contributing to his best friends sat with his face in his hands for what could have been five minutes or several hours, mind playing the previous events over and over in his head. Why in the hell had he ever had to develop feelings for the idiot boy in the first place was beyond him.

Just as he was beginning to feel slightly insane, he forced himself to get to his feet. Everything was spinning as he began stumbling back down to the dungeons. With every step he took, Severus felt sicker and sicker. He wasn't sure if it was a mental sickness or a physical sickness or both, but he just knew he could not wait to get to get to bed and fall into a deep sleep. He had long ago discovered that the more he slept, the less he had to see of reality. The longer a person slept, the less time they had to be left alone with their haunting thoughts. And then there were the nightmares of his Death Eater activities that plagued him night after night...Severus shook himself out of his own destructive thoughts as he made it off the last step and entered the hallway in which his rooms were located.

As he entered his quarters, he began cursing underneath his breath as he saw the slumped over man on his couch. After his terrible realization in Albus's office, he was in need of a strong drink or two or ten and had called Art to go out with him. It being Halloween night, the club had been absolutely packed and of course it would be his luck that he ran into that twit Logan. Ever since their kiss the night they met, he had done his best to pretend that the other man didn't exist. But after three or four drinks he was feeling lonelier than ever before and the man was right there and so obviously attracted to him, prompting his idiotic self to go over and begin conversation.

One thing had led to another and they were kissing outside in the alley again. Only this time, Severus had been drunk enough to invite the man home. It was only as they were kissing on the couch and the man had began to unbutton his pants that Harry had floated to the surface of his mind. After abruptly jumping up and leaving the room for hours, he had hoped that Logan would have had enough sense to go home. Apparently, he had not.

Severus settled for barricading himself in his room, adding all the locking and silencing charms that he knew. After changing into a pair of navy pajama bottoms and a black t-shirt, he sat down cross legged on the bed. The entire was a blur and he did not envy the hangover he would have upon waking up as he had given the last of his hangover potion to Art a few weeks ago. He maneuvered so he was laying flat on his back, staring up at the dark red ceiling. Merlin. Of all the fucking idiotic things one could do. All he had done was set himself up for another disaster. Harry was never going to want to be in a relationship with him. He snorted at the thought. Who would want to be with a sour tempered, seemingly heartless, hook nosed, greasy git like himself? Boot was much younger, much fitter, much more attractive. There was no competition.

Pissed at himself for ever initiating that first kiss, he jumped up and chucked the nearest thing in site, a glass picture frame. It shattered against the wall as he looked around for another thing to throw. He spotted a black lamp and chucked that too. Still not feeling satisfied, he continued to dismantle his bedroom for the next few minutes. Breathing heavily by the time he was done, he stood and stared at the mess he had just created. All of his wardrobe drawers had been flung open and the clothes scattered throughout the room. The lamp and all the picture frames that had been on his nightstand lay broken in the far corner of the room. His bed was now completely undone, and his left hand was bleeding where he had accidentally scratched it on something sharp during his fit.

Feeling slightly calmer, he rummaged around in the one drawer of his nightstand that he had been cautious not to throw around. not thrown everything out of; his nightstand. He eventually produced a small pack of rolling papers and some bud. It took him a couple tries to roll a joint due to the fact that he kept getting the paper half full and then dropping it on the bed. He finally flipped open his Zippo and took a hit. The moment the THC entered his brain he felt his blood pressure lowering and his heartbeat beginning to slow back down to normal. Severus settled himself back against the pillows, trying to keep his mind blank so he wouldn't think too much. After he finished smoking, he put the roach out in the ashtray on his nightstand, turned out the lights and crawled underneath the covers, but no matter how hard he tried, sleep would not come.

…...

Harry sprinted throughout the corridors, no longer thinking about getting caught. All he cared about was putting as much space as possible between himself and Severus. He ran down staircase after staircase, ignoring the burning stitch in his ribs. When he reached the great oak front doors, he burst through them and into the cool morning air. He took enormous gulps of air like he had been locked in a tight space for weeks and had lost all sense of what it felt like to breathe fresh air until now.

Light was slowly beginning to fade through the blackness of the night as he calmed himself enough to walk the pathway down to the lake. If anything would calm his nerves, it would be laying on the dock and watching the sun rise. He lay flat on his back and lit a cigarette, letting out a sound of deep frustration as he began to mentally abuse himself over what he had just allowed to happen. Why he had been so utterly stupid to kiss Severus back was beyond him. Or had he kissed him first? Harry honestly could not remember, but either way it didn't matter. He had still cheated on Terry as well as fucked himself over once again. What was it about this man that he couldn't seem to stay away from him? Harry had a million and one reasons as to why he should have nothing to do with the Potions Master, but he couldn't think of one logical reason why he felt the way he did for him.

He reached up and traced his thumb slowly over his lips, the sensation of their lips moving against each other crashing back down upon him once more. It was in this moment that he became aware of his true emotions and who he truly wanted to be able to call his own. This realization both thrilled and terrified him to no end.

…...


	25. Chapter 25

The sun had fully risen and the castle was beginning to come to life as Harry lay on his back, thinking. He knew Terry was probably freaking out that he hadn't returned yet, but he didn't quite think he could face him just a few hours after cheating on him. "I cheated on him" Harry mumbled to himself "Fuck. I cheated on him. That makes me a cheater. Fuck I hate cheaters." He had cheated on Terry with Severus-there was really no point in calling him Snape anymore now that he was in lov-"Dammit!" Harry growled out in frustration. Why did he always have to care for people who treated him like complete shite in return?

The internal battle raged on in his mind for several minutes before he finally decided that he absolutely had to get out of here. Harry picked himself up off the ground and walked back up to the castle. When he entered the Entrance Hall the smell of breakfast wafted through the air and he found himself heading to the Gryffindor table, checking to be sure Terry was nowhere in sight. He scanned the area and wasn't surprised to see Hermione sitting in her usual spot, reading the Daily Prophet. Harry was somewhat taken aback at the sight of Ron sitting next to her looking as if he were about to fall face first into his bowl of porridge.

He tried not to feel awkward as he sat down across from them in the Great Hall for the first time in months. If either of them felt the same sense of uncomfortableness as he did then they did a swell job of hiding it for Ron just issued a simple "hey" and Hermione slammed down her newspaper in front of him.

"This is horrible! Just sick! What kind of a monster could even-?" She shrieked

He picked up the paper to see what all the fuss was about. The headline read "_Over Fifty Dead and Twenty Children Captured in the Raiding of a Muggle Primary School in Yorkshire". _He felt his heart sinking as he began to read the article in full. Death Eaters had raided the elementary school with one intention; to kill. Fifty living, breathing, human beings had been robbed of their lives and twenty children were currently suffering in the hands of Lord Voldemort. Those poor children. Something needed to be done, but Harry knew that people were too frightened to actually do something helpful to try to rescue these kids. "That's horrible. Something needs to be done." Was the only think he could think to say as he passed the paper back to Hermione.

"The sad thing is that these kind of happenings are becoming so common that nobody has the energy left to do anything about it." Said Hermione

Harry knitted his eyebrows together in confusion "What do you mean that these things are becoming common?"

"Honestly, Harry, do you not read the Daily Prophet?"

"I actually haven't in months." He admitted. The last time he had so much as glanced at a newspaper was the day he had read the article about Dean Thomas's death. Since then, he had refused to look at the paper, afraid he would read where somebody else had been murdered that he cared about.

"You do realize what this means, right?" Hermione pushed

"Yeah" Rons flat voice cut in "It's just like last time. Strange happenings, unexplainable accidents, murders, kidnappings..." He trailed off with a shiver. "There's going to be a war, worse than last time, I just know it. Harry, you weren't at the house during the summer, you didn't get to overhear whispered conversations in the hallways at all hours or have Order members popping in and out five times a day to report killings and crimes and Death Eater plans that they were going to try to intercept."

Harry listened to all of this and couldn't help but wonder if they knew that Severus was their Death Eater spy. He concluded that if they did know, their attitudes toward the man would more than likely drastically change at the knowledge that their git Potions professor was the unsung hero of the light side.

The rest of their breakfast was a bit dapper after that, but he did get to watch with amusement at the way Ron and Hermione still bickered like brother and sister despite their new found relationship.

"Err, are you gonna be okay?" He had eventually asked Ron as he pushed his bowl to the side and lay his head on the table.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just really tired because somebody dragged me out of bed at the crack on dawn," The red head did an obviously exaggerated cough and said what sounded like Hermione's name. 

Hermione threw him a rather nasty look,"Perhaps you shouldn't have drank so much Firewhisky last night," She said.

"I only had a few!" Ron protested

Hermione mumbled something underneath her breath that neither of them could catch, but he could tell it was some kind of nasty remark by the look on her face.

"I'm not trying to get in your relationship, but why does it bother you so much if he had a few glasses of Firewhisky last night?" He asked"I mean, it's not like you've never drank before."

She looked absolutely flabbergasted by his comment, "I haven't- I mean that's-that's completely besides the point!"

Harry snuck a look at Ron out of the corner of his eye and they both burst out in laughter as their eyes connected, remembering a few nights from the summer before fifth year when they were all fifteen and curious.

The night in particular that stuck out to him was the one where Ron and himself had nicked a bottle of old liquor from the Weasley's old cellar and convinced Hermione to sneak to the edge of the property. They'd had a great time that night, sitting on a blanket, drinking straight from the bottle and laughing together in the warm summer night. Ron and himself had gotten a strong buzz for the very first time and Hermione had gotten drunk for the first and only time after chugging half the bottle. She'd turned out to be a very loud and energetic drunk, so loud in fact that they'd had to threaten to cast a silencing charm on her if she didn't quiet down. It had been well past three by the time they had gone back to the house and half carried Hermione up the stairs to the attic where they had set up a hang out spot in the room that the ghoul didn't occupy. It wasn't much, just two couches, a radio, a coffee table, and a few posters, but they'd spent a great deal of their time up there that summer and he had to admit to himself that he did miss it at times.

Harry became absorbed in his thoughts as he realized that he had made a huge mistake by shutting his two best friends out for these past six months. Just because he had new friends did not mean he had to forget any of his old ones. Deep down he knew the reason he hadn't had much interest in hanging out with Ron and Hermione recently was because they didn't party. When he really let himself think about it, that was pretty much all his free time consisted of besides laying around with Terry on school nights and Quiddich practice. But even Quiddich didn't hold much of his interest lately and he hated the fact that a sport that used to cause him to feel so much job no longer brought about the same feeling. There were many times this year when he had skipped practice, much to the chagrin of Katie Bell, the new Quiddich captain now that Wood and Angelina had both graduated. He had been disappointed when he had not received a captain badge along with his Hogwarts letter during the summer, but with all the trouble he had caused in the past five years he could understand why. Sometimes when he really took a step back to soak in his surroundings, Harry became aware of the fact that he wasn't really happy with the life he was living. He despised the moments when he allowed himself to become trapped within his own thoughts. It was really the only time he ever had the guts to admit just how miserable he really was. These realizations in turn gave him no form of motivation to make any changes to make the situation better. Besides, not giving a fuck was just easier.

"It's completely the point!" Ron argued back "At least nobody had to carry me up the stairs and hold my hair back while I vomited my guts out."

Hermione gave him a look that said 'Well you just fucked up big time' before snatching her newspaper from the table and walking out of the Great Hall, turning not in the direction of the marble staircase, but toward the doors leading out onto the grounds.

Now that she was gone he looked to make sure nobody was eavesdropping on their conversation before speaking. "Hey," He gained Ron's attention "Do you think you could do me a favor."

"What kind of favor are we talking about?" Asked Ron

"Look," He lowered his voice so the ginger had to lean forward to be able to hear him "I need to get out of here for a wile. Just for a couple hours."

Ron looked extremely skeptical "Err, I don't know mate. That sounds like a bad idea."

"I know, I know," Said Harry rather impatiently "It's just-you don't understand. There are things I can't talk about and I won't talk about, but the one thing I will tell you is I'm going absolutely fucking insane in this castle. There's just too much going on at once. I need to go talk to Andy." He finally admitted. Ron stared at him in silence. "Please." He added.

"Okay, I can tell somethings bothering you. I'll cover for you or whatever it is you want me to do, but if you get caught then I don't know anything about it. Before you go rushing off, can I just ask you one thing though?"

"Sure."

"How come you can't talk to me about whatever it is that's bothering you? What, is it you and Terry? Oh dear Merlin you don't think I'm homophobic do you? Because you know Charlie's gay and Remus is gay and Padfoot is and Seamus is too. Do you ever see me treating any of them differently? No because it doesn't matter to me. Some guys it does, but they're just ignorant. I know we may haven't exactly been on the best of terms for the past few months, you're my best mate and you can always talk to me. I know we usually don't have conversations about our feelings and stuff like a pair of gossiping girls, but I just wanted to let you know that mum considers you to be another son so that practically makes you my brother now. If you don't want to tell me what it is that's fine. I just wanted to let you know that."

Harry didn't know what to say at first. He now officially felt terrible for the way he had shut his best mate out because all he cared about was partying. If he wasn't careful, he was going to wake up one day and have no one, a thought that absolutely terrified him. In that moment, he resolved to make a point to hang out with Ron and Hermione more often. Ron was now looking down into his cup of coffee, waiting for his response.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry," He finally said " I am sorry for shutting you guys out. I'm sorry for punching you. I'm sorry for the things I've said to you recently and the general attitude I just have. I'm beginning to realize that I need to make some changes in my life, for the better."

"Good," Said Ron "I'm honestly really glad to finally hear that. We've all been worried about you lately. It just seems like you're starting to go down a path you don't want to go down. That's all I'm saying."

"Yeah, well things are going to change. But anyways what I was wanting you to do was get my stuff out of the dormitory for me."

Ron looked relieved "Oh that's it?"

"Yes that's it. What did you think I was going to have you cause a diversion in the common room so I can use the fire or some shit?"

"Well, I didn't know!" Ron said. "What do you need me to get?"

"A change of clothes, my comb, map, and my dads cloak," Harry recited "Oh and I also need the key out of my nightstand. Do you got all that?"

"Yeah, I got it. I'll go now and get a head start. Wait a few minutes then walk up the stairs really slow. Hopefully I'll be done by the time you get to the portrait hole." The red head collected the package his mother had just sent him, hand knitted socks and two sets of used robes since he was outgrowing all of his clothes, and walked away.

"Make sure the outfit matches!" He yelled after him and Ron dismissed him with a wave of a hand.

He waited ten minutes before he decided it was safe to probably start walking. He passed very few students on the stairs. It appeared that after the dance last night, nobody was too keen to get up at seven in the morning to eat breakfast. The Gryffindor table had been nearly empty aside from about a dozen first and second years, a seventh year named Angelica and her Hufflepuff boyfriend whom had both been at the bonfire last night, and a small group of acne ridden fourth years who were all doing homework over breakfast even though it was a Saturday.

Harry had also taken careful notice that Severus had not been present at breakfast. It was not like he had been expecting him to show up anyways, what with his being piss drunk only a few hours before. He at least hoped that the man was okay and hadn't drowned to death in a pile of his own vomit or something equally horrifying.

When he reached the seventh floor, there was no sign of Ron anywhere so he waited outside, ignoring the Fat Lady and her other portrait friend whom were both loudly snoring in the frame, obviously having had a little too much fun the night before as well. The portrait swung open a few minutes later and Ron came out, carrying his bag in one hand and the cloak and map in the other hand.

"Sorry it took so long. I had to be really quiet because everybody else is still sleeping."

"It's alright. Did you get everything?" Harry asked, swinging his bag over his shoulders.

"I think so." Said Ron

Harry checked the map to make sure no teachers were roaming the corridors, but they all appeared to either be sleeping or at breakfast. "Thanks for this. Hey, if Terry wakes up before I get back do you think you could-"

"Tell him you're in detention with Snape and that's why you didn't come into the dorm last night?" Ron finished

Harry smiled, a bit at the fact that Ron was covering for him again like all times, and a bit at the irony of his 'detention with Snape' lie. "Thanks for all this. I'll be back in a few hours."

He was halfway down the corridor when his friend called out to him "Hey Harry?"

Harry stopped and turned around "Yeah?"

"Err-be careful."

"I will." Said Harry before setting off walking again. When he reached the next corridor he looked around to make sure he was alone before putting his invisibility cloak on and beginning the short walk to the Room of Requirement.

…...

Next chapter: Harry talks with Andy, Ron and Hermione make it official, & Severus and Harry discuss last night.

Thank you all for reading! Please review!


	26. Chapter 26

Harry cautiously walked the streets of Little Whingington, looking down every few feet to make sure his cloak was covering him entirely. The last think he needed was for a Muggle to spot a floating ankle. He also knew that what he was doing was dangerous in a more serious manner. Although it seemed easy to forget at times, the reality was that Voldemort and his followers were still after him. They had been lying low ever since the night in the graveyard during his fourth year, but that was apparently no longer the case what with all the disasters that had been occurring lately. Of course, The Daily Prophet was still denying that Voldemort had returned and printing stories calling him a liar every other issue. He wondered how many more deaths and disappearances would have to take place before Fudge would stop living in denial that the darkest wizard of all time had returned after thirteen years of silence. While it may not happen anytime soon, Harry knew that a war was coming and that his life was in danger more than ever before. He wasn't going to take any chances if he could help it.

The walk to Andy's house seemed to take longer than usual, and he couldn't help the genuine smile that spread across his face as the familiar little white house came into view. Figuring everybody would still be sleeping, Harry dug the house key he had yet to have the chance to use out of the front pocket of his jeans and turned it in the lock. He pushed the door open and stood still for a long moment, taking in his surroundings. Not much had changed since he had last seen the place; the kitchen counter was lined with empty liquor bottles and half full red plastic cups, rap music was faintly playing from a speaker somewhere in the house, and in the living room, he could see where people were laying passed out on the furniture. He was home.

It appeared that nobody was awake yet, but he hadn't expected any less what with it being the morning after Halloween and all. 'They were probably out at the club last night' Harry realized with jealousy. He silently shut the door behind him and tip-toed through the house. He'd already noticed Matt and some girl he didn't know sleeping on each of the couches when he'd came in, but now as he walked past the living room he saw Faith and Heather asleep next to each other on a mattress lying on the floor. Chad's door was closed, but he glanced in Megan's bedroom as he passed by. She was fast asleep and he laughed to himself at the sounds of her loud snores.

When he pushed Andy's bedroom door open, he was surprised to see him awake and sitting up in bed. The older boy froze upon seeing him before letting out yelp. "Harry!"

Before he even had time to react, Andy jumped over the bed and flung his arms around him. He hugged him back happily, despite the fact that his ribs were currently being crushed. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" He asked, finally releasing him.

"I didn't even know I was coming," Said Harry, turning away and flopping down on the end of the bed. Andy sat down across from him in silence. "It's just...I needed somebody to talk to."

"What's wrong? What's been going on?"

On the walk over, Harry had pondered over just how much he should tell Andy. He had never told a soul about himself and Severus for the fear of what would happen if he did. In the Muggle world, it was generally looked down upon for a thirty six year old teacher to be messing around with a sixteen year old student, so he assumed the feelings about the situation were quite the same in the Wizarding World. The entire situation in itself was just a bad one, come to think of it.

"Alright. I'm going to tell you this story, but bear with me because it's going to take forever."

Andy leaned over and pulled the box he kept his weed stuff in, pulling out what he needed to roll a blunt. "Well, go on then." He said, making a sweeping motion with his hand.

"Okay. Well, after I left at the end of the summer I ended up spending a few weeks at my godfather's house. A teacher from my school was staying there with us and well we kind of have a history of hating each others guts, but that's a story for another time. Anyway, we ended up smoking together a few times and we started to get along rather well for a little bit. I had to go stay with him at his house for the last two weeks of the summer and one night we were on his roof smoking and well, we ended up kissing." Harry stopped talking as the memory of that night replayed itself over in his head. He wondered how much trouble could have been avoided if he hadn't lay beside Severus on that sofa, if he would have pushed him away before their lips could touch.

"Wait, so you hooked up with your teacher? Isn't that like, totally illegal?" Andy asked, beginning to run the flame of his lighter along the blunt he had just finished rolling.

Harry was surprised at how cool he was about the situation. "Yeah, probably. " He said

"Wow, so what happened after that?"

"Well, he ended up pulling away and going back into the house. I stayed on the roof until the next morning and then shut myself in my room for the next few days," He paused to hit the blunt Andy had just passed to him. "So yeah, he basically pretended like nothing ever happened for the rest of the time I stayed there, but then we ended up smoking together the night before school started. We kissed again and I ended up pulling away. We went back to school the next day and ended up having a talk before agreeing to be friends. We were doing just fine with just being friends for a wile, but one night when I went down to his chambers- Oh, I don't think I've ever mentioned this in my letters or anything, but Hogwarts is actually a huge castle- Anyways, to cut it short we fell asleep together on his couch that night." He grew silent at this point, shaking his head and digging around in his pockets for his cigarettes. That had been the morning that he had finally realized that they were never going to be together and he should stop getting his hopes up because they were just going to get crushed again. Since that day, he had done everything in his power to stay away from Severus.

"Harry?" Andy pulled him out of his thoughts and he took a moment to mentally shake himself. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Harry nodded in response, motioning at his friend to pass him the blunt. He only got a few hits before it was so small that he could no longer hold it, so they put it in Andy's bowl. He took deep hits, wanting to make sure he got super baked. Surely enough, he soon found the madness of the past twelve hours slowly melting away as a full body high crept upon him, leaving him feeling pleasantly calm and content. "Alright, so where was I?" He finally asked, leaning back against the pillows and lighting a cigarette.

"Uh, the last thing I remember is you saying that you and that teacher guy fell asleep on his couch."

"Oh. Right," Said Harry "Well the next morning I woke up and I don't know I just realized..." He took a drag off of his cigarette to buy him a moment to try to piece his feelings into words "Well, I guess I realized that nothing was ever going to turn out like I wanted it to. I know it sounds crazy because we'd just hated each other like a couple of months ago, but I really developed feelings for him in that short time. By the way he was acting that morning, I could tell that nothing was going to change despite the events of the night before. I left his rooms that day and we quit talking for good. I started going to all these crazy party's in this hidden room in the castle and we went back to hating one another." He finished.

"Wow. I can't believe you actually messed around with your teacher! That's something that only happens in the movies!" Andy said with a little too much excitement at this realization. "Soo...tell me about this guy. What's he teach? Oooh, is he married and in the closet?"

"No!" Harry laughed "He's in his thirties. He isn't married, never has been. I'm not exactly sure if he's in the closet or not, but obviously nobody could know about us. He's a Potion's teacher, which is a subject sort of similar to Chemistry. He has a reputation for being this completely cold hearted git and he almost always has his guard up, but every once in a wile you get to see a side of Severus that makes you realize that there is much more depth than the surface lets on. He has this way of making you want to slap the shit out of him, then immediately pin him down and snog him senseless..." He trailed off as he realized that he should probably stop talking about Severus now. "Uh, well, anyways, I sort of have a boyfriend now.

"Oh my god," Andy exclaimed, giving him a swift slap on the shoulder" How in _the hell _could you wait until now to bring something like this up? Especially with it being your first boyfriend and everything!"

"Well, err, that's sort of why I'm here," He said "I...sort of...cheated on him...last night."

Andy looked even more surprised at hearing this newest development than he had upon finding out that he was seeing someone."With who?" He asked, but then appeared to quickly but the pieces together "Oh god, with that teacher?"

Harry nodded "Yeah. There was a Halloween dance at my school last night and then most of the upperclassmen went to this party. Afterward, Terry and I got delayed sneaking back to my dorm because Severus was drunkenly pacing the hallway right by where we were hiding. I stepped out to distract him while Terry ran, and well it's a long story, but..." He pulled down the front of his hooded sweatshirt to reveal several purple, swollen hickeys on his neck and collarbone. When he got back to school, the first thing he was going to do was look for a way to get them removed before Terry saw and shit hit the fan.

"So...what are you going to do about it?"

"I have no fucking clue," He honestly admitted "I feel like total shite for cheating on Terry, but...as crazy as it sounds, things just feel so...right with Severus. I ended up pulling away from the kiss and laying outside by the lake for hours. I-I realized sometime early this morning that I'm in love with him. Oh and also that I'm completely and utterly screwed, but yeah mostly that. It's just...I don't want to hurt Terry. He's been an amazing boyfriend and I truly do have feelings for him. I guess I don't know what I want at this point."

There was a momentary lapse of silence between the two. "Well, I'm going to give you my honest opinion. I'm sorry if I say anything to offend you, but if I didn't care about you I wouldn't give you the truth."

Harry nodded. He knew that Andy truly did have his best interests at heart.

"I think that you and this Severus guy seem to have something between you two. I mean, I know I've never seen you two together or anything, but you just, you get this look in your eyes when you're talking about him. I've never seen you feel this way about someone before and it's actually kind of nice. I'm not telling you what to do, because in the end you're going to do what you want to do, but I think if you chose to stay with Terry that you owe it to him to be honest. Look, I just want to see you happy and right now you don't seem very happy. I hope you figure things out."

Harry knew that he was right. He did owe it to Terry to tell him the truth about what had happened last night, but he was scared. What if he went straight to Dumbledore or somebody of authority and Severus got into trouble? He just couldn't risk that happening. No matter what, he knew that he had a decision to make. Or did he? Who knows if Severus even felt the same for him or if he had just been drunk and fucking with his emotions like usual.

Deciding he would worry about it later, he thanked Andy for the advice and for letting him vent to him. They hung around in his room for a couple hours until the others finally started to wake up. Megan stumbled past the room on her way to the kitchen around noon, doing a double take at the sight of him sitting on the end of the bed.

"Oh my god, what are you doing here!" She exclaimed in excitement, coming over to give him a hug.

"I'm visiting home for the weekend, but I have to leave tonight to catch the train back to school. Thought I'd stop by since I haven't seen you guys in forever." He lied

"Damn, what's with all the noise in here," A voice said from the doorway. He looked around to see that Chad had finally woken up. "Harry? What are you doing here?" He said in confusion.

Harry gave him the same line he had just given Megan and the four of them spent the next few hours catching up. Hearing stories of all the fun he had been missing lately made him never want to go back to Hogwarts. What if he didn't come back? Just hid out here for the time being? But no, he knew that shit would really hit the fan if he pulled a stunt like that. He just wished he would have asked Ron to at least cover for him until tomorrow morning so he could relive his summer for a night.

Everybody in the house finally dragged themselves out of bed around four that afternoon. He met Matt's new girlfriend, Ashley, and was attacked by Faith and Heather the moment they spotted him. The group had decided to have a chill day in the wake of them all being out so late the night before, so they all sat around listening to music and having a major smoke session. Harry allowed himself to lose track of time in the wake of being reunited with all of his friends. He glanced out the window as it was beginning to grow dark. Realizing that Ron was probably freaking out by now, he leaned over and whispered to Andy that he should probably be leaving soon. The older boy immediately offered to drive him to wherever he needed to go.

He found an aching developing in his chest as he stood to give out his goodbyes to everybody, wishing that he didn't have to leave so soon. He promised that he would try his hardest to return for the holidays and Hannah made him pinky promise that he would at least be here for New Years.

Andy and himself walked to his car and Harry got into the passengers seat. As they pulled out of the driveway, he turned around in his seat, getting in one last look at the place he considered his home.

"Where am I taking you?" Andy asked, coming to the intersection.

"You can just drop me off at the end of Privet Drive." He answered

"Do I even want to know how it is your going to get back to Scotland?"

"Probably not." Harry grinned, picturing the look on Andy's face at seeing him jump into the floo and being whisked thousands of miles away in mere seconds. They drove the short drive in silence, and Harry knew that they were both trying to put off saying goodbye for as long as possible.

When they reached Private Drive, instead of just letting him jump out like usual, Andy pulled the car alongside the curb and shut the ignition off. "I wish you didn't have to leave so soon." He said

"Yeah. I know. It sucks." Harry said, unable to think of any other words to describe how he felt about having to leave so soon. "I'll be back for Christmas though." He added

"You better be. I've seriously been going insane over here without having you to talk to. I mean, the others are great, but...well they aren't you. Let's just leave it at that"

"I know what you mean." Said Harry "I have plenty of friends back at school, but there are just certain things I can't talk to them about because I feel like they'll judge me. You're probably the one person I can tell anything to."

Andy pulled him into a long hug and Harry returned it. "Promise you'll start writing more?" Andy said

"I promise." Harry glanced out the window at the setting sun. "Well, guess I better get going." He leaned over and gave Andy another quick hug before opening up the car door and beginning to walk down the street. He heard the little red car start and pull away from the curb, but he kept going, knowing if he turned around he would be tempted to delay his return to Hogwarts even more.

As he passed the Dursley's house, he looked up, surprised to see that all of the lights were on even though there was no car in the driveway. He hadn't spoken to his aunt or his uncle since he had returned to school, but that was no surprise. Harry had gotten up the slightest bit of hope that Dudley would write to him, what with their new found friendship and all, but first term was nearly over and he had yet to receive a letter. Oh well, it's not like he was going to let it bother him. He had spent way too many years wishing for his family to give a damn about him and the older he got, the more he realized that the family you chose isn't always the family that you were born into.

Harry finally reached the end of Privet Drive, cursing underneath his breath as he realized that Ms. Figg's car was back in her driveway, and it hadn't been when he had came through her floo earlier. He pulled his invisibility cloak out of his pocket and slipped it over himself before coming to look through her sitting room window. She was fast asleep in her ancient armchair with three of her cats spread across her lap. Deciding that he was just going to have to chance it, he slowly turned the handle of the door. He held his breath as he tiptoed through the sitting room and into the kitchen where her fireplace was located. He scooped up a handful of powder and tossed it into the fireplace. Green flames shot up and he stepped into them, shouting"Hogwarts, Room of Requirement!"


	27. Chapter 27

When Harry still hadn't returned by late in the afternoon, Ron found himself beginning to grow worried. He had said he would only be gone for a couple hours, but he had been gone for close to seven. What if something had happened to him? What if he had gotten himself into trouble in some way? Or Merlin forbid, what if he had ran into You Know Who or his followers? If anything were to happen to Harry, he would have himself to blame for it. He had known that helping him sneak out of the castle was a bad idea, but Harry had seemed desperate to get the hell out of here. Ron really wanted to know what had his friend so upset, but as they had just rekindled their friendship less than twenty four hours ago, he figured that he shouldn't try too hard to stick his nose in Harry's business for the time being. He wouldn't want to risk losing his best mate again.

Ron sighed as he heaved himself out of the armchair he had been occupying beside the fire all afternoon. Hermione had disappeared into her dormitory by the time he had returned from breakfast and he hadn't seen her all afternoon. Despite what everybody already seemed to assume, they had never exactly made it official between them. Secretly, he was afraid that she didn't feel the same way about him that he felt for her. Yes, she had kissed him back last night, but what if that was only because she wanted to spare his feelings and save him from being embarrassed in front of a crowd of people? They needed to talk and he figured no time would be better than the present.

He looked around the room to see if any fellow sixth years or girls in general were near the staircase as the castle's ancient rules still prevented him from entering the girls dormitories. Ron spotted Ginny halfway up the stairs and called out to her. "What?!" She wheeled around with an obvious annoyance at his addressing her.

Ron held his hands up "Whoa, calm down will you? I was only wondering if you could go get Hermione for me. Tell her it's important." He said

"Ooooh", Said Ginny "I nearly forgot that you two were snogging on the dance floor last night. I'll go get her for you." She said, heading up to the sixth year dorms with a look on her face that Ron recognized to mean she was 'getting the gossip' or whatever in girl language.

He waited at the bottom of the stairs for a good ten minutes before Hermione finally descended the staircase. He had to conceal a smile at the sight of her. It didn't matter if she was all dressed up as she had been last night or if she was wearing a pair of jeans with a sweatshirt as she was now. She was absolutely beautiful to him and he had wanted to be with her for as long as he could now remember.

"Hey." She said, coming to stand in front of them

"Hey." He said back "Wanna go up to my dorm and talk?"

Surprisingly, she agreed. They ignored the stares they were getting from everybody who had been near them at the dance and at the party last night and climbed the stairs to the boys dormitories. He gestured at her to sit on the bed and he sat down next to her.

Taking a deep breath, he decided to get it all out there as soon as possible before he chickened out. "Okay, so what I really want to talk about is last night." He said, hoping she would take over from there. When she just looked at him as if to say 'well, go on then', he took another deep breath before beginning to speak. "I just want you to know that it was probably the best night I've ever had. I've wanted to be with you for a long time, but I was always too afraid to let you know. When I heard about the Halloween dance, I decided that now was the time if anytime to do something about the way I feel for you. That's when I came up with the whole Romeo and Juliet idea. I just wanted to make the night perfect for you."

He finished speaking and nervously turned his head to look at her, unsure of what to say next. He ended up not having to say anything for the next thing he knew she had leaned over and kissed him on the mouth. He slid his arm around her next and deepened the kiss. He had waited so long for these moments and he wanted each one to be perfect. When they finally broke apart, they were both smiling.

"So, does this mean we're official?" Ron asked her.

"If you want us to be." She said

"Of course." Was all he replied, not wanting to ruin the moment by saying something stupid. Hermione stifled a yawn next to him, making him aware of how tired he was as he had hardly gotten any sleep that morning.

Ron moved away and settled back against the pillows, hoping that Hermione would lay next to him. He wanted to sleep with her so bad. He had for a long time now. And not in a sexual way, either. Just the two of them lying close together, her head on his chest and his arm around her back, drifting off into a peaceful sleep, every little problem just fading away until there was nothing left but the two of them.

She lay down next to him a moment later, and he slowly wrapped his arm around her. When he looked down, her eyes were closed and she appeared to be falling asleep. He closed his eyes with a smile forming across his lips.

…...

When Harry finally entered the common room around dinnertime, he was glad to see that it was nearly empty. He had no idea if anybody had noticed that he had never returned to the tower after the bonfire, but he wasn't in the mood to explain himself to anybody. Now that he was back, he had realized that he had a lot of thinking to do and some decisions to make.

He entered the dormitory and was relieved to see that all of his dorm mates were down at dinner. He sat down on his freshly made bed, probably the work of Dobby, and rubbed his eyes tiredly. His high had completely worn off by now and lack of sleep along with all of the weed he'd smoked today was beginning to catch up with him. He knew if he fell asleep now his sleeping pattern would be thrown off track, so he settled for splashing some cool water on his face in the bathroom. On his way out, he glanced over at Ron's bed with a start as he realized that it was occupied. Harry smiled as he noticed Hermione laying on Ron's chest, both of them fast asleep. It appeared they had finally made it official. About time.

Harry made sure to be extra quiet as he crossed over to his side of the room and undressed. Not planning on leaving the tower anytime soon, he pulled on a maroon sweatshirt and changed into a pair of black sweatpants. He drew the hangings around his bed and leaned back against the pillows, replaying the events of the past two days over again inside of his head.

…...

When his alarm went off on Monday morning, instead of jumping up right away, Harry groaned and pulled the blanket back over his head. He had tossed and turned for the majority of the night, unable to escape from his own thoughts long enough to fall into a peaceful sleep. Going down to breakfast would just mean having to face both Severus and Terry, something he wasn't prepared to do yet, but knew he had to do eventually.

Grumbling to himself, he finally forced himself to sit up and push back the hangings. Harry stumbled past Ron who was lacing up his trainers and into the bathroom to wash his face. He glanced into the mirror and noted that there were evident bags underneath his eyes from lack of sleep. His skin looked pale and disgusting. Already hating this day, he brushed his teeth before going back into the dorm to get dressed.

"Well, you look bright eyed and bushy tailed this morning." Ron said as he passed him

Harry raised his arm in the air and flipped him off in response.

The red headed boy laughed before turning serious "But seriously though, are you okay? You look pissed about something."

He finished slipping his robes over his head and began pulling his shoes on. "It's just..." He began, but then changed his mind "Nah, never mind. Everything's fine." He said, beginning to apply foundation to his face in an attempt to make the bags underneath his eyes less noticeable. "Hey, have you got the time?" He asked in an attempt to change the subject.

Ron gave him a look that told him he knew that he was trying to change the subject before looking down and checking his watch. "It's 7:15" He said. "Better get going if we want breakfast."

"You go ahead." Said Harry "I'm not really hungry."

"Are you sure?" Ron asked "I can stay up here with you if you want."

Harry dismissed him with a wave of his hand "Go ahead. I'm sure Hermione's waiting for you."

As soon as Ron shut the door behind him, he pointed his wand at the door and locked it. He had no desire to be around other people today. He had almost decided not to get up and play sick all day, but that wouldn't bring him any closer to solving any of his problems and he knew it. Sometime in the midst of tossing and turning in bed all night, Harry had concluded that it was time to finally face this Severus-Terry love situation head on. The longer he chose to do nothing, the less likely things were to change. He knew he needed to make a decision soon.

He sat down on the bed and lit a cigarette"Dobby!"

As predicted, the little elf appeared by his side in an instant. "Did Mr. Harry Potter sirs call for Dobby?!" He asked in excitement

"Do you think you could please bring me some breakfast, Dobby? I don't much fancy going down to the Great Hall this morning." He asked

"I can be helping you with that sirs!" The elf beamed brightly "What does Harry Potter be wanting for his breakfast?"

"Just a cup of coffee is fine."

The elf disappeared with a loud crack and returned a moment later with a tray laden with coffee, sugar, creamer, toast, bacon, and eggs. "If youz be needing anything else just call on Dobby sir!" The little elf bowed deeply before disappearing again.

Harry just stared at the food in front of him, taking a long drag of his cigarette. He knew he should really get something into his stomach as it had been over twenty four hours since he'd last eaten a meal, but he didn't think he could force himself to eat. Stamping his cigarette butt out in the ashtray, he pulled a joint he had rolled a few days ago out of his nightstand and lit it. It had been a long time since he'd been able to wake and bake.

A loud thunk made him jump about a foot in the air. He looked around for it's source and was relieved to see Hedwig perched on the windowsill with his mail in between her beak. He walked over and pushed open the window. She flew in and landed on his four poster bed, hooting softly.

He took a few more puffs off of his joint, hoping it would make the day he had ahead of him somewhat easier to cope with. Rifling through his mail, he tossed aside the Daily Prophet along with some other junk mail, smiling as he came to a letter with familiar handwriting on it.

"_Dear Harry,_

_ How are you doing? I'm sorry that I haven't written in a wile, but Mooney and I have been incredibly busy redecorating. We can't wait for you to see everything. Are you keeping up with your classes? I know I don't stress it enough to you, but now that you're in your sixth year, it really is important that you work hard. Especially with N.E.W.T.S. coming up next year. I hope your lessons are going well. They are absolutely essential, remember that if you ever find yourself getting frustrated with the slimy git. Anyway, on a much lighter note, the actual reason I am writing to you is to inquire about your plans for the holiday's. We would love for you to spend it here and of course all of the Weasley's and whomever else you want would be invited as well. Send word with your next letter so I can let Dumbledore know._

_ Love, _

_ Padfoot _

Harry finished reading the letter and set it aside, letting out a sigh. He wanted to spend Christmas with Sirius and everybody else, he really did, but he also wanted to be with Andy and the rest of the gang to at least celebrate the new year. He knew it would hurt Sirius's feelings if he didn't come and that was the last thing he wanted to do. Maybe he could work something out where he could go to Privet Drive for the last week of break or something.

He fed Hedwig a piece of bacon and she nuzzled his hand in thanks before taking off in flight. Harry checked his watch, cursing underneath his breath as he realized that he had Herbology in fifteen minutes and was all the way up in the tower still. He flung his bag with his schoolbooks over his shoulder, made a quick bacon, egg, and toast sandwich to take with him to class, and set off at a fast pace.

Just before entering the green house he stopped to quickly spray himself to cover up the smell of weed, hoping his eyes weren't too red. He arrived right as the bell rang to signal the start of their lesson.

"Where have you been?" Hermione asked him the moment he joined her and Ron in collecting pods from a particularly ill tempered plant.

"Lost track of time." Harry said, flopping down on the bench behind them while Ron and Hermione worked together to open up one of the pods. He pulled his sandwich out of his bag and began wolfing it down, suddenly starving.

Professor Sprout was making her way over toward their group now. In order to make it look like he was actually doing something, he motioned at Ron to throw him a freshly opened pod that they were supposed to be collecting the pus out of.

"Terry was looking for you this morning." Hermione said after their professor moved past them to help Seamus, whose pod had just exploded in his face.

"Oh."

"_Oh_?" She repeated questioningly

Harry just shrugged, hoping she would just drop it. He knew that his friends truly only had his best interests at heart, but even if he wanted to he knew he could never tell them about himself and Severus. Ron had gone absolutely mental at the beginning of the year when he had said they were kind of friends. Harry could just imagine what his reaction would be if he ever found out he had been snogging their Potions professor. He stayed silent for the rest of the class period, pretending to be focused on his work. They had Transfiguration next in which they were working on transforming a desk into a pig. After that was History of Magic, in which he slept the entire class period while old Professor Binns rambled on about goblins in the 12th century.

By the time lunch finally rolled around, his friends were giving him strange looks and he knew it was because he had been so silent all day, but if they knew the thoughts that were running through his head then they would know that he could hardly think straight, let alone carry on a normal every day conversation with the two of them. He was just beginning to eat his salad when Terry plopped himself down next to him.

"Oh my god, there you are." Said Terry "Where have you been these past few days?"

His friends seemed to take this as their cue to leave and they hurried away with Hermione rambling on about the library.

"I'm really sorry. Snape went mental on me the other night and made me clean cauldrons in the dungeons until like seven in the morning. Then he took me to the headmaster who contacted my godfather and well basically I'm in a shit load of trouble right now." He said, hating himself for lying straight to Terry's face.

"Wow. I'm so sorry that I left you there by yourself. I should have taken the blame with you."

"No. I wouldn't have wanted you to do that. So what if I had to scrub cauldrons for a few hours and get told off by a couple of people. No harm was done so just don't worry about it anymore." He said, wishing to drop the subject as soon as possible. Out of habit he found his gaze lingering over the staff table where Severus was currently seated. He was ignoring Flitwick's attempts at making conversation with him and scowling down at his plate.

Terry rambled on to him about the party the other night for the rest of the hour. Harry said little, nodding his head back and forth now and then. When the bell rang to signal that lunch was over, he stood up and grabbed his bag. "See you at dinner." He said, walking away before Terry even had time to respond or try to kiss him.

He had a double free period and then his Defense lesson after lunch. Harry was dreading having to be within Severus' presence for an hour and a half, especially after noting that he didn't appear to be in a particularly good mood today. He spent the better part of his free period wandering about the grounds. Before he made his way back to this castle, he found a secluded spot on the edge of the forest and smoked a blunt to calm his nerves, causing him to turn up for defense ten minutes late.

The entire class turned their heads to look at him as he entered the room and slid into an empty seat that happened to be directly in front of Severus' desk. Harry kept his eyes trained on the floor, refusing to look up at the man in front of him, waiting for whatever punishment he was about to receive.

To his surprise, Severus merely cleared his throat before beginning to address the class, ignoring his tardiness completely "Today you will continue attempting to non verbally disarm one another. I shall be paring you up momentarily," He began speaking in his usual drawn out, hollow tone "Before we get started, it would do you all well to note that I will be giving a practical exam over the non verbal work we have done this semester right before Christmas. Therefore, I strongly advise that you continue your practice outside of this class room as some of us are still...lacking in ability." He said, seemingly glaring straight at Neville as he spoke.

They were all divided up into pairs after that and Harry found himself working with Malfoy for the first time this school year. "Don't worry, I swear I'll go easy on you."

"We'll see, Potter." Malfoy shot back, their long standing rivalry beginning to come out.

Casting non verbal spells required much more work and concentration than simply repeating a few words over in your head. It was all about the amount of energy you channeled as you moved your wand in precisely required movement. Harry had been having trouble with the spells all term. Fifteen minutes later, he still hadn't managed to non verbally disarm his opponent. Just as he was giving up and they were about to switch positions, Harry felt a presence behind him. He knew without turning around that it was Severus.

"You're doing it wrong." Severus said, placing his hand on top of his in order to guide him in the correct wand movement. He was supposed to be concentrating on the spell, but the warmth of Severus' hand against his was throwing him off. "Concentrate, Potter."

This time he threw all of his energy into disarming his opponent and was surprised when Malfoy's wand went flying across the room. Malfoy looked surprised too and Harry couldn't help but laugh as the boy slowly looked down at his empty hand, around the room, at Harry, then back down to his hand again. As the blonde boy went to retrieve his wand, he felt Severus' hand leave his wrist. By the time he turned around, Severus was already walking away to instruct one of his Slytherins.

"Psst, Potter. Are you going to continue oogling him until the bell rings or are you gonna let me have a go."

"Huh? What?" Harry turned back toward Malfoy, realizing that he had probably been watching their professor walk away for just a little too long "Oh no, I wasn't...I was just...Let's get back to work."

Malfoy gave him a look that plainly said 'You're full of shit', but didn't say another word about the subject. Merlin, he couldn't believe that he'd let himself be so obvious without even realizing what he was doing. With Malfoy, his main concern actually wasn't him running his mouth about the school if his suspicions rose about the two of them. Malfoy's father was a member of Voldemort's inner circle, as was Severus. All it would take was one tiny comment from Malfoy to his father and Severus' life would be on the line.

The bell ringing pulled him out of his thoughts. Harry grabbed his bag and made a beeline for the classroom door, needing to get the hell away from everything and everybody. He hadn't even made it to dinnertime yet, but he was already five hundred percent done with this day. All he could think about was his fucked up love situation and how no matter what he did, somebody was going to end up hurt. Harry wish he hadn't put himself in this position. He could try to place the blame on outside forces, but he knew that in the end everything came back to him. Every time he finally found himself at a good place in life, he did something to fuck it up.

When dinnertime rolled around, Harry still had no desire to return to the castle. It had grown darker and colder as he sat by the lake all afternoon and he was now shivering in only a thin jacket. Aside from being cold, he was also incredibly sleepy, and a little hungry. He had also promised Terry that he'd see him tonight, so he figured that he was probably wondering why he hadn't turned up to dinner by now.

A branch cracking somewhere behind him caused him to jump about a mile. He jumped to his feet and wheeled around, fearing that he had been caught as students weren't allowed out on the grounds after dark. He almost wished he had been caught by Filch or even Dumbledore as his eyes adjusted to the darkness enough to see that it was Severus.

"What are you doing out here?" Severus asked

"I could ask you the same." Harry said

He could see Severus raising an eyebrow even through the darkness "I fancied a walk. I've found that it's a nice way to clear one's mind."

"Yeah..." Said Harry uncomfortably "Well, I was just going in so-" He made at attempt to go around him and back up to the castle, but Severus held a hand out in front of his chest.

"Harry, we need to talk."

"Yeah, we do."

Severus kept glancing up toward the castle as they spoke and Harry knew it was because he was paranoid that somebody might be glancing out of one of the hundreds of windows. He gestured to an empty pathway that would lead them through the very edge of the woods and they set off walking. He lit a cigarette to have something to do with his hands.

"So...how have you been?" Harry asked in an attempt to make small talk

"I've been alright. And yourself?"

"I've been better." He said, careful to avoid Severus' gaze.

After about fifteen minutes they came to a semi hidden spot that looked out over the water. Harry felt his heart rate increasing as they both stopped walking and turned toward each other.

"Did you mean what you said the other night?" Harry finally broke the silence that had gathered between them, asking the question that had been ever present in his mind for the past few days.

"I meant every word." Severus said in a voice barely above a whisper.

Harry lifted his head up and looked straight into the other mans eyes for the first time in months. They were full of a vulnerability that he had never seen in him before. His body suddenly seemed to move on it's own accord, taking one step closer to Severus, then another. Severus' fingertips lightly touched his waist and without further thought, Harry closed the gap in between them. Their lips brushed together and he could feel the passion building by the second. After what felt like eternity, their lips finally connected. The other man's touch sent a fire running throughout his body unlike anything he had ever felt before. At some point during the kiss, he felt Severus begin running his fingertips through the tips of his hair. Unable to stop himself, Harry smiled against the other man's mouth, breaking the kiss.

He turned away and walked over to sit on a large rock that looked out over the water, feeling Severus sit down on his left.

"Severus, I need to know what we're doing here. I'm tired of all the back and forth that goes on between us. It does nothing but screw with my head and make me feel like complete shite about myself. So please, I would really like to know just what it is you want."

Severus was quiet for a long moment and when Harry glanced up at him, he was staring at the water in front of him, looking lost in thought. Harry patiently waited for him to begin speaking.

"For the longest time I have distanced myself from those around me. It isn't anything personal, it's just...easier. I've grown used to the life I live and throughout the years I have adjusted well to being on my own. So well, in fact, that when all of this began to happen, I wasn't sure what to do with myself. So I did what I always do when I feel myself getting close to somebody; I pushed you away. I will admit that it was a foolish mistake on my part. I meant everything I said to you last night, Harry. Every damn word. But then again, it's not like it matters."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Harry asked "Why wouldn't it matter?"

"Nothing. Never mind." Severus said

Harry sighed, beginning to get agitated. "Seriously, what in the hell are you getting at?"

"You're still seeing Boot are you not?" Severus asked

"Well yes, but it doesn't-" Harry began "I just mean that you're-" He stumbled over his words for a moment before falling silent. He stood up and began pacing with his back to Severus who had remained silent up to this point. Harry turned back around to face him "I just wanted to say- dammit what I'm trying to say is that you're the person I want to be with, Severus!You may think that I've moved on, but I haven't. Sitting in your classroom, seeing you every single day, it drives me absolutely mad. I've never felt such strong feelings for anybody in my entire life like I feel for you."

"Be with me then." Severus said "_Be with me_."

Harry stared at him. Was Severus actually standing in front of him telling him that he wanted to give this a real shot? Was he actually willing to take the risk of getting his heart broken again?

"Do you really mean that?" He asked "Because I don't want things to turn out like they did last time and also-"

"Harry." Snape cut him off, leaning down and kissing him softly.

As Harry wound his arms around his neck and responded to the kiss, he finally knew that this was exactly where he was meant to be.


	28. Chapter 28

During lunch the following day, Harry finally tracked down Terry whom he had been avoiding ever since the day after he had snogged Severus in the corridor. He walked over to the Ravenclaw table and asked if they could go talk somewhere in private. Harry truly did feel terrible about cheating on him and now breaking up with him, but after last night, he had finally came to the realization of whom he wanted to be with. He figured that the Terry would officially get the hint if he kept avoiding him, but he figured he at least owed it to him to end things face to face. They walked out of the Great Hall together, standing off to the side of the marble staircase.

"So why haven't I seen or heard from you in the past few days?" Terry asked before he had a chance to speak

"I'm sorry," Harry said "To tell you the truth, I've been doing a lot of thinking...about us." He said, not meeting his eyes.

"What does that mean?"

Harry swallowed hard, deciding to get straight to the point. "I-I think maybe we should see other people."

Terry said nothing in response, only lowered his gaze down to stare at the stone floor. "So," He cleared his throat after a moment and Harry noticed that his voice slightly shook as he spoke "Are you seeing somebody else?"

"No." Harry lied, feeling like a complete piece of shit for doing so, but obviously he couldn't tell him that he was choosing their middle aged potion's professor over him. "This is just something I need to do for myself right now."

There was another long pause "Alright." Terry said

"Alright?"

"Yeah. To tell you the truth, I've seen this coming for a wile now. I don't know, I could just tell that things weren't going to last for the long run. I just want you to know that I had a lot of fun with you and I still think you're an amazing person. I'd like to try to stay friends if that's alright with you."

Harry felt a lump rising in his throat. He felt like the biggest asshole in the entire world right now. He just hoped he was making the right decision here and wasn't leaving the right person for the wrong one. "Thank you. That means a lot and I'd like to stay friendly as well," He said. " Well, I'm gonna go get something to eat."

"Alright, see you." Terry said, turning not to go back to the Great Hall, but out on the grounds instead.

Harry let him go, having seen the flash of pain go through his eyes as he walked away, even though he was acting like the break up hadn't phased him in the slightest. Despite all of his guilty feelings about what he had just done, Harry felt the stress he had been carrying with him constantly for the past few days melting away as he joined Ron, Hermione, and Seamus at the Gryffindor table a few minutes later.

He hadn't been sitting there for all of five minutes when Seamus inquired as to where Terry was.

"We broke up." He said nonchalantly, beginning to tuck into a platter of fish and chips.

"What?!" Seamus exclaimed

Hermione, who's attitude toward him still wasn't exactly the warmest, merely looked up at him with a half raised eyebrow before turning a page of her newspaper. Even though she was pretending to read, he knew she was secretly listening.

"Yeah. It just wasn't working."

"But-"

"Sorry guys, but I really don't want to talk about it." He said, shoving a few more chips in his mouth and standing up to go.

"Aw come on, you don't have to leave, mate," Ron said quickly "If you don't want to talk about it you don't have to."

It wasn't until that moment that he really appreciated how much Ron had seemed to mature in the past few months. "I know," He said "I'll catch up with you guys later."

He glanced up at the teacher's table, hoping to catch Severus' eye, but he was engaged in a serious looking conversation with Dumbledore at the moment. By the grim looks on both of their faces, he wondered if he should be worried about what was going to happen next in this bloody war. Oh, how badly he wished that it would soon be over so everybody could stop living their lives in fear.

Harry had a Defense lesson until Thursday afternoon, but he didn't think he could wait that long to talk to Severus. After dinner that night, he made an excuse to his friends about a detention and walked the path down to the dungeons. He paused in front of the door that let into Severus' chambers, unsure of whether it was okay for him to just show up like this. Eventually he told himself to stop being such a pansy and raised his fist up to knock on the door.

It flew open almost immediately and he let out a small noise of surprise as Severus grabbed his arm and pulled him inside, quickly glancing both directions in the empty corridor as he did so. Satisfied that nobody had seen, the older man shut the door and locked it, leading him into the sitting room. He sat down on the couch and Harry was surprised as Severus sat next to him instead of his usual arm chair.

"So, I broke up with Terry." He said, getting straight to the point

"I'm glad," Severus said "I meant what I said, Harry. I want to give us a chance."

"I do too." He agreed, leaning in and kissing him once on the lips. When he pulled away, he knew that he had a stupid grin plastered to his face, but he didn't try to hide it. His heart melted as Severus flashed him a genuine smile and slid an arm around his waist, pulling him closer as they settled back into the couch.

They spent the next half hour or so discussing what had been going on in their lives for the past few months. He didn't do much talking, not wanting to disappoint Severus by telling him that all he had been doing was getting messed up lately. Severus rattled onto him about a new potion that he was working on. It's purpose was to trigger the minds sub-conscience or something like that. Harry thought it sounded like more of a drug than a potion in his opinion, but then again, he wasn't the potion's master here.

"What are your plans for this Saturday evening?" Severus abruptly asked

"I don't think I'm doing anything." He said

Severus shifted on the couch, clearing his throat "Well, would you like to get out of here and go do something or-?" He left the question hanging in the air

"Hmm, like a date?"

To his amusement, the color of Severus' cheeks turned to a light pink "No, not a date," He said "Just a-"

"A not date?" Harry prompted with a smile

"Yes, we can call it that." Severus said

Noting that it was ten minutes to curfew and his friends were probably wondering where he had disappeared to, he realized he had better go.

Severus walked him to the door and he was somewhat disappointed when the man made no move to embrace him, but he quickly resolved to himself not to think too much of it. Harry turned his hand on the door knob, checking to make sure the corridor was clear before beginning the walk up to Gryffindor tower.

…...

On Saturday evening, instead of heading down to dinner with the rest of the school, Harry stood in the middle of his dormitory in only his boxers. Clothes were flung all over the floor and across the bed. He had spent the past thirty minutes trying to put together an outfit, eventually pulling on a pair of jeans, black combat boots, and a white v-neck shirt. He finished by spraying himself with cologne and and shrugging into his leather jacket.

Checking his watch, he pulled his cloak over himself and walked down to Severus' chambers. Harry knocked, but received no answer. He knocked again and paused, listening. Silence. Was Severus blowing him off or what? He had told him to meet him in his quarters at seven and it was currently ten past. Just as he was about to walk away, the door flung open.

"Sorry," Severus apologized, already hurrying back into the house "I'm running a bit late."

All of his prior annoyance melted away as he entered the sitting room and caught sight of his date. Severus was wearing a pair of light washed denim jeans and a gray cashmere sweater. His feet were bare and his hair tousled like he had just gotten out of the shower. Harry couldn't resist raking his eyes up and down the older man's body. He was definitely sexy all right.

He blushed and looked away as Severus turned back to face him, more than likely catching him in the act of checking him out. "I'll be out momentarily. Feel free to take a seat if you wish." Severus said, retreating back to his bedroom.

Harry crossed the room and sat down on the couch. After a few minutes of waiting, he began to grow bored. He stood and walked over to the book shelf in the corner, skimming through the titles. All boring looking books about potions. He moved on to the other book case next to the fireplace, surprised to discover a rather wide selection of Muggle novels. There were several plays by Shakespeare, classics like The Great Gatsby and Wuthering Heights, and even a few more modern books. Harry spotted The Bell Jar wedged in between two tattered looking books and snatched it off the shelf, carrying it back over to the couch. Sylvia Plath was his favorite poet and he'd wanted to read this book for months now.

He was hardly into the third page when the floo lit up. Fearing that it was Dumbledore or another authority figure, he jumped up and ran into Severus' room before whoever it was would have the chance to get a look at him.. The older man looked up from tying his shoelace. "Someone just came through the floo." He whispered. Severus calmly stood, motioning at him to stay where he was. A few excruciating moments of silence passed before he heard a man's squeaky voice coming from the sitting room.

"Harry you can come out." Severus called a moment later

When he entered the sitting room, a short little bald man was standing next to the fireplace. The man was wearing pink dress robes and a white hat. He had a monogrammed ring on his pinky finger and silver bracelets around his wrists. Harry eyed him rather suspiciously, not quite sure what to make of him.

"Harry, this is Art. Art, this is Harry."

"Nice to meet you." Harry said politely, reaching out to shake his hand

Art shook his hand up and down rather vigorously "Such a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Potter!"

"Please, just call me Harry." He said

Severus looked down and checked his watch "We'd better go soon if we still want to make our reservation. Art, do you mind if we step through?"

"No, no, not at all! Do try not to ash on the carpet though!" Art said before disappearing

They stepped through the floo into a rather ridiculously decorated foyer. Harry had to purse his lips tightly together to avoid laughing in amusement at his surroundings. He honestly couldn't decide which was worse, the bright yellow walls or the hot pink flamingo fountain in the center of the room. Art bid the both of them goodbye and they set off walking. After covering the length of several long city blocks, they finally made it to their restaurant, a chic looking french place in the heart of SoHo. Severus kept his hand on the small of his back as the hostess led them to a table set for two. They sat down across from one another as the waitress came by to take their drink orders.

Dinner was a rather laid back, enjoyable affair. They ended up spending the greater part of their meal laughing quietly to themselves at the old man in a corner booth who kept dozing off only to be awoken by his angry wife swatting him over the head with her handkerchief.

When the check came, Severus grabbed the check book and shoved some Muggle bills into the leather booklet. "Thank you for dinner" Harry said as they maneuvered their way out of the crowded restaurant.

"It was my pleasure."

Harry lit a cigarette as they began walking down the sidewalk, sneaking a glance at Severus out of the corner of his eye. The night was going great so far, but he couldn't help but wonder if the man was as nervous as he was.

"So, where to now?" Harry asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between them.

"You'll see" Was all Severus said in response

They set off walking down a rather crowded street and he couldn't stop himself from slowing down to check out his surroundings. Vendors lined up and down the block, each selling delicious smelling food for only a few pounds. A group of young people stumbled out of a club, laughing and clutching half empty tankards while a shirtless man with dreadlocks chased after his dog. The faint sound of a ukulele could be heard amongst all the madness and it brought a smile to his face. While he had been to London many times, it was the one city that he never seemed to grow tired of.

The two of them eventually ended up walking through a dark, deserted looking park. He couldn't help but wonder why Severus had brought him here, but he continued to follow him in silence, past the wooden benches, past the play set, and up a rather steep hill. When they reached the top, Severus transfigured a blanket out of thin air and spread it out among the grass for them to sit on.

"I have something for you." Severus said, beginning to dig around in his coat pocket

"Really?" Harry asked, surprised

Severus nodded in response, pulling out a small sandwich baggie and handing it over. The smell of dank bud filled the air before he even opened the bag. Harry took a nug out and examined it in appreciation underneath Severus' wand light. It was light green with orange hares and crystals on it.

"Is this what you two were doing in the sitting room earlier?" He asked

Severus nodded "He said it's called Blue Dream. It's imported from Peru."

Harry thanked him, knowing how much it had probably cost him. Severus blew his thank off with a wave of his hand. He glanced around to make sure they were completely alone, feeling in his jeans pocket for the sneak-a-toke he usually carried on him just in case. He broke up the bud and filled it to the top. Taking a hit, he was pleased to discover that it was smooth and didn't burn his throat, unlike some of the stuff he had been smoking lately.

"So how do you know that Art guy?" He asked as he exhaled and passed it over to Severus 

"I've known him for years. He was a good friend of John and I's back in the day."

He nodded, unsure of what to say. Severus had never really talked to him about his relationship with John before and Harry couldn't help but wonder if he had ever really allowed himself to grieve over his loss before. He could tell by the tone of voice he got the few times he had spoken of him that he had rarely, if ever, talked to anybody about it. He glanced at Severus as he held the bowl out to him. The older man was staring straight ahead like he was in another dimension. "I'm sorry," Harry apologized "You don't have to talk about anything you don't want to." They finished the bowl and Harry shook two cigarettes out of his pack, offering one to Severus.

"It's alright," Severus said, reaching his hand out for the lighter "I was just...thinking."

Harry lay back on the blanket, looking up at the stars. There was such a clear view from here. He took a long drag of his cigarette, the menthol tasting much stronger than usual. Severus relaxed his body next to his, pulling his knees to his chest and leaning back on his elbows.

"Have you been keeping up with your classes?"

Harry inwardly groaned at his question, knowing that Severus already knew the answer as he had just failed a Defense test last week. And Defense was his favorite subject. In all honestly, he had been behind in all of his classes since the beginning of the year. He just didn't see the point in school anymore, therefore he had no motivation to even try. At this point, as long as he didn't fail, he could care less what his grades were. "I'm assuming you graded my last test." He said

"I did. And the one before that. And the one before that one as well. Is it no longer your ambition to become an Auror?"

"Not so much," He admitted for the first time to anybody but himself "I've actually been leaning more toward Psychology lately- you know, the study of the mind. I read a book over it this summer and it really interested me. I guess I just wanted to become an Auror because it was what was kind of expected of me from everybody else. I don't know," He said "It's probably too late to do anything with my life now that I've fucked up my entire sixth year."

Severus stared at him long and hard for several moments. When he spoke again, his voice was soft. "It's not too late. Not if you actually have the will to try."

"I don't know-I just- I just don't feel like I should have to decide what I'm going to do for the rest of my life right now. I'm only sixteen. There are so many more things I could be doing with my life. What I would really love to do is take a year off...go see the world." He absentmindedly fondled with the leg of Severus' trousers as he talked

Severus turned over onto his side, propping his head up on his arm "I really like that idea," He said "What most people, Wizards especially, don't tend to realize is that life is a rather precious gift that we all take for granted. I wholeheartedly encourage you to do whatever it is that makes you happy because in the end, that's what's really important."

"I agree with you so much. As a society, we focus too much on money and what the ideal picture of success is. You know, I think that I'm going to schedule a meeting with McGonagall next week to discuss switching around some of my classes."

"Let me know if there is anything I can do to help," Severus said, looking down at his watch "It's after eleven, we'd better get back to the school soon."

They gathered their belongings up and he looped his arm through Severus' as they disapparated. After several moments of feeling like he was being squeezed through a tiny test tube, they landed on their feet at the apparation point and began the walk back up to the school. Severus stopped him at the edge of the woods.

"I had a rather enjoyable time tonight." 

"I did too" Said Harry

"May I see you again soon?"

"Of course" Said Harry, finding it adorable that the man thought that he had to ask. They walked side-by-side to the Entrance Hall, where he expected they would part ways, but Severus insisted on walking him up to the seventh floor. Not wanting him to get away without a proper goodbye, Harry reached for his hand in the darkness and pulled him into an empty alcove. Their lips sought out each other in the pitch black and he found himself backed against the wall. They snogged for several minutes, not wanting to let go. Severus eventually broke the embrace and led him over to the portrait hole.

"Good night Harry" Severus whispered, kissing him softly on the lips before turning and walking back down the corridor.

When Harry entered Gryffindor tower, he was absolutely floating. He spotted Ron sitting in an armchair by the fire and collapsed into the one next to him. The red head looked up from the chocolate frog card he had been reading.

"You and Terry get back together or somethin'?"

"No, why?" He asked

"You just look really happy or something."

Harry caught himself smiling at his words "Yeah, I am." He said, offering no other explanation as he rose from his chair and headed up to the dormitory. For once in his life, he was starting to think that everything might just work out in the end after all.


	29. Author's Note

Author's note:

While I have no intention of abandoning this story at the present moment, I'm just curious to know how many of you would read if I did a rewrite of Fix You? I feel like I didn't take enough time to plan this story out before I started it and it hasn't really gone in the direction that I planned it to. My rewrite would spend more time developing a relationship between Harry and Severus, and put Severus a bit more in character. As a plus, Terry probably wouldn't play as big of a part in this story. I also wanted to focus more on the Malfoy's and a few other characters, but found it hard to fit into the story. The idea to do a rewrite just came to me a few chapters ago and I have seriously been pondering it ever sense. As my followers are the one's that I'm writing this for, I'd appreciate any type of feedback that you guys have to offer!


	30. Author's Note 2

I'm very happy to say that the first two chapter's of the rewrite are now up! The plot may seem the same for now, but I have bigger changes in mind for the near future. Be sure to review and let me know what you think!


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